Who among us (at least once) did not want to punch the keyboard? Who hasn’t felt desperate when reading the instructions for a new phone or DVD player? The more advanced technology becomes, the more difficult it is to use—and the more often we feel helpless.
62% of computer users admit that they “quarreled” with their computer more than once, 31% beat the mouse on the table, and 15% pushed the monitor away from themselves with irritation*. Alas, the computer can be cursed, scolded, but if you do not press the correct key, nothing will work. This is what makes us angry. In communicating with people there are halftones, the ability to arouse sympathy, to achieve that we are heard. And technology is indifferent to our emotions.
Make a good deal. And yet, many of us perceive our gadget as a living being that provokes them. But if we can seriously resent: “He is mocking me!” Why not try to negotiate with him? “Be patient, give your computer or laptop the opportunity to “think”, tune in to you,” advises narrative psychologist Ekaterina Daichik. — He who is in a hurry and irritated is more likely to make a mistake. And when we say “come on, dear,” we ourselves calm down, our actions become more thoughtful and more correct in technical terms.
Forgive yourself for mistakes. The world around us broadcasts to us the idea that a successful person today should be easy to manage with gadgets. When we fail to do this, we attribute the difficulties to our own stupidity, get nervous and angry. Try, Ekaterina Daichik advises, to ask yourself: “Is everyone around me equally easy to use such complex devices?”; «Is there a difference between the skills of people with different education?». The tension will subside when we understand that being worse than someone else with technology does not mean being a loser.
Be more forgiving. Experiencing an inferiority complex in relation to technology, we rarely ask ourselves: are these devices themselves perfect? Until there are computers with emotional intelligence that can recognize our mood from facial expressions and voices, we should lower our expectations and be a little more lenient with them: not every device has to work flawlessly. Anyone who understands this will react more calmly to the next system failure — and he will, there is no doubt about it.
* The results of a survey conducted by sociologist Marleen Brinks are published in his book Aggression gegen Computer. Stuttgart: ibidem-Verlag, 2005.