Depression, conflicts with parents and peers, difficult exams, unhappy love… Strong experiences can push a teenager to a terrible step. How to catch alarm signals and prevent tragedy?
In terms of the total number of suicides, Russia is in fourth place in the world – after India, China and the United States. Although the number of suicides in Russia is declining, suicide is still one of the main causes of death for young people. Psychologist Sergei Sokolov explains how to prevent misfortune.
“First of all, it is necessary to clearly distinguish what drives a teenager who tries to lay hands on himself.
His behavior may be demonstrative. A teenager seeks to draw attention to himself and his problems, to show that it is difficult for him. Manifestations can be different – from small cuts of the hands to poisoning with non-toxic drugs and the image of hanging. Usually this is done not in order to cause real harm to oneself or take one’s own life, but in order to frighten others, make them think, “realize” their unfair attitude towards him.
Another variant – affective behavior. The teenager acts impulsively, without a clear plan. Strong negative emotions – resentment, anger – prevent him from adequately perceiving the situation. Most often they resort to hanging attempts, poisoning with toxic and potent drugs.
true suicidal behavior – the most dangerous. This is what most often leads to death. A teenager is preparing to commit suicide, thinks out a plan of action. In such cases, teenagers often leave notes addressed to relatives and friends, in which they say goodbye to everyone and explain the reasons for their decision. With true suicidal behavior, more often resort to hanging or jumping from a height.
How to understand that a teenager is serious?
It rarely happens that no one from the teenager’s environment knows about the impending suicide – neither friends nor family members. He can state this both openly and in hints, warning that he is tired of this life and thinks only of death. Here it is important to hear and understand how serious his intentions are.
In any case, if a teenager spoke to you about committing suicide, his words should be treated with the utmost responsibility. It is important to understand that in this way he asks for help.
Affective suicide is very difficult to prevent, for this you need to be nearby. But if the decision to leave this life is thought out and planned, loved ones are more likely to notice the problem and take action.
Almost always, suicide is the result of not one problem, but several.
This step, as a rule, is preceded by a more or less long period of experiences, a struggle of motives and a search for a way out of the situation.
It is believed that a teenager who once tried to commit suicide will make another attempt, and so on until his intentions are crowned with success. Actually it is not. If a teenager fails to commit suicide the first time, there will usually be no further attempts.
What can be an alarm?
He has severe depression. We are talking about a pathological decrease in mood. If a teenager often looks depressed, irritable, withdraws from communication, find out what is bothering him.
He behaves defiantly. Pay attention to any expression of emotions (as well as appearance) unusual for a teenager. Perhaps, with his behavior, he is trying to attract your attention, to convey something.
Depressive notes appear in his work. If your teenager’s drawings or music are dominated by death and suicide motifs, this may be a signal to you.
He changed the way of life, interests, image. How is your child currently doing? What might be bothering him, in your opinion, right now? Talk to him about it. Show your caring and caring attitude.
He can’t make sense of his feelings.. Teenagers on the brink of suicide may experience hopelessness. At the same time, they hope for a favorable solution to their problem. Remember: often the desires for and against suicide are so balanced that if loved ones guess the intentions of a teenager in time and show attention and care, the scales most often lean towards life.
Talk with your teenager more often about the favorable prospects for his formation and development as a person. Give positive examples from your own life, from the lives of friends.
If a teenager does not make contact, you should definitely seek help from a psychologist, psychotherapist.
Always remember: first of all, relatives or friends will be able to assess the depth of emotional experience. Therefore, one must be very careful in relation to their loved ones of adolescence. Then you can prevent trouble.”