The remorse and regrets are different: the former are linked to a feeling of guilt linked to a bad deed, while the latter do not include a moral notion.

Regret is a negative emotion that arises when a person thinks that things could have gone better if they had made a different decision (do or not do something. For example, “I should have worked better at school ”,“ I should have negotiated my starting salary better ”,“ I shouldn’t have spent so much on a car. ”Regret is accompanied by a feeling of guilt but without moral notion. 

Remorse contains a moral and social dimension that does not exist in regret. It is necessarily accompanied by a feeling of guilt linked to a bad deed. The regret for him can be limited to the simple grief of having done or not having done something, even if it is often tinged with guilt. The remorse has a strong moral dimension to it, which is characterized by the shame of having done something wrong in relation to social norms. There is an idea of ​​repentance, which one does not find in the context of regret. The person with remorse would like to erase the past. She may have to apologize because she feels guilty. 

Victor Hugo thus described remorse: “remorse is the crime embedded in the soul, which oxidizes”. 

There are two types of regrets. “The objects of regret can be errors of omission as well as of commission” wrote J. Landman in 1993. (1) This distinction is very important because regrets of action (regrets of commission) and inaction ( regrets of omission) are distinguished by their intensity and duration. Many studies have shown that decisions to act lead to more intense regret than decisions not to act.  

Regrets of inaction are more lasting. It has been shown that people cite actions they didn’t do more often than actions they did when expressing their biggest regrets in their life. 

(1)Landman J. (1993), Regret : the persistence of the possible, New York: Oxford University Press.

There is a well-known adage that it is better to have remorse than regret. This means that it is better to try things even if you regret it later than not to dare. This statement must be taken with a grain of salt because sometimes an action can lead to remorse, more painful than regrets! It is therefore better to weigh the consequences of a decision to be made. And also to remember that life without regrets is impossible and that regrets can teach us lessons for the future.