Global, frightening events and problems unsettle us, undermining our emotional and physical health. It’s time to remember the simple little things that still surround us in everyday life. By learning to notice them and enjoy them, we can help not only ourselves, but also those close to us to survive stressful periods and maintain emotional balance.
Every new day brings us problems. Weeks, months and years pass like this. Worries and stressful events can vary in intensity and degree of impact on life, but often they grow and consume us, forcing us to focus only on the negative.
The generally accepted strategy for dealing with serious problems is based on two common truths: “keep the situation in perspective” and “do not pay attention to the little things.” Psychologist and family counselor Kurt Smith questions the second statement, reminding us that it’s the little things that matter. It is necessary to set aside time to notice and appreciate them. This is important for mental health and enjoyment of life in general.
What happens when we ignore the little things?
Focusing on small events and experiences may seem unnecessary in a world focused on big goals and global problems. But it is the deep anxiety that causes us great difficulties that often overwhelms and paralyzes us. Focusing on something important is good, Smith says, but myopia along the way can become a trap and cause anxiety, depression, and uncontrollable anger.
Many live in constant anxiety, worrying about what’s next, what needs to be done, and who or what we’re behind in this race. Because of this, it may seem that the world will collapse as soon as we stop spinning like a squirrel in a wheel, stop doing the next project, or lose focus.
Failure to balance big goals with small pleasures leads us to push away the people we love.
Of course, at the level of reason, we understand that this will not happen. But it is difficult to cope with the constant internal itch that prompts you to strive for new achievements instead of stopping and noticing the little things that bring pleasure. This also leads to negative physical consequences. High blood pressure, heart failure, stroke, and other health problems can be linked to constant stress. Even the ones we create for ourselves.
This affects not only us. Failure to balance big goals with small pleasures leads us to push away the people we love. Most of our happy memories are associated with small things, good moments of everyday life. By ignoring them, we stop building meaningful connections with family and friends. And this, in turn, leads to serious tension in relations with those who are dear and needed. This is especially harmful to communication with children.
Small Things and Mental Health
When we focus on achieving success, we over-focus on the “big” and it can be disorienting. To always look into the distance, to the final goal, means to constantly feel that we have not yet reached it, acting incorrectly or not moving fast enough. And this often means a constant feeling of failure.
The ability to pay attention to small pleasures helps to look at life differently. By becoming more attentive to what is happening in the moment and appreciating it right now, we can “ground ourselves” and feel connected to the world and ourselves. We can put our fears and anxieties into perspective and stop the buildup of anger, worthlessness, and dissatisfaction over failure.
Taking your eyes off the “big picture” from time to time will keep your goal in mind. It can help move you towards more.
And most importantly, writes Smith, the result will be instantaneous and will not require effort. A stranger’s smile, a pleasant smell, a taste, a kind word, and a million other little things are still the events of the day that we may have grown accustomed to overlook. Studies show that if you start paying attention to them purposefully, the production of serotonin in the brain increases. As a result, anxiety, anxiety, anger, and even depressive states begin to decrease or disappear. And the more often this happens, the more tangible the result can be.
Ultimately, if we learn to make time for the little things, it can make life more fulfilling and enjoyable, helping us to feel more in tune with the outside world and loved ones. And it can have a huge impact on our mental health. “By taking your eyes off the big picture from time to time, you will not lose sight of the goal and the world will not collapse. In fact, this can just help you move towards more, ”the psychologist believes.
About the Author: Kurt Smith is a psychologist and family counselor.