When we want to determine whether a number is even or odd, we think a little. How often do we do this, mentally repeating the usual “lifesaver” when we hear “wand”? And if the “flower”, then the “seven-flower” is immediately remembered. Of course, there are people for whom the “stick” is associated with the name “Koch”, while for other specialists the “flower” immediately takes its place in Carl Linnaeus’ plant classification system. However, they are in a clear minority. Is it possible to replace blanks with a customized solution? I think it’s quite — and it’s done faster than you might think.
At the Distance, they were given a task to work out the exercise — “fix the moments when the mood goes down, and track what thought is behind this emotion.” At first I thought: this is a lot of work! There are more reasons and reasons than in the cornucopia! I know from experience that behind each exercise lies the development of some kind of “promising” habit, which has great prospects for improvement. Marina Konstantinovna warned that we should mark only templates. You can learn more about this in the article by Nikolai Ivanovich Kozlov on Psychologos, see →
I note that tracking thoughts and emotions associated with them is my habit from early childhood. Thoughts seemed to me at that time like little birds, and such a «bird-catcher’s work» was a very exciting activity for me. However, in recent years, I have been looking for thought patterns to improve my mood. The statement once heard helped: thoughts, like birds, land on our heads, and we are not able to forbid them from doing this. However, it is in our power not to let them build their nest there.
There is still a difference between catching birds or butterflies in a sunny meadow and systematically tracking mental reactions followed by a brief report. I took up the «hunting for templates» seriously — I began to fix which stereotyped thought lowers or can lower my mood. After a couple of days of observation, I came to the conclusion that the template is a kind of stencil that I habitually impose on the “embryo” of thought. This idea does not develop further as I want. And not in the way that I need for my benefit, for a smile, for work! It’s just a thought that spreads like a well-trodden path or channel. And they (were) imposed on me by public opinion or common clichés that I heard somewhere. Having traced this pattern, I began to remove the template reactions and replace them with what I need for my task, for my purposes.
As a result of the research, I have identified several categories of such “thinking patterns”.
1) What concerns me: because I do it (or all) slowly; because I do not have time; because it won’t work; because last time; because I had … and I list the facts from recent years. The power of habit is really great! But it can be changed — fortunately, I have a positive experience.
My actions: I remove these “definitions” (sometimes thrown by someone as a joke, sometimes out of anger, and sometimes just thoughtlessly, for the sake of a red word), I remember my successes and achievements (which I write down weekly). As a result, I note that there is progress in business — and this is an objective fact. Verdict: obsolete templates of this group should be removed.
2) Something that is related to some facts, actions in the recent or distant past. For example, you need to solve a problem with Telecom or with a public utility. I no longer include the usual pattern: again unpleasant negotiations, again the loss of time, of course, a spoiled mood for the whole day, and approach things differently.
First, this is my job. So, I will once again pump my skills of successful negotiations, as I can, and I do it successfully. Secondly, I will do it on time, as I have many other tasks for the day. Thirdly, I keep my mood cheerful. A smile, a speech configurator, and my immediate goal is an uninterrupted Internet connection.
I conclude: Deprecated templates in this category should be removed to the Museum of Obsolete Templates. Yes, it’s not worth throwing them away at all: you never know, it may later come in handy in a certain situation. In addition, such reactions are also part of my «I». But now I know: patterns serve me, not I serve patterns.
3) What is connected with the actions of other people. He / she did (said) so-and-so, which means that he treats me disrespectfully. I do the exercise “Remove Expectations”, remember the Declaration of Acceptance of Reality and turn on “Inner Good”. If it was an erroneous action (inaction) or statement, then I I remember the exercise «Mistake», which can also be applied to other people, and not just good for yourself.
4) That which relates to thoughts, phenomena. Heard something, read something, several people repeated it this/last week. The information flow sometimes acts like a funnel on a person. However, everything depends on the degree of awareness of people’s lives (or lack thereof). I have these tricks there are tools to counter — I remember my values, life roles, tasks, goals, which is important for me and my dear people, friends, like-minded people.
At the same time, removing the old template (reactions, thinking, actions or inaction), I give it a new name or new content, the one that I need now or for the future — for a good mood, for productive work, for a comfortable attitude.
The work has just begun, I will certainly continue it: it is very interesting to be the founder of the classification system for unconventional mood enhancers. In addition, I need to first complete the preliminary work of identifying template mood lowerers, dividing them into classes, categories, and also giving them wonderful formulations.