Crooked letters, scraps of paper torn out of nowhere – but this is not the main thing in them. And the words that were to my mother at that moment are needed like air.
The life of any mother is full of feelings. Love, anxiety, joy, fear. And also a sense of guilt. It is familiar to everyone: everyone is tormented, and whether children receive enough attention. What is the worst, objectively something is difficult to do with it: you have to work, or even earn extra money, go shopping, do household chores … Time for yourself? Well, great if it works.
Amy Nelson, a lawyer and mum of two from Michigan, also lives like this.
“It often seems to me that all I do is take the children to school, work, pick them up from school, work again. Then have dinner, check your homework and go to bed. And every night, when I kiss my sleeping children, it comes to me – a feeling of guilt, ”says Amy.
There are many worries: did mom devote enough time to her children? Did you forget to tell me how much she loves them? Was the dinner a complete one for two growing organisms? Have they watched too many cartoons today? Wasn’t I too strict in scattering them to their beds when they still wanted to lie down with me?
There is usually no one to dispel these doubts. Moms just do everything they can, hoping that everything is not in vain and one day someone will tell them: you did everything right, you are great. You are a good mom. Amy was lucky: she saw a real recognition that she really does everything the way it should. Well, almost everything.
“One morning I was about to leave, went out into the hallway, where my documents and keys are usually kept. But they were not in their usual place. I rushed to look for them – time is running out, I’m late! And then I saw them on the table. Nearby lay the notes that my 8-year-old daughter wrote for me before bed, and a few more things that she collected for me to take with me, ”says Amy.
Reading her daughter’s scribbles, drawn with an unsure hand on scraps of paper, the woman could not refrain from crying. There was a note under the driver’s license and sunglasses: “Ready to get behind the wheel?” Nearby lay several rings – the girl’s most precious treasures. Next to it is a note: “You can take whatever you want.” Earrings: “You seem to like them.” “Do you want to eat?” – this note my daughter put in a lunchbox along with soup, water and oatmeal. And one more piece, crushed to the table by several small coins and keys: “I give you the keys to my heart.”
“She may not even understand how much these notes mean to me. Thanks to them, I realized that perhaps I am not such a bad mother. Probably, I’m doing something right. “