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Sapiosexuality is a term that describes the selection of partners on the basis of intellectual characteristics, not, for example, appearance. People who define themselves as sapiosexual primarily value the possibility of a lively, intellectual conversation, and put the wealth of their wallet or attractive appearance in further positions. Are you a sapiosexual person? Take the test and find out.
Sapiosexuality – what is it?
Sapiosexuality by definition means sexual attraction based on intellectual agreement. The term sapiosexuality was introduced a few years ago by one of the foreign dating sites. The term comes from the Latin word “sapio”, which means: I understand, I know, but I also taste and taste.
Sapiosexuality as a fashionable term for sexual preferences has its reasons also in the pop culture of recent years. In many popular series like «Dr. House »or« Breaking Bad », the image of above-average intelligent male heroes was created, whose intellectual qualities did not always go hand in hand with external qualities. This trend also applies to female characters – the slightly forgotten Ally McBeal did not fit into the current canons of beauty, and yet thanks to her intelligence and accurate retort, she became the ideal woman setting new trends.
Currently, female heroines are becoming icons, and they can be loved more for their intellect, sophisticated sense of humor or accurate observations than for their statuesque beauty. Suffice it to mention the series “Girls”, whose intelligent and mindful of their intellectual advantage have replaced the female characters from “Sex and the City” in the collective subconscious.
A sapiosexual person will go on a date with a well-read intellectual of dubious beauty rather than a hunk whose thoughts end up reflecting on the latest set of abdominal exercises. Sapiosexuals consider the intellect sexy, and this understanding at the level of their minds is the basis for their relationship formation.
See also: Pansexuality – What Is It?
Sapiosexuality and relationship building
Research shows that sapiosexuals are more likely to create lasting and successful relationships. It was not difficult to predict such a result – it is obvious that people who understand each other and have something to talk about will create a more lasting relationship than couples who decided about a common future based on sexual attraction. Beauty and desire pass away, intelligence – stays.
Sapiosexual people are also characterized by a great attraction to culture, developing passions and hobbies, which means that in such relationships it is never boring, and the topics for discussion are endless. For sapiosexual people, the most important thing is to stimulate the mind through conversation – thanks to conversation, sapiosexual couples avoid misunderstandings resulting from understatements, and the process of getting to know and discovering a partner again never ends.
Sapiosexual people are also characterized by a high level of empathy and emotional intelligence, which translates into a high level of understanding and compassion in a relationship.
See also: Expert on successful relationships. They depend on one detail
What traits in the other person attract sapiosexualists?
Sapiosexual people are not only turned on by their intelligence, but also by the ability to surprise, organize time together, move smoothly from topic to topic, or quickly associate facts.
Features that sapiosexuals appreciate include:
- emotional intelligence;
- extensive, interdisciplinary knowledge;
- the ability to conduct interesting conversations;
- smart wit;
- grammatical and stylistic correctness of statements;
- ability to behave appropriately in any situation;
- the ability to listen to the other side;
- having interests and extraordinary passions;
- above-average intelligence;
- the need to expand knowledge and train one’s skills.
However, attention should be paid to the fact that for sapiosexual people the necessary condition is not to have higher education or a university diploma. They value not only the knowledge gained at school or college, but also the “life” knowledge.
Sapiosexuality – Frequently Asked Questions
What’s the difference between sapiosexuality and just dating smart people?
While many people desire intelligent partners, sapiosexuality is much more focused on intelligence.
Don’t most people find intelligence attractive?
Yes, up to a point. A team of Australian researchers developed the Sapiosexual Questionnaire (SapioQ) to test whether people are sexually attracted to intelligence (which they defined with an IQ score) and whether they would like to have an intelligent partner as a partner. The researchers found that the participants appeared to be sexually and romantically attracted to people of above-average intelligence, for an IQ with a score of 120.
Above IQ with a score of 120, both sexual and partner interest dropped. Very high IQs were not seen as being particularly sexually attractive or the most desirable trait in a partner.
See also: Polish sexual mother
Why is sapiosexuality sometimes criticized as being able or elitist?
Some people believe that sapiosexuality devalues people with different mental abilities. Those who define it as elitist or Eurocentric say they overestimate Western education and IQ while ignoring other forms of intelligence. Defenders of sapiosexuality argue that it is based on relationship compliance, not an assessment of absolute value.
Sapiosexuality – a test
Check if you are a sapiosexual person. Consider which of the following statements you agree with and which clearly do not reflect your preferences.
- The conversation is more important to me than the appearance.
- I would never choose a discotheque on a date.
- Sex is important, but mutual understanding is more important.
- A person who does not read books is not my interviewee.
- A sharp retort is not a cause for offense, but for recognition.
- Beauty passes, intellect remains.
- Sex gets bored, lively discussion does not.
- Lack of interest testifies to poverty more than the wealth of the wallet.
- On a deserted island, I’d rather have a conversation partner than a sex partner.
- Understanding the other person is essential to a successful relationship.
See also: 10 books about sex and sexuality you should read
Test results
- If you agreed with up to 3 statements, sapiosexuality is definitely not an expression of your sexual preferences. You value some of the qualities of the intellect, but appearance and sexual communication are equally important to you.
- If you agreed with 3-5 statements, you are clearly showing sapiosexual tendencies, but not XNUMX% of your orientation.
- If you agreed with more than 5 statements, you are probably sapiosexual
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