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Sex after childbirth is somewhat reminiscent of a spacewalk: scary, nothing is clear, but very tempting. But you should not rush into this: gynecologists do not recommend returning to genital contact with a partner earlier than 1,5 months after childbirth. Although even after that, sex can cause ambiguous feelings. What sometimes goes wrong in intimate life after childbirth?
1. Body shame
I perfectly understand women who are embarrassed by the changed forms — I myself went through the rejection of the body after the first birth. helped me mirror practice. Its essence is that you consider the reflection of your naked body — but without condemnation and criticism. Repeat this practice for 21 days and you will be surprised how your perception of yourself will change.
And, of course, it is important to establish intimate communication with a partner so that he maintains your self-confidence. Try to find time for each other no matter what. The body will certainly change, but if you are close, hear and understand each other, then childbirth will only strengthen your connection. I had exactly that.
2. Pain
Pain after childbirth can be the result of episiotomy or ruptures, as well as vaginal microtrauma and spasms. You should not endure the pain — you need to see a doctor to find out the cause.
I know situations when the pain is so strong that a woman completely excludes sex from her life.
So it was with my student: for a whole year after giving birth, she did not have sex with her husband because of the excruciating pain. He faithfully waited for her to be ready. On the intimate gymnastics course we have worked spasmodic areas. Thanks to self-massage of the vagina and stretching, she was able to relax, she improved lubrication. After 3 weeks of training, she had sex for the first time after giving birth: there was no pain and she even had an orgasm.
3. Problems with lubrication
Due to hormonal changes, especially if a woman is trying to normalize lactation, she may have difficulty developing natural lubrication. And this can also contribute to pain. What to do? Use hypoallergenic lubricant water-based, stretch the vagina and pump intimate muscles.
4. Feeling of a wide vagina
Subscribers often write to me that their partners complain about the “wrong” sensations during sex after childbirth. It seems to them that the vagina has become wide and they do not receive good stimulation, respectively, and the orgasm too.
Let’s miss the point of ethics: as far as it is permissible to “throw” such phrases at your favorite. Another thing is that a wide vagina can be a symptom of pelvic prolapse, and this problem is much more serious than a disgruntled partner. If after giving birth you have a sensation of a foreign object in the vagina or stress urinary incontinence, be sure to consult a gynecologist. Do it before it’s too late. You don’t have to be afraid of the truth.
Omission in the early stages is easily eliminated with the help of intimate gymnastics and a vacuum of the abdomen — without expensive operations and without consequences
After the birth of my first child, my daughter Eva, I was also diagnosed with prolapse along the anterior wall of the vagina. And in just two weeks, I returned the organs to their place — with the help of Oddiyana, Nauli and intimate gymnastics. Intimate gymnastics for me is a giant resource for health, vivid orgasms, and confidence.
5. Decreased libido
There is no need to blame yourself, this is quite normal: after childbirth, hormonal changes in the body take place. And nature also protects you from re-pregnancy and wants to save energy for the baby. Another thing is if enough time has passed after childbirth, and you still don’t want sex.
What to do? Talk to your partner and explain the situation to him: so that he does not blame himself for your unwillingness to have sex, and also removes some of the household duties from you. After all, libido needs energy, and where does it come from if you are mired in everyday problems. Spend more time together so that you can again be in the role of people who love each other, and not just parents.
Also, be sure to get tested for hormones and see what medications you are taking. There are dietary supplements that reduce sexual desire — it is worth canceling them, and the libido will wake up. And of course, do breathing exercises and intimate gymnastics. They will energize you, you will improve lubrication and blood circulation in the pelvic organs, you will be more excited and want to have sex again. And what bright orgasms you will have …