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Is it acceptable to reward a child for doing household chores? In many families, this issue becomes the subject of controversy. Some parents feel it is right to show their children that money is earned through hard work. Others are sure that the child should know that household chores are his duty as one of the family members, and not a way to earn money. Here’s what parents, financial advisers and psychologists think about this.
“If you pay children to help around the house, one day they may decide that for such money it’s not worth even straining”
Kerry Flatley has two daughters – 9 and 11 years old. Once a week, Kerry gives them a dollar amount equal to half their age. This pocket money has nothing to do with household chores, and the girls have a lot of it: they feed the pets, sweep the floor and participate in the monthly general cleaning on an equal basis with the rest of the family.
Flatley believes that household chores are a contribution to the common cause. She doesn’t want kids to calculate which tasks are worth their money and which aren’t. “If you pay children to help around the house, one day they may decide that such money is not worth even straining,” says Kerry. – And you will have only two options: let the children give up their duties or increase their “salary”. Personally, I don’t like any of them.”
“I want to teach them that hard work and helping others are not necessarily about money.”
Former elementary school teacher Joanne Krohn also tries to separate the pocket money her children receive from their chores around the house. Her ten-year-old gets $6 a week and her five-year-old gets $4. Children lay out money in three banks: one for spending, the second for savings, and the third for charity. Her children have the opportunity to buy what they want. For example, the eldest daughter buys clothes with this money – in addition to what she needs for school.
“I want to teach them that hard work and helping others are not necessarily about money. Participation in public life and in the life of the family does not require payment,” Krohn explains.
Both moms say they won’t give kids less money if they don’t do their homework well. They will take other measures, such as not allowing children to watch TV or go out until the work is done.
“It is important to visually show the child that in the real world money is connected with work”
Sahirenis Pierce is a financial consultant who teaches young people how to manage their money wisely. Her children are still too young to take on household chores, but when they grow up, Pierce plans to pay them a reward for helping out. “I don’t think it’s right to give children pocket money just for the sake of it,” she explains.
Pierce is going to divide the responsibilities of the children into three levels. For “self-service skills”: brushing teeth and making the bed – children will not receive money. While dusting and taking out the trash, they will receive a kind of “base salary”, and for additional efforts on their own initiative (for example, her daughter loves to water flowers), they may be entitled to bonuses.
While the children are young, Pierce plans to give them money twice a week, and when they go to high school, they will begin to receive money once a month. So they can learn how to manage funds in the long term.
The most common duties are making the bed, taking out the trash, and taking care of the animals.
Financial planner and father of six, Gregg Murset, also believes that children should be paid for doing household chores. He is one of the founders and CEOs of BusyKid, the company behind the app of the same name, which allows parents to reward their children for completing tasks. It also gives toddlers the ability to categorize their funds into spending, saving, and helping others. “It is important to show the child that in the real world, money is related to work,” Merset explains his position.
According to BusyKid statistics, the most common tasks given to children are making the bed and nursery, brushing teeth (although this task can hardly be classified as household chores), taking out the garbage and caring for pets.
How much are parents willing to pay for this? The creators of RoosterMoney, another pocket money and task tracking app, estimated in 2018 that American children ages 4 to 14 earn an average of $8,74 per week. The highest paid duty is babysitting: the average remuneration for young “nannies” is $12,44. Gardening brings in an average of $9,93 for kids and $5,57 for cat care. Parents are willing to pay about $4,83 for washing the car, and cleaning the house with a vacuum cleaner is estimated at $2,57.
What do child development experts say?
Stephanie Lee, director of the Center for the Study of ADHD and Behavioral Disorders at the New York Institute for the Study of the Child Mind, believes that monetary rewards for errands can do a lot for a child: so he learns from an early age to appreciate money. However, Lee notes that this method is not suitable for all families.
“First of all, parents should clearly decide what they want to teach their children. Do they themselves set a worthy example, do they demonstrate in practice the qualities and skills that they want to instill in a child? she clarifies. For the development of important life skills in a child, it is worth giving him the opportunity to participate in family discussions on financial issues, conducting them in a form accessible to the baby.
“On the one hand, we do not want children to think about “adult” problems. We don’t want them to worry about money, about whether their parents can earn enough money, she argues. “But at the same time, it is important for most parents to educate them industriousness and thrift.”
She advises parents to check if their children are learning financial planning skills by tracking their spending. It is also worth observing what decisions kids make when playing “financial” games – for example, Monopoly.
Of course, the child has responsibilities for which you will not pay him.
“For many families, money is a sore subject, but it is important to find a way to explain financial issues to children in an accessible way from a very young age,” said Emily Edlinn, a clinical psychologist in Illinois. A lot of things in our life depend on money. We don’t want children to worry about financial problems, and we feel like we care about them without talking to them about these topics. But in reality, we are depriving them of the opportunity to learn critical skills.”
Gregg Murset, although he supports the idea of rewarding household chores, admits that he would never pay children to perform certain tasks. “Of course, the child has responsibilities for which you will not pay him. Personally, I will not give children money to make their beds and someone else will willingly do it. And that’s okay. The main thing is to find what suits your family.”
“Every family is unique,” agrees Joanne Krohn. – Some parents really want to teach their children hard work, from an early age to show that money is earned by work. Of course, this is necessary and important. But I want to show my children that the main thing is to be part of a family.”
Source: The Huffington Post.