Perhaps, the absolute majority of parents with children 2-7 years old are familiar with the situation: the child does not want to take care of himself. The toys in the house are a wagon and a small cart, but the child drags the adult tail, asks to play, whines “I’m bored”, “I want a cartoon”, makes eyes like a cat from Shrek or has nothing to do, starts a showdown with brothers and sisters (with adults can too). From time to time this is still all right, but if it is constant?
However, it is quite possible to teach a child to occupy himself on his own (it is not necessary to play). By and large, you need little: room for activity (so that there is something to dig), a good imagination and a certain amount of preliminary attention from parents. This is what will be discussed.
It is clear that in any situation it is necessary to make allowances for age and individual characteristics, but if the child does not play at all on his own, or plays poorly and little, you can try to complete several (or better, to the maximum) points from the proposed list.
— Start reading with your child. If not accustomed — accustom. If you read, there will be more imagination, perseverance, interest in the world around you.
— Very often, daughters and sons do not want to play on their own, simply because they need, in fact, not a game, they lack a parent nearby. Sometimes a baby just needs half an hour to be read to him, lie in an embrace on the sofa, chat, and so on. The chance is very high that after that the child will go to study on his own. Therefore, it is optimal to devote 15-20-30 minutes a day strictly to a child (or children), without being distracted by the phone, cooking, cleaning, etc.
— When the child worked out on his own (even if it was 5 minutes), rejoice at how good the game was, praise for the invention — both face to face and boast to relatives. What is encouraged is developed.
— First, play with the baby, then just beside him, drink some tea, while “praising”, occasionally wondering how and what (but not pushing), then you can slowly increase the distance.
Let the toys be freely available so that you can use them at any time. At the same time, you should not give the entire arsenal for use at once. Once a month and a half, scoop up a large bag and hide it (in the closet, on the balcony, on the top shelf of the closet), and give the same bag back. Children will be delighted with “new old” toys as if they were new.
— Limit cartoons to at least 20 minutes a day. Do not give a tablet or other gadgets. “It’s broken”, “the doctor ordered to take care of your eyes so that you don’t wear glasses”, “let me play with you, read, work out together.” Howling, crying and enduring a horse top. Gadgets can occupy a child, but they are not able to develop it, and from preschool age, accustoming a child to the virtual world is a dead end, for all its external attractiveness and convenience for parents.
— Limit the word «impossible» in the apartment in terms of subject matter. What the child asks for, what he climbs, what he is interested in — let it be possible. Gu.e. saying “no” money, jewelry, documents. Although, again — why not play with washed coins (if the baby is no longer eager to put everything in his mouth)? Or mother’s jewelry not to see together? Spin porcelain cups?
— Gently push the child to a particular activity. Just pulling out some old raincoat, a hat, a pair of shoes — there is already a great chance that the child will want to dress up. Set an example: the parent himself to do modeling, feed the dolls, and so on. With an expression of pleasure and enthusiasm. You can be sure — they will come to you!
— In every possible way to encourage the interest of a small person in the world around him, good, for this it is not at all necessary to get encyclopedias or educational games.
Let’s take a walk for example. Sometimes a child stops at each pillar, finds some small things on the ground and strives to grab, admires each worm for 5 minutes, grabs each dandelion and demands to explain what is drawn on each showcase. Amazing. Here you need to relax and enjoy. Do not pull when climbing somewhere, lying on the sand, trying to touch the dirt, and so on and so forth.
Or, for example, you should not do all the household chores while the children are sleeping or someone else is busy with them. They are actually very interested in all this. It’s not very convenient to prepare a full meal with helpers every time, but when the main meal is already there, why not make a salad? Or lay out the linen, sort out the towels, throw the linen into the washing machine, explaining, showing, letting them try it for themselves … For children, this is really both in favor and in pleasure.
There is interest — you should not interfere with him, and even more so, pester the child with constant notations, pulling and prohibitions. It is possible, of course, to raise a person who does not need anything but a computer, sluggish and apathetic, who is not interested in the world around him, but what’s the point?
— An adult does not need to be an animator and entertainer all the time. As in Marshak’s wonderful verse: “It would be nice to be bored!” Be there, but do not rush to occupy your daughters and sons every minute. If they have access to a lot of things, they are full (this is important!) And you just read, talked together with pleasure, the chance that the children will occupy themselves is huge. But they themselves should not be left defiantly, but under a respectful pretext such as cooking dinner or “working”.
In general, I would formulate the main rules in teaching a child to occupy himself independently as follows:
— to allow the baby as much as possible to everything interesting to him, to the world of «adult» things and affairs, not to limit the scope of activity only to toys;
— do not get into his games and activities when they are not asked;
— at least not to interfere with invented games, in every possible way to encourage the slightest initiative;
— do not constantly act as an entertainer-animator;
— talk with the child as much as possible, — explain, answer questions and ask them yourself, fantasize;
— read together.
And then more and more often there will be a beautiful picture in the house that warms the heart of every parent: the child (or children) play themselves …