At the University of Practical Psychology, one of the practical tasks is to write a letter to a loved one, such as a spouse, about a situation that categorically does not suit you. Here in the article I tell you how to build such a Conversation about difficult relationships. But specific situations are all different, and here I give a variant of a conversation about smoking, and here I give a mild version of such a conversation.
So,
I want to speak with you. We can’t do it orally, so I’m writing you a letter.
Smoking and me are two things that don’t go together. I have an aversion to the smell of nicotine and cigarette smoke, it is very unpleasant for me to be near a person from whom this heavy smell comes. And I also want to kiss you … You know, my protest against nicotine is not only something psychological, it’s reality, it’s an objective: I start to choke and cough for a long time in the car if you start smoking. And one more thing: I want to have children, I want children from you, we want children together, but while you are smoking, I am not ready to plan motherhood. I think you want healthy children too.
Tell me how can we solve this problem? Can you solve this issue?
I cannot build a common life with a person with whom I cannot kiss and from whom I cannot have children.
What can we come up with? This is very important for me.
I hope this letter is of use to some of you. Do not smoke yourself — and do not need loved ones to smoke next to you.