Resilience Workshop IV: This is the attitude that really helps to overcome problems

Resilience Workshop IV: This is the attitude that really helps to overcome problems

Psychology

In this fourth installment of his Resilience Workshop, the psychologist Tomás Navarro teaches the readers of ABC Bienestar what is the attitude that, in the face of adversity, allows us to stop looking the other way, accept the challenge and face it knowing that it we can manage

Third installment: Ten steps to transform adversity into a challenge

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Life is what it is but depending on our attitude we can live very different lives. In the same way, adversity is what it is, but depending on our attitude we can manage it and overcome it or not. But what is attitude?

By attitude we mean the vital approach we take to life. When I talk about attitude I like to differentiate its two great areas of influence: our attitude determines how we interpret what happens to us and on the other hand also determines the answer that we give to what happens to us.

We can affirm that a certain attitude does not change reality at all, but it does give instructions to our mind about what we should attend to and what we should

 ignore reality and also decide how we should respond to what happens to us.

I like to assimilate the attitude to a kind of glasses that filter what we perceive, think, feel and do, that is, depending on the glasses we choose, we see life in one way or another.

We are going to analyze what happens in life with three different attitudes.

Life with a negative attitude

Let’s start with a negative attitude. A negative attitude does not change reality but it does filter it in such a way that we will have selective attention and we will emphasize and give more importance to everything that is in line with our attitude.

If our attitude is negative, we will feel less capable, more insecure and less competent to manage adversity, so we will remain mired in worry, anxiety or hopelessness.

Life with a positive attitude

A positive attitude is not very helpful either, since we will believe that a prince charming will appear that will save our lives. The positivism will leave us mired in a kind of inactivity, a sweet, sweetened wait that will make everything more complicated than necessary since time, by itself, never solves anything.

Life with a constructive attitude

The attitude of choice that I propose to be able to develop a resilient coping with adversity is a constructive attitude. A constructive attitude allows us to live reality with more intensity and fullness, it allows us to enrich our experience and offers us opportunities To enjoy life.

A constructive attitude also allows us to trust ourselves and our abilities and gives us the impetus to take action constructively in the face of adversity, without expectations of failure, taking an active role, without waiting for time to heal everything, knowing that we have in our hands the key to overcome adversity.

In summary, a negative attitude leaves us anchored in pain, complaint and guilt, a positive attitude leaves us anchored in waiting and inactivity and a constructive attitude puts us at the center of the problem and empowers us as agents of change and solution with the ability to understand, manage and face adversity.

A constructive attitude provides you with a more vital, open, receptive and trusting predisposition and will provide you with the necessary focus to learn from what happened, assimilate it and transfer it to similar situations so that you will not fall on the same stone again.

To have a certain attitude you do not need to do a master’s degree or learn anything special. Attitude is a choice, a vital approach, a way of seeing life and in relation to adversity a constructive attitude is the first step to stop looking away, accept the challenge and look at it head on, knowing that you can manage it.

Be ready to solve that adversity without delay, taking advantage of the time, expeditiously, the sooner the better, transforming it into a challenge, relying on your resources and seeking help when you need it.