Simba, you have deeply disappointed me! You almost died. You deliberately disobeyed me! And besides, you put Nala at risk!
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A fragment from the cartoon «The Lion King» is a good version of a conversation between a father and his son who disobeyed him. The type of interaction is prepared disassembly. Steps:
- Designation of the topic of conversation and their feelings.
You deliberately disobeyed me! Let’s go home! (there will be a conversation)
- Forcing the situation
Punishment with silence and a pause, an order to take Nala away, a promise of a Terrible Lesson to his son.
- Setting the Format of a Serious Conversation
Seriously call, look seriously, demand obedience during a conversation. Here Simba had to come up himself and sit right next to him.
- A stern reprimand with love: an enumeration of mistakes and sins, but in this enumeration one can hear concern for those we love.
Simba, you have deeply disappointed me! You almost died. You deliberately disobeyed me! And besides, you put Nala at risk!
- When (and if) the son admitted his guilt and mistakes (sincerely), we soften the situation and transfer it into instruction for the future
Talk about when and how to be bold.
- Switch to something warm and unifying
To convey «I love you» with words and reality, for example, switch to a common cause or game.
Comments
There seem to be two reasons behind Simba’s misconduct: the lack of the necessary knowledge and skills, and, perhaps, a little struggle for power: «I have the right to do my own thing, it is not necessary to listen to my father.» In this situation, so that there would be no more struggle for power, the father used: 1) pressure with fear, 2) an explanation of the rationality of obeying, 3) teaching to obey (through a format). And due to the lack of the necessary knowledge and skills, he gave instructions for the future.