Reconcile at any cost: what to do if you had a fight and the partner does not make contact?

For some reason, many people believe that close people should understand each other intuitively, without words. It often happens that one of the partners is worried and nervous, but does not want to voice the problem and discuss it with the other half. In this case, resentment arises that the other does not provide support, does not pay attention and does not offer help.

Relationship conflicts – when you need them

Often one of the parties tries to avoid conflict and believes that it would be better to remain silent. Because of this, resentment accumulates inside us, which sooner or later turn into a big “snowball”. At some point, it leads to a major and severe scandal.

To avoid this, it is better not to accumulate everything in yourself, but to express claims to your partner. Showdown helps people strengthen the union. In the process of constructive dialogue, we can understand each other’s dissatisfaction.

When each of the partners tells what he does not like and what worries him, trust increases in a couple. The main thing is not to shout and not to scandal, namely, to talk calmly. Do not interrupt each other and impose your position.

What to do if one of the partners does not want to discuss the problem and go for reconciliation

In relationships, many of us “mirror” each other, unconsciously reflecting the behavior of the other. If it seems to you that the other half has recently become nervous and does not pay attention to you, take a look at yourself. Think about what has changed in you. In most cases, you can find the cause in yourself.

Self-education and work on mistakes will help to avoid protest from the partner and return harmony to the relationship. Literature on psychology and the implementation of relevant practices can come to the rescue. If you can’t work on yourself on your own, you can contact a psychotherapist.

If the partner refuses to put up, he may not be able to handle the anger, but is not able to tell you about his feelings. Many people have an internal psychological ban on expressing their own emotions and desires. Instead of speaking out, they just get offended and stop talking to their soulmate.

Such a person still needs to be talked to. Tell him about your experiences (for example, “it upsets me that you are silent”), and then take an interest in his emotions. It is desirable that the questions be open-ended: “What do you feel?”, “What are you upset about?”, “Why are you not talking to me?”.

This will help the partner open up and throw out everything that is in his soul. Here it is important to listen to exactly what he says, and not what he thinks (in your opinion).

How to find a common language and come to a compromise

There are several guidelines that will help you successfully resolve the conflict.

• Treat your partner with an open mind, do not judge or scold him. It is better to just listen carefully and kindly (as far as possible) to his point of view. If he does not make contact, start a conversation yourself. Let him know that you need to discuss the problem.
• State your claims clearly. Do not bring up other old grievances. Say only what you are unhappy with right now. If you increase the number of claims, the partner may feel completely guilty of all the problems of the couple.
• Hold back your emotions. The purpose of conflict is to solve the problem and strengthen relationships, not destroy them further. Therefore, there is no need to shout, insult and lash out with accusations. The dialogue should be structured like a conversation between two business partners who seek to establish contact.
• Be prepared that the partner will also talk about his claims. He has every right to do so. You can’t dismiss the accusations against you. Any dissatisfaction is justified. You need to immediately discuss this issue or transfer the conversation to another time when the situation is more suitable.
• Maintain tactile contact during a dialogue with your significant other: hold your partner by the hand, stroke your head, hug your shoulders … You can’t be angry with a loved one for a long time if he hugs and kisses you. Touch will help relieve tension and defuse the situation. The exchange of warmth and energy will contribute to the speedy reconciliation.

In every conflict, the most important thing is not to be afraid and not to avoid it, but to talk openly and honestly with each other about your emotions, feelings and grievances. It is important to be able to listen and hear the partner, to understand and accept his point of view.

Always remember that conflict is a stage in the development of a relationship. Passing through it, you can get closer to your soulmate even stronger.