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Hello dear blog readers! Proxemics is a science that deals with the study of interpersonal communication, only at a non-verbal level. It is a whole separate branch in social psychology, and quite significant. Its main feature is that it studies only the location of the interlocutors in relation to each other or in general in the room, depending on the time of day and well-being. It also helps to determine what feelings a person has for others, whether he sincerely speaks of love or friendship.
Levels
Edward Hall first spoke about this science in the 1950s. He noticed a pattern in the fact that people are located in relation to each other, depending on what they are currently feeling. That is, our movements during a conversation are not random, and each of them has its own specific characteristics. Edward even singled out 4 zones that surround each of us.
Sommer called them the “spatial bubble”, that is, these are the boundaries that we talked about in the article about personal space, and now I propose to consider them in more detail.
Intimate (50 cm)
It has almost no distance. That is, people who are in it usually either hug or kiss, touch each other and so on. As you understand, few people get so close, so there is rage or aggression if one of the outsiders comes close.
That is why, after being in public transport, some people experience severe discomfort for a long time. Evil reactions seem to be out of place, but unpleasant sensations arise, and they have to be suppressed, almost committing violence against oneself. Such a reaction arises due to the instincts of self-preservation inherent in nature. Any invasion is perceived as an aggressive act, which is why the body mobilizes all its resources and takes a fighting position.
But how then to cope with such stress and tension in cities, megacities, where it is impossible to avoid physical contact with strangers, and sometimes quite unpleasant people? And it’s easy, between the inhabitants of densely populated cities, a number of unspoken rules have arisen that allow them to maintain psychological comfort and inner balance, despite the invasion of their intimate space.
For example, you will rarely find individuals in a public place who talk too loudly, disturbing the general peace. And then, if there are any, then, most likely, they will be teenagers, or under the influence of alcohol. It is also forbidden to closely and carefully examine those who were nearby in transport, premises, etc. Otherwise, such a view will be interpreted as an invitation to create a conflict situation.
Residents of villages, who are not accustomed to such a large number of people around, get into the city for the first time experiencing tremendous stress. It affects their well-being and psyche until they adapt and stop reacting sharply to such a close location of strangers.
The concept of intimate space is partially different for different peoples of the world. For example, in Eastern Europe this distance is up to 45 cm, and in Western Europe — up to 60 cm.
Personal — from about 45 cm to 120 cm
From it it is easy to determine in what kind of relationship people are. Because, for example, a wife and husband look perfectly calm at such a distance. At the same time, people who have just met will experience embarrassment, excitement and excitement.
Introverts tend to increase the distance during a conversation, as their inner world is of the greatest value. They are trying to provide him with maximum security, letting only certain, relatives and close people, time-tested, come closer.
Interestingly, not only the environment has an impact on the definition of personal space, but also age. Teenagers tend to be as far away from others as possible, as well as middle-aged people. Old people and children need closeness, attention, therefore, when talking with them, we can sometimes feel that they have not only exceeded the limit of the personal zone, but are already encroaching on the intimate.
With superiors, subordinates try to practically not intersect, but with colleagues at a fairly close distance. Proxemics also studies the influence of gender and even height on the choice of distance during a conversation. It turns out that the higher a man is, the closer he tries to become, and vice versa, the lower, the farther away he goes. For women, the opposite is true.
This happens because of the stereotypes and canons of beauty that exist in society. They dictate that a girl should be fragile and petite, but a guy should be powerful and tall.
Allocate a close personal zone, where friends and relatives are admitted, and a distant one, where colleagues, acquaintances, clients, etc. are located. It is generally accepted that not only introverts try to communicate on the far frontier, but also individuals with a low level of self-esteem. The more insecure he is, the more often he will avoid crossing with others, being more calm when there is no one around, respectively, threats and tensions as well.
Social — distance from 1 m 20 cm to 3 m 50 cm
Usually social space is used to get a good look at who you meet. After all, the further you stand, the better you can see, more angles and opportunities open up to see an object or subject in general, and only then, gradually approaching, focus on the details.
Most relevant in business relationships, especially during meetings, when all participants have to sit at the table. This does not oblige to rapprochement and physical contact, but at the same time it allows you to have conversations. And the further away a person is, the less familiar he is, which is why it is necessary to first look at him to determine whether the danger comes from him or not.
If the interlocutor comes closer than 1 m 50 cm, this means that you have already had to deal with him before. A rectangular or square table is more suitable for internal meetings, where the leader gives instructions to subordinates. If he has an authoritarian style of management, you can put a chair, more massive than the rest.
If you need to make a deal with partners, clients, etc., you should choose a round table. This subtle nuance creates a trusting atmosphere. Communication in this case will be more open and relaxed, as all participants will feel on an equal footing.
It is very interesting that unconsciously people divide the space in which they are, that is, they draw an “invisible” border along the same table, determining where is its territory and where is someone else’s. And if you move an object from “his” part to your own, this can be perceived as a threat and an invasion, which will result in a completely aggressive reaction. At a minimum, you can not hope for favors, but as a maximum — if this person has difficulties with setting boundaries and so on, he may well resort to assault.
If you want your partner to feel comfortable, position him at the table so that there is a wall behind him. When there is some movement behind the back, anxiety and anxiety arise.
Public area — from 3,5 to 7 meters
It is mainly used during reports and lectures, sometimes even with the help of microphones and loudspeakers. Such a distance does not cause embarrassment from proximity, and also suggests a calm state, even taking into account the fact that the speaker, or simply being in the audience, is being observed, considered. Because it doesn’t look aggressive. If the other person decides to attack, the intended victim will have time to dodge to escape, so self-defense instincts are not activated.
Exceptions to the rules
People who have not been able to successfully complete the socialization process have problems with interpersonal communication. They react very painfully to the presence of other people nearby, sometimes even acquaintances.
Therefore, they try in every possible way to avoid contact by acquiring adjacent seats in transport, or folding outerwear and bags on nearby chairs. Aggressive individuals, on the contrary, not only expand their zone, but also encroach on someone else’s.
I think some of you have come across individuals who like to sit with their legs wide apart, or actively gesticulate, waving their arms, risking hitting the interlocutor.
Boundary Tricks
If you are interested in knowing how someone feels about you, you can experiment by observing how the person is positioned next to you. Take a closer look at how close he comes, does he get close? If suddenly, under some pretext, for example, having stumbled, you suddenly find yourself too close, then see how he reacts. Will he leave or stay put?
If you stay where you are, in that case, you have little chance, you are considered more simply as a friend, acquaintance, and so on. If the body body leans towards you, then I hasten to congratulate you, you are attractive to this person. But this technique is only suitable for persons of the opposite sex.
Did you know that if a woman violates a man’s intimate zone, it will not cause such a strong aggressive reaction as if a man violated a woman’s?
It happens that we are not always told about what is alarming and disliked by other people, which is why, unwittingly, we violate their boundaries. So, I propose to consider non-verbal signs that you are overdoing something. Do you want to be a pleasant conversationalist who is respected and sincerely glad to see you? Then, noticing at least one of the following manifestations, stop yourself and try to correct the situation:
- Fidgeting on a chair, sofa — they just want to run away from you;
- Tapping, both with fingers and with a foot — anxiety and tension, impatience;
- Squinting — there is no strength to look anymore either;
- Hiding the neck with raised shoulders is self-defense;
- Reliance on hands, as if trying to get up — the interlocutor was about to leave.
Be careful in your research, and do not make hasty conclusions, since it is necessary to take into account not only age and location in relation to you, but also nationality, temperament type, well-being, size of the room, social status, and even the content of the conversation is of great importance.
Only comprehensively, taking into account all the factors, it is possible to draw objective conclusions. You will find some nuances that will help simplify this process in the article «The most interesting features of non-verbal communication between people.»
Other nuances of proxemics
- In addition to the distance, it is also taken into account in which direction the bodies of the interlocutors are turned. For example, if you see a company of people on the street who have become in a circle and closed it, then you should not interfere, interfere with them, otherwise everything may not end very well for you. Because the closed circle is a signal to others that they are unwanted guests at the moment.
- Have you noticed that, being in a company, and not having the mood and desire to communicate at all, or due to embarrassment, you just sat and were silent, and planned to spend the rest of the evening like this, but at some point you were inexplicably drawn into the conversation? Do you know how it happens? If you look closely at the silent person, then look at the one who speaks, and vice versa, there will be an illusion that people who are in the company are included in the conversation, regardless of whether they are actively behaving or not. So this method can come in handy if you want to help someone join an unfamiliar team.
Conclusion
And that’s all for today, dear readers! Finally, I want to recommend that you look at an article about non-verbal relationships, because non-verbal is not just a means of communication, it is something akin to a lie detector. It is on gestures and facial expressions that they pay more attention, considering them more truthful than words, and why, you can find out from the above article. Take care of yourself and loved ones!