In adolescence, life is full of difficulties and experiences. And parents want to protect their beloved child from trouble, to calm and console him. What worries teenagers and how to help them cope with problems?
Many parents find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that children are less reliant on adults when they face difficulties and more and more turn to friends. But interaction with peers and the support of friends have a positive effect on the development of the child and strengthen the sense of belonging.
This was proved by a group of psychologists from Murdoch University and Griffith University in Australia. They published the results of a study that involved 108 teenagers aged 13 to 16 from low-income families.
During the week, they filled out questionnaires 5 times a day. Teenagers answered the question: “Has anything bad happened to you since the last survey?”, rated the unpleasant event on a 5-point scale (from “so-so” to “very bad”), and briefly described the events that occurred.
They then noted how happy, sad, lonely, envious, or worried they felt at that moment, and recorded who they interacted with at that time. Researchers have found that teens deal with failure more easily when they interact with peers rather than adults.
Moreover, the method of communication does not matter – correspondence in social networks is as effective as a live conversation
Study leader Bep Wink explains: “Social support and distraction helps teens get through the rough and tumble of everyday life.” For example, when a child fails a test or exam, friends encourage, cheer up and help to forget about worries.
Study co-author Katherine Modeki observed: “Friends seem to act as an emotional tonic for teens. At least in the short term.” This is especially true for girls, they often talk and discuss problems, boys talk less often, they usually do physical activity together.
What worries teenagers? Bep Wink named typical problems, such as breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend and problems with studies. But psychologists also noted additional stressors: forced sex, racist attacks, fights, living away from loved ones, responsibility for younger siblings, working at night to earn money.
It seems to teachers and parents that they should mitigate the stress experienced by teenagers. But it is better to encourage children to learn to help each other. In this way, they learn social skills: to be kind and considerate, to understand others and sympathize with them.