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Hello dear readers. Today I would like to talk about who a self-sufficient person is, as well as who and why it is necessary to develop this quality in oneself. The concept itself is not unambiguous, therefore, depending on the situation and the use of the skill, it can bring both constructive and negative results. Let’s take a closer look.
The concept of self-sufficiency
Self-sufficiency is a quality that allows a person to fully live his life without relying on others and fear of loneliness. It is not a separate feature, but a combination of many human manifestations, which ultimately come down to the possibility of manifesting maximum independence.
There are several types of self-sufficiency:
Household — Includes self-sustaining skills. This includes not only the ability to earn the necessary amount of money and distribute it according to one’s own needs, but also self-care skills.
An example would be the ability to cook, the ability to use household appliances, the ability to build routes to the required point, and many other points. Children are extremely not self-sufficient in everyday life. Children usually do not know how to use most technical devices, and also cannot simply feed themselves.
Psychological — implies independence from communication. This is a kind of ability to calmly endure loneliness, the ability to occupy oneself when no one is around, the absence of panic reactions in silence.
A person who constantly surrounds himself with friends or acquaintances, just not to be alone, constantly calls someone out of idleness or feels an almost physical need to communicate with the same people every day — he is psychologically dependent. It is important to separate these behaviors from stress and grief reactions. They in extreme manifestations change attitudes and psychological needs of contact.
Social — includes achievements measurable in society. This includes positions held, level of education, scope of skills, success and self-realization. Those. just being smart, strong, beautiful (especially according to my mother) is not enough, you need social recognition of the high level of development of these qualities and simultaneous independence in development.
One and the same person can be self-sufficient in all three parameters or cope with only one. At the same time, the way of organizing one’s skills determines how favorable self-sufficiency is for a particular person.
Positive and negative self-sufficiency
From the definition of the term self-sufficiency, it is clear that this quality is useful for everyone to develop. Basically, it’s a great social survival skill. However, like all multidimensional concepts relating to the human psyche, self-sufficiency can have a distorted manifestation in which it brings harm.
An example of a healthy and positive domestic self-sufficiency would be a person who earns enough money. He organized the delivery of products, mastered all the achievements of technology for self-sufficiency and does not need outside help.
This situation develops into a negative manifestation quite quickly, immediately after such a person completely limits contact with society and closes in his isolated world. So, overdeveloped everyday self-sufficiency gradually destroys social skills. This can ultimately lead to personal change.
Signs of healthy psychological self-sufficiency are manifested in the ability to experience moments of loneliness, not to impose on people, the ability to solve all their emerging issues without advice and shifting responsibility. However, when such a person ceases to take into account the opinions of others and take the initiative in communication, he remains alone.
Remember at what point you lose the desire to call your friend, whom you need to constantly invite to meet, and he condescendingly accepts the invitation or refuses. It is much more pleasant to call someone who himself periodically appears and offers interesting ideas for spending time together.
In social terms, negative self-sufficiency can look like manifestations of omniscience and tyranny. What is the point of considering yourself the coolest specialist if you are still not called to work because of a difficult character ?!
Similarly, seeking constant social support for one’s accomplishments only creates the appearance of success. The one who really takes responsibility for his life and actions, hobbies and interests, does not close himself off from people and does not show snobbery. On the contrary, such people are always open to practical advice, wise suggestions, but they leave the final decision to themselves.
For a mature person, the reaction of others is only feedback. It may or may not be considered, depending on the importance of the goals, but it is never a determining factor in behavior or decision making.
What affects the level of self-sufficiency?
Self-sufficiency is not an innate quality, nor can it be acquired once and for all. With the passage of life, the formation and passage of various crises, a person acquires new abilities, skills and outlook on life. Mistakes made and analysis of situations add experience and form independence. The social environment also plays an important role.
The more a person takes responsibility for what is happening in his life, the greater the level of self-sufficiency he acquires. It is important to monitor the preservation of the constructive direction of development.
It is also worth remembering that the level of manifestation of this quality may decrease at the time of experiencing acute stress and after it. During such periods, a temporary personal rollback occurs. The stronger the trauma, the further the person is thrown back into childhood. Remember how after experiencing the death of a loved one, many cannot go to work or even get up to cook their own food. Someone forgets to change clothes or perform hygiene procedures.
This is not only negative stress, but also drastic positive changes:
- falling in love reduces concentration of attention and makes a person unable to solve previous problems;
- motherhood narrows the circle of interests;
- fees for a long-awaited trip can lead to a feeling of complete helplessness before choosing tickets.
All these cases require outside help, despite the fact that earlier a person could calmly solve the problems that arose on their own. The only difference is that mature individuals with a high level of self-sufficiency, after experiencing destabilizing events, not only recover, but also gain new experience. It helps them become even more resilient in subsequent situations.
At the same time, those who did not know how to experience difficulties on their own may finally break down or remain at a reduced stress level. In this state, it is more convenient, less energy is spent.
Development of self-sufficiency
The easiest way to become self-sufficient is to take responsibility for your own life. This means that you need to take the following steps:
- stop waiting for favorable changes, but start planning them;
- instead of requiring others to fulfill their desires, begin to act in the direction of their implementation;
- be responsible for the consequences of their actions.
Household
These tips are rather abstract, they show the general direction. But what about those who are at the beginning of the path to independent organization of their lives? It is worth starting with the household or economic part of the manifestation of this quality. To do this, you need to learn:
- Earn Money. Earn not for sweets and entertainment, but for self-payment of housing, clothes, food and other essentials);
- Serve yourself and your household needs. You can learn to cook or use a slow cooker, or you can enter into agreements with restaurants and delivery services — the main thing is to organize your own quality food;
- Take care of your body, beauty and health. This includes the organization of the right way of life, the acquisition of a minimum knowledge in the field of medicine in order to be able to provide first aid to oneself and others, as well as constant measures regarding the care of appearance.
Psychological
Psychological self-sufficiency requires more mental strength, but less cost of action. For its development it is necessary:
- Revise the circle of communication, leaving only those who are really important;
- To work out internal complexes and psychological traumas that develop a dependent position and make you constantly wait for support and waste your time to please others;
- Practicing solitude that brings benefits — for this you can set aside one day or several hours in each day, when you will devote your time to self-development, reading, taking care of your body, while not contacting anyone. This practice adds stability in situations of sudden loneliness, and also allows you to better understand your own desires.
Social
Social self-sufficiency develops organically through the development of the first two basic ones. The more a person sets goals for himself and successfully achieves them, the higher his level of self-sufficiency. Obviously, such a position is mature, and responsibility can significantly change the life line.
Conclusion
If you have coped with this article and think that you are a self-sufficient person, then I recommend that you read the article about self-actualization. This will be the next stage on the path of your self-development.
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