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Sex Christmas seriously harms the health … of couples
The Christmas holidays are the time of year when statistically most relationships are broken, especially consolidated ones
Although it is thought that the beginning of summer is the time when most breakups are experienced, it is actually Christmas that moment of greatest vulnerability for couples. This is supported by statistics. Data from the Statistics Service of the General Council of the Judiciary (CGPJ) confirm that 26% of all Spanish divorces in 2018 took place after the Christmas holidays. For its part, the data collected by the “Information Is Beautiful” portal, in which the activity of the 2.271 million active Facebook users has been observed when they update the tab that indicates “Sentimental situation”, highlights that a few weeks before the The beginning of Christmas is the most likely time for a couple to break up.
«Summer is also a vulnerable time, and it has a common factor, because both periods have a family intensity», Explains Adrián Montesano, professor at the UOC’s Studies in Psychology and Education Sciences and an expert in family and couples therapy. “The difference with Christmas is that you will not only spend more time with your partner, as in summer, but also with your family of origin,” adds the expert.
The teacher also makes a note, and it is that although this time is more “dangerous” for couples, “we must see the whole as a process.” «A break is long, in this case we are talking about couples who have been together for a long time, and when we see that a time is coming when they will be forced to spend a lot of time in company, the break is precipitated, “he explains.
Francesc Núñez, sociologist and director of the UOC’s Master’s Degree in Contemporary Art, Literature and Culture Humanities, agrees: «It may be that they take advantage of Christmas to communicate a break that has been« cooking »for some time. Christmas forces you, forces you to live it as a family period of emotional proximity to yours, and this family and loving environment it makes it even more difficult to maintain a relationship that has been deteriorating for a long time.
Ideal breeding ground
Professor Montesano comments that, although the statistics are clear, it is necessary to “look at each case.” «There are couples who are not at all cared for and it is in these periods of intensity that they realize that they are having a hard time; there are other moments, a situation in which the whole family is, and they drink alcohol, they begin to argue and it is the last straw…, There are many variants ”, he comments.
But, breakups and separations are also very frequent when eating in January, as if they were “New Year’s resolutions”. “Many people take advantage of a certain date, in this case the beginning of the year, to make decisions. It is not plausible to me that it can be very general, but there may be some case that decides start the year with a new life in which there is no longer room for a deteriorated relationship, “explains Dr. Francesc Núñez.”
Professor Adrián Montesano confirms Núñez’s approach. «It can influence that Christmas means a personal review period and therefore encourages decision-making of this type. The clinical experience teaches us are habitual thoughts of the type: “If by Christmas the thing has not changed …”.
A break in time, a victory
Going through a process of breaking up during the Christmas holidays has its peculiarities. “Although it is something very personal, many people use these dates, in which they attend many social events, to explain what happened,” says Montesado, and continues: “This social demand can provide us with well-being and support link of ours, although for others, on the other hand, it can generate a lot of stress ».
Although a loss or break-up is always difficult to manage, Adrián Montesano emphasizes the idea that separation is often “the healthiest option.” “It is shown that chronic partner discomfort can have negative effects in the mental and physical health of people “, warns the teacher. “A break in time is always a victory,” he concludes.