Self-esteem – how to understand this term and what to do to raise it?

Self-esteem is basically what we think about ourselves and how we evaluate ourselves. It is very important for everyday well-being, as well as the ability to take initiative in life and build healthy interpersonal relationships. Unfortunately, many people suffer from low self-esteem. Sometimes it can be a symptom of a mental health problem, and sometimes you can train your self-esteem.

What is self esteem?

Contrary to appearances, self-esteem is not only a colloquial term, but a concept with a wide application in professional psychology. Self-esteem is synonymous with self-esteem. Self-esteem is an attitude, the general way we see ourselves. An important element in this view is the element of evaluation: self-evaluation determines whether we consider ourselves important, worthy of respect and acceptance, capable of making independent decisions. Self-esteem may not be correct. When it is too high, we treat others arrogantly, we are unable to listen to them and we still expect special treatment. And when self-esteem is too low, we let others take control of our lives, we are afraid to take the initiative and give up our plans, believing that we will not be able to cope with them anyway. Note: very often it turns out that too high self-esteem is actually an attempt to disguise low self-esteem from the world. It is worth knowing that self-esteem is not constant – it can change at any time in your life under the influence of various factors.

Why is self-esteem so important?

You could say that self-esteem is a kind of zero point in our relationship with the world. It depends on him whether we will be willing to take various initiatives, with what attitude we perform various activities, and whether and when we are discouraged by failures. In interpersonal relationships, self-esteem affects whether we are assertive, how much we trust people and how well we feel in their company. It’s worth remembering that this works both ways – people generally avoid people who are insecure, sensitive to criticism, and constantly apologizing for everything. Low self-esteem in a relationship can seriously disrupt the relationship with your partner, and when we enter into a relationship with low self-esteem, we may even come across a person who takes advantage of this fact and begins to abuse his position of strength.

Why do so many people have low self-esteem?

Self-esteem problems are very common in the modern world. There are many reasons for this: the world certainly places great demands on everyone, and advertising messages constantly convince us that we are incomplete without another new product. There is also evidence that, especially among the younger generation, low self-esteem is directly related to the use of social media: the very mechanics of these websites are conducive to listing likes or subscriptions compared to others, and many people get into complexes by watching the still studied, idealized materials of others users.

Low self-esteem is often associated with mental illnesses such as depression. However, it is often difficult to determine whether low self-esteem is the cause or the result of depression. In any such situation, professional help is necessary, including psychotherapy or antidepressants.

There are also many indications that self-esteem is related to upbringing. We build a child’s self-esteem by showing him feelings ruthlessly, not depending on behavior, recognizing his feelings and allowing him to make independent decisions. A child tormented by the fact that his grades are too low or that he cries for no reason will become an unhappy adult with low self-esteem in the future.

Self-esteem exercises

The opposite of low self-esteem is not pride, but realism. Therefore, try to write down your most important qualities, strengths, dreams, etc. on a piece of paper. Try to get to know yourself better in this way. Also, remember that self-esteem comes from practice: a lot depends on your assertiveness in everyday life or how you react to failures. Habits such as learning from failures or firmly denying others are nothing more than habits – they will become easier for you the more you use them, and in this way you can build your self-esteem.

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