Which force will win: the pursuit of creativity or the pursuit of perfection? The assumption of the psychotherapist Ekaterina Mikhailova.
“I write stories, I keep a diary. I understand that not everyone will make a Hemingway, but I’m sure: if I don’t create something great in my life, then all this is in vain … “
Sergey, 18 years
Ekaterina Mikhailova, psychotherapist:
“Sergey, you find yourself in a situation of internal conflict between two powerful forces: the desire for creativity and the desire for impeccability. It seems that while creativity is losing. I don’t know how the idea arose in your mind that the life of those who didn’t create “something great” is worthless. But this thought is dangerous with relapses and complications. Her captives cannot enjoy what they love and do well, because they devalue everything that is not “great”. As a result, it turns out that a person could draw, write, show tricks, but he does nothing of it, because he does not succeed ingeniously right away, and then what is all this for? Your inner critic seems to be quite a snob. It would be useful to understand where you picked up this attitude – then it is easier to transform it. It often turns out that the proud posture “if you don’t do it better than anyone else, quit, it’s not worth the trouble” protected one of your loved ones from experiencing failure and was unwittingly passed on “by inheritance” as a medicine. And here’s another interesting thing: your letter says a lot about mistakes, depreciation, even successful solutions are mentioned. That’s what it lacks, so it’s love for the subject. You don’t love your work – or, in any case, you don’t love it enough to respond to the poisonous “Well, what did you achieve?” answer to yourself: “It’s just that I like to do it.” But let’s hope for the best, all the best.”