What should a woman look like after childbirth? Do we have the right to stretch marks, fullness and other changes in the figure, or should we always stay fit and fight for girlish forms for the rest of our lives? Are we obligated to look “a million” at all costs, or do we still have the freedom of choice?
For years, society has imposed beauty standards and ideals on us to strive for. Those who did not fit into the canons were offered a whole range of options to at least get closer to them: fitness, plastic surgery, salon procedures, diets, and so on.
The development of social networks only contributed to the promotion of this trend: the emphasis on appearance and the general craving for “beautiful” increased, giving rise to even more complexes and self-doubt in women. Young mothers are in a particularly vulnerable position, whose body undergoes strong changes for natural reasons, requires careful attitude and time to recover after childbirth, and, what can we say, often does not fit into recognized standards.
A turning point in stereotypes was outlined in 1996 with the advent of the body-positive movement in America, which gradually reached Russia and continues to attract more and more supporters to its ranks today. Adherents of this ideology are sure that every person is beautiful from the very beginning, and his height, weight, figure parameters and skin color do not matter. The main thing is to love and accept yourself, to be in harmony with yourself and with the world around you.
A similar philosophy was close to the photographer Jade Bill, who was one of the first in 2012 to decide to show the female body after pregnancy and childbirth without retouching and without embellishment. The author shows with his works that natural motherhood is beautiful in itself and real mothers should not torment themselves, worrying about fullness, stretch marks or other changes in the figure (by the way, the project began with a self-portrait of Jade herself with her newborn son).
Many photos outraged – why do these women allow themselves to look like that? How can this be shown? But even more people have been incredibly inspired by the Beautiful Body photo project, because it helped them free themselves from the burden of shame. Fear, shame, silence and inaction are an explosive mixture from which the complexes draw strength. It is worth gaining courage and at least calling the complex by name – then it weakens and seems to be something ridiculous, ridiculous.
According to the philosopher Isabel Keval, author of the book “The Body Today”, these photographs give a feeling of authenticity, naturalness, closeness to nature. “Today, the body has become the central, defining element of the personality. We seek to control both nature and destiny. The times when people had to put up with the appearance that nature gave them are far behind. In the age of almighty plastic surgery, you can choose your body – improve it indefinitely. That’s why this black and white photo shocks someone, ”Isabelle comments.
But there is also a diametrically opposite approach, according to which the body is perceived as capital and imposes duties and responsibilities on us: we must look after it and keep it in shape for as long as possible. The living embodiment of this approach is Maria Kang, mother of three children and the owner of an impeccable athletic body. A photo of her with her children and the caption “What’s your excuse?” also sparked a heated discussion.
“She means that if my body is not so fit and beautiful, I should feel guilty? – outraged young mothers from all over the world on the Internet. “She must have a lot of money and free time to leave the children with a babysitter and hang around the fitness club all day!”
In fact, Maria does fitness at home, an hour a day. “I didn’t mean to offend anyone,” Maria says. “I just wanted to show new moms that if I can look this good after giving birth, then they can too. Our body is only our choice.” Everything would be fine, but this statement does not take into account the physique of women, which are genetically determined, as well as many other factors. After all, not all mothers can afford even an hour of free time a day: some children have to be monitored constantly, no one has canceled household chores, and each of us has an individual supply of energy. And it’s more of a matter of luck.
According to Isabelle Keval, both photos evoke strong emotions because they touch on the issue of freedom of choice: “How far can you get, putting a lot of incredible effort and time to look perfect? Isn’t it a real psychosis to devote your whole life to appearance, trying to look as slim and young as possible?
But on the other hand, if the desire for a toned and perfect body becomes the main goal and brings joy and pleasure to a woman, and also inspires someone, doesn’t such a position have a right to exist?
Of course, in life there are many more interesting and important things besides appearance and figure, and certainly the psychological and physical health of the mother and child unconditionally come first. But it’s nice to realize that today we live just at a time when no one asks how you should, and no one dictates how you should or should not look. And everyone makes her own choice. And that’s great.