The expert spoke live on PSYCHOLOGIES about what prevents us from achieving what we want and what we should pay attention to if we want to fulfill our cherished dreams.
Last week at a live broadcast took place, during which the editor-in-chief of the project, Natalya Babintseva, talked with psychologist Alexander Shakhov.
The specialist told how to set goals so that in the coming 2022 we will see clear results. We share the main life hacks with you.
Try to make your intentions public. According to statistics, a wish spoken out loud comes true 80% more often, said Alexander Shakhov. Therefore, you should not be skeptical about summing up the New Year results and voicing plans, for example, on a personal blog.
Plan, don’t dream. According to the psychologist, people usually do not see the difference between a dream, a goal and a plan. In this regard, many make a wish, but not everyone thinks about how to realize it. A successful person must track his goals and analyze progress towards them: what helped on this path, and what hindered?
Alexander Shakhov gave his own example of reasonable goal setting: “I remember how, at the age of 14, I lay on the couch in Petropavlovsk-Kamchatsky. I dreamed of visiting Germany, Italy and France, but did not even understand how to leave Kamchatka – there were only three educational institutions in my city. But now, after 30 years, I have traveled to 35 countries – all thanks to my courses.
Be objective. Do not go to extremes, summing up the New Year. If you didn’t succeed in realizing your plan, understand why it happened. Maybe it’s better for you to give up on what you have planned and try yourself in something else? It’s the same with success: praise yourself, but don’t stop there.
Remember that success does not come without mistakes. “It’s like riding a bike,” Alexander explains. “During the first trip, you are guaranteed to fall a few times.” But the sooner you “fill the bumps”, the faster you will come to the desired result, the psychologist is sure.
Let go of the past. Remember how in childhood? The girl broke the vase, and her mother lamented: “What have you done?”, “Think about your act!”.
But instead, the daughter could think about how to fix the situation now so that she doesn’t make the same mistakes in the future. The habit of thinking about the past slows us down and prevents us from moving towards the goal, Shakhov believes.
Don’t label. “We are not afraid of mistakes, it is not inherent in human nature. We are afraid of repeating our experience, ”the expert believes.
There are a number of erroneous self-identifications in our head, such as “I did a bad job, so I myself am bad.” Such logical chains should be broken. Remember that smart people do stupid things too, as well as vice versa.
Set realistic goals. To ensure that you reach your goals, Alexander Shakhov recommends using the Japanese technique “kaizen”, which means “one minute”. The essence of the technique is to achieve goals step by step, and not dream of a one-time implementation of plans.
For example, when learning a language, you can set yourself a goal of ten new words a day. However, after a few days you will forget what you have learned due to the fact that your brain will be overloaded with information. Instead, try learning one word a day, and by the end of the month, you’re guaranteed to know at least 20 words. 20 is more than zero, right?
Make the Wish Map work for you. The fact is that most people present the “wish card” as a “self-fulfilling prophecy,” the expert emphasizes. After all, at all times people dreamed of finding a magical way to achieve what was planned. However, from the card of desires, one can demand not a magical, but only a psychological action.
How it works? You always see the visualization of your desires before your eyes and strive more and more to realize them. At the same time, as we said earlier, it is important not just to look at the picture with an apartment or car, it is necessary to calculate the actions that will lead you to your cherished goal.
Live recording can be found at .