The role of the family
One of the key factors affecting the self-esteem the young man is his family. It is from their closest relatives during the earliest years of life that children receive information about themselves: how they behave, what they are, what they could be like, etc. Also way of upbringing, i.e. rewarding for certain behaviors and punishing others, greatly influences the perception of oneself later in life. Other people are for us somehow “a social mirror”- thanks to them, a person learns how the lifestyle he / she takes or specific behaviors affects the other person. This is how it creates itself self-image. As a human being is a social being, unfortunately: the more negative feedback, the greater the likelihood that self-esteem will be underestimated.
Parent and peer group
It turns out that parents have a great influence on the self-esteem of their child. It is worth remembering that they are oftenpatterns “on which young people learn to function. Their habits, fears or fears can be easily adopted by a child. This mechanism works especially in early childhood. In adolescence, the peer group becomes very important for shaping identity and self-esteem. However, how a young person will function in it is related to how his self-esteem was shaped in the family home. A rule may work in this case “Self-fulfilling prophecy”- if a person does not accept himself, he may unconsciously behave in such a way that others will also ignore him and not accept him.
Ways of shaping self-esteem
So how can you influence children’s self-esteem? It is important for parents to follow a few rules:
- From an early age, it is important to allow a child to check what is good for him and what is not. The parent’s job is to provide him safe conditions experimenting, not forbidding researching the environment in which the child lives.
- Parents should not interfere with interested child, imposing them on it is disadvantageous. It seems important to support the strengths of a young person and allow them to pursue their passions.
- The child should be taught that both happen in life successes and failures. Understanding them as natural situations will make it easier to deal with them in the future – failure will not be perceived as failure, but will become a stimulus for goal-oriented action.
- It is worth remembering that it is more advantageous behavior evaluation the child and not him as a person. Such feedback shows positive and negative aspects, at the same time it is not harmful and does not give a “label”, for example “clumsy”, “stupid” that could affect the further functioning of the child.
- Conversationit is a very important factor in shaping a child’s self-esteem. It is important that parents take time to listen to their daughter or son. A situation in which a child can turn to a parent with any problem gives him a feeling of being valid and acceptedwhich is also extremely important for the formation of self-esteem.
Based on: “Eating Disorder. A guide for parents and relatives. D. Mroczkowska, B. Ziółkowska, A. Cwojdzińska