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Step 66: “The outer world is changed by improving the inner world”
The 88 rungs of happy people
In this step I teach you how not to project your own frustrations onto others
You are going to love this Step. Not only when you read it, but when you can seal a lot of cracks in your life with it. This is what it is about.
Every time something that you perceive bothers you, that which bothers you outside of you has a counterpart within you, and the reason why that outer area bothers you is because its inner counterpart is ill. Pay attention to what comes next … The way to cure what bothers you outside is not by changing what is outside, but by healing what is inside. Every time you heal the inner counterpart that is sick, you are deactivating that outer area that bothers you. Does this mean that curing the inner counterpart removes the outer? Definitely not, as the outside world cannot be controlled or eliminated. So by healing the inside, you will not eliminate the outside area, but it will stop bothering you.
Look at this story.
Elisabeth lives in a small apartment in New York, very cozy and very much to her liking. A snowstorm has arisen and the thermometer shows the lowest temperatures of the year. Elisabeth has a very powerful heater that makes your home always perfectly warm. Yet for some reason, it’s freezing today. It’s polar cold inside, even though the heating is on full blast. Elisabeth inspects the house and finally finds the cause of the problem. There is a crack in one of its walls. He immediately starts to seal it as best he can and in a matter of minutes his whole house returns to normal. Elisabeth takes a deep breath, sighs, and enjoys the renewed peace of her home.
Did you manage to raise the outside temperature by one degree? No. Has the storm stopped? Obviously not. Would it make sense to try? It would be absurd, since storms don’t stop. Why then has it worked? Because it has cured the problem inside and with it has deactivated the one outside.
Whenever something bothers you outside, ask yourself: “What is my crack?”; your crack inside.
If you are bothered by the photos that your classmate hangs on social networks displaying her gym body and you want to block her from seeing them again (this is your storm), perhaps it is because she reminds you how unhappy you are with yours. Or maybe it’s because, if you don’t allow yourself to brag about yours, “why can she brag about hers?” The solution is not to block it, but to analyze what bothers you. If you don’t like your body, you can observe that fact and learn to love yourself as you are, or you can make the decision to get in shape. If it was the latter, you can pay attention to the fact that it bothers you that she shows off when you don’t and focus on healing that internal restlessness of yours (this is sealing your cracks), and give her an eleven-letter mental gift: I wish well.
If it irritates you that someone is the center of attention (storm), maybe it is because you have not overcome your shyness (rift). If you are worried about your brother going backpacking around the world (storm), maybe it is because you have never dared to leave the house (crack). If you are angry that your boss has a lot of money (storm), maybe it is because you regret not having undertaken something (crack). The solution is never to remove the storms, but to seal your cracks. Sealing a crack does not eliminate the problem on the outside, but it does heal the problem on the inside. It won’t stop the snow, but it will stop you feeling cold.
# 88StepsPeopleHappy
“The outer world is changed by improving the inner world”
@Angel