Contents
Scenarios in love.
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If a person loves, he cares about whom he loves, but caring for us is not always perceived by us with gratitude and delight. We have our own, albeit sometimes vague, ideas of what we need and how we need to be taken care of, and only if the lover acts according to a scenario that suits us, this care will please us. Accordingly, one of the important competencies in love is the knowledge of what and how to do to a loved one, so that he perceives and appreciates it as love, knowledge of the necessary scenarios and the ability to reproduce them.
pictures of love
We all love to dream about love and compose beautiful pictures of how people who love each other should live together. It seems to me that this is very important, and it is important to treat pictures of love not as empty dreams, but as specific instructions, as behavioral requirements: if in your picture you see that people who love each other behave in this way, it means that and do. Create pictures of happiness in love — and follow them as instructions. See pictures of love
20 manifestations of love
A good practical task: “Many in love appreciate beautiful and vivid experiences, but love manifests itself in actions, in deeds, in what we really do. List 20 things you do (or have done) for loved ones that you and those you love see as showing love. Here are lists made by various smart and loving people — perhaps after reading them, you will want to make your own list?
V.S.:
1. Just like that for no reason to give flowers.
2. write a message with kind words
3. iron your favorite work uniform
4. Give your loved one a massage
5. teach your loved one how to confidently give a presentation at a professional conference.
6. take the child to school in the morning, when your beloved has a day off
7. organize a weekend trip to the skating rink with the whole family
8. help your loved one type an article quickly because she can’t touch type
9. Prepare dinner if your loved one is tired or late
10. Hug just like that for no apparent reason and tell her how much you love her.
11. listen if something happened at work, soothe, comfort and cheer up.
12. warm up the car if it needs to go somewhere in winter, and it’s early, dark and cold outside.
13. take care of your health so that she enjoys being together.
14. break away from business, from the computer, when she speaks to me, turn to face her and respond positively in a friendly manner.
15. Kissing in an elevator, regardless of the fact that they have lived together for eleven years.
16. urgently go for a bunch of groceries in heavy bags even during an important hockey game
17. affectionately remind your loved one about training in the fitness room and motivate her to go there.
18. Take your loved one out for a walk in the park while the weather permits.
19. know what she likes and put it in her pocket without noticing when she leaves for work
20. Take charge of monthly utility bills.
VC.:
1. Donated time and energy, sometimes despite their scarcity. Knowing that a friend needs to edit the texts on his site, I will do this, despite my illness and fatigue.
2. Attention and strokes. These are warm friendly hugs, I call by name, I make my beloved the center of attention.
3. Spontaneity. When it comes to loved ones, I start to gush with ideas, I like to arrange surprises.
4. Carelessness. The opportunity to be with your loved one in a state of «here and now», to catch a wonderful moment of life, to sit in an embrace in silence, to admire the starry sky, to inhale the scent of rain.
5. Exchange of thoughts and feedback. My daughter and I have a favorite tradition. I put my teen to bed, pet his back, and wait to hear how the day went. Being in a light trance state, she often tells me her fears or “problems”, which are difficult to admit in a normal state. I also try to tell her about my failures in order to inspire confidence.
6. I give bright emotions and feelings. The holiday is not only on the red day of the calendar. You are at home, God, what happiness!
7. Willingness to take responsibility for a loved one. My mother taught me this.
8. Care. Focus on the needs of the loved one. What is important to him now? What can I do about it? I do. I cook, wash, bake pies, keep quiet, listen, admire, praise, buy gifts, do my homework, put me to bed, do a massage, stroke my hair and back.
9. Refusal of jealousy. A difficult point for me and a very important one. Give your loved one freedom and the opportunity to develop, build beautiful relationships with people.
10. Make your desires less significant if they differ from the desires of your loved one, find common interests. Make a decision from the 3rd position.
11. Unconditional acceptance. People are very different, everyone has their own characteristics, which I strive to understand, accept, do not filter out. Although I am a happy person, very good people are attracted to me.
12. Non-standard act, feat. Do something for your loved one that is outside your comfort zone. A few years ago I got married to my sister. At the time, this was unusual for me.
13. Willingness to obey the will of a loved one. In relationships with the opposite sex, this point remains relevant for me. Willingness to take responsibility in all areas of life is sometimes superfluous. Men like soft, supple and smart women.
14. I teach, I give knowledge. Recently, I managed to persuade my daughter to go to the gym. Since I myself have been in the club for eight years, I know the health benefits of exercising. She instilled the same love for sports in her girlfriend 3 years ago. The girl was considered unsportsmanlike, no one believed in the success of my undertaking. However, now she is the leader in her sports group, and she will not leave the gym voluntarily!
15. Giving up your dreams for your loved ones. It happens that a man is ready to give up personal happiness for the sake of the happiness of his children.
16. Interest in the affairs of a loved one. I support his undertakings and projects, I rejoice in his successes, I invest my time, energy, and soul in his development.
17. Willingness to grow personally. I am not only support for my beloved, but also his “business card”. For my beloved, I will learn languages, learn to ride a horse, give up meat, get another education, if necessary. In order to live with love for people, all the more you need to grow and develop.
18. Patience. I keep a calm emotional state in communication with loved ones, I am a patient teacher and mentor.
19. Respect and accept the values of loved ones. If a person is from a different culture, even just from a different family, their values may differ from mine.
20. Devotion. This is about responsibility and loyalty to loved ones.
S.T.
1) Hang his clothes in the closet;
2) Give a gift without tying it to any holiday. Such as, in my opinion, would be pleasant to him;
3) Listen to stories about his difficulties, problems, look for a solution together;
4) Teach something new, definitely useful;
5) Offer to talk when you see that a person is somehow uncomfortable;
6) Prepare dinner (lunch/breakfast);
7) Give a book to read that will help you understand something, learn something new and interesting; desired book;
8) Help clean the apartment;
9) Go for medicine when a loved one is sick / go to the store when no one is sick;
10) Invite your loved one to put a pillow under their head while watching a movie;
11) Help to adopt kittens (write to friends, etc.);
12) Take care of his cats: clean the toilet, feed, play, stroke, educate;
13) Provide support (words / deeds / just a hug);
14) Wash a mountain of dishes for both without a single word;
15) Call during the day and ask how things are going (like going to the dentist, first day at work, etc.);
16) Make a massage;
17) Prepare a bath;
18) Pay the general bill in the cafe;
19) Help make a gift for a friend;
20) Half an hour on the phone to explain what light bulbs and battery you need to buy in the store (as well as about power, voltage and other things).
I have a more romantic list that I myself wrote this fall on LiveJournal. 06.11.2011/XNUMX/XNUMX — What does it mean to love. A few broken lines. From the last.
This is to write only the word “Come” to a piercing and crumpled SMS.
This is at one in the morning, being at the cinema, to write: “I actually don’t like that you ride there so late …”
This is to speak many, many words of support on the phone, to hear every intonation, to ask: Should I come?
It’s to stop by for five seconds and bring a bag of Rafeelki and sweets, and also pine nuts in white chocolate — half a bag … like from the heart.
This is to chat until half past three, until almost closed eyelids.
This is to meet for five minutes to repay a large amount of debt.
It’s writing long letters to each other.
It is to say the simplest and most important words.
It is to forgive eternal delays.
It is to prepare delicious tea at two in the morning.
It is to rejoice in the success of others.
It’s hugging.
It’s not being afraid to do something wrong.
Video from Yana Shchastya: interview with professor of psychology N.I. Kozlov
Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be in order to successfully marry? How many times do men get married? Why are there so few normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A story that couldn’t be better. Paying for the opportunity to be close to a beautiful woman.