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With the onset of the pandemic, our adult parents and grandparents found themselves in the most strict isolation. And they endure it the hardest of all – including because of the lack of habitual live communication with children and grandchildren and the inability to move freely around the city. What can be done to support them and make their lives more comfortable?
“Today we must be especially attentive to parents and other elderly family members who live separately. It is important to discuss with them any, even the most insignificant changes in their well-being. This will help to track the “malfunctions” in their body at a distance,” explains psychiatrist Lilia Solovieva. “Often older people do not want to disturb their children with their illnesses, but now it is extremely important not to miss the slightest detail. Fatigue, weakness, drowsiness – ask them about everything so as not to miss a sharp deterioration in the condition, cognitive decline or the onset of a serious illness.
If your relatives are over 65 years old and you understand in the process of communication that they do not tolerate isolation well, help them establish a clear daily routine, gently suggest starting to do gymnastics. Call several times a day to remind you to eat lunch or take your medication. Find out exactly what your relatives eat, make sure that the diet includes enough protein and fiber.
In general, try to call them twice as often as before, and be sure to find out if they communicate with friends and other relatives during the day.
It is important to create comfort for a loved one, to fill his life not just with communication, but with a sense of being needed by others.
“In old age, isolation from loved ones and deprivation of the usual social circle leads to depression, against which attention, memory can deteriorate, dementia can develop, which can significantly worsen the quality of life,” the expert continues. “To avoid this, you need to train the cognitive sphere.” Any new type of activity will help with this – drawing with a ballpoint pen, mosaic, modeling, puzzles, tongue twisters, writing with your left hand or making dumplings, walking through virtual museums.
“If memory weakens, it is difficult for a person to memorize new things and there is no motivation to do this, interest in the learning process is lost. In this case, it is important to listen to him, to let him tell what he already knows well, to praise.
But what about those who live in boarding houses and care homes? “Even the most sincere nurse will not replace relatives,” says Lilia Solovieva. – It is important to use all available means of communication in order to create comfort for your loved one, to fill his life not just with communication, but with a sense of being needed by others. For example, you can ask him to share proven recipes, and then be sure to show the result and thank you.”
We talked in detail about how the new reality will change our daily habits at the Psychologies webinar with Irina Nikulina, CEO of the Boiron company in Russia, and Olga Kochetkova-Korelova, practicing psychologist, content editor of the Psychologies project.
How to make life easier for elderly relatives: a checklist
1. Maintain physical health
Buy:
- A subscription to personal online training for the elderly (or you can use free resources on social networks Senior GroupOn YouTube or Telegram channels).
- A gentle treadmill or exercise bike (many older people cannot walk normally due to limited joint mobility).
- Fitness bracelet to measure the number of steps.
It is also important to make sure that there is a working thermometer, blood pressure monitor and scales at home, to replenish the first-aid kit.
Install:
- “Button of Life”so that in an emergency you can call an ambulance with one click.
- Application for measuring physical activity and heart rate. Most smartphones have a built-in pedometer – you can teach parents how to use it. The Instant Heart Rate apps will help you measure your heart rate (for iOS or Android), Pulsometer (for iOS or Android) and analogues. To do this, just put your finger on the camera of your smartphone.
Buy:
- A tablet or phone with a good, large screen is for better communication, including video calls.
Install:
- Team Viewerin order to quickly solve technical problems, Zoom for remote meetings.
You can also organize regular family calls with interactive entertainment: cooking classes, evenings of memories.
3. Development of the cognitive sphere
Buy:
- Sets for engaging in favorite or new hobbies (needlework, modeling, puzzles, solitaire card games, puzzles and home quests). If the relative is very old, educational games and simple puzzles from a children’s goods store are also suitable.
- Paid webinars or subscription to private online lessons – cooking courses or foreign language courses, the basics of calligraphy. You can also find free options: for example, drawing lessons are offered by the school “Artist online”, interesting recipes are posted on the website of the school of restaurants “Novikov group”, studio “Clever” regularly conducts master classes online.
Pick up:
- List of world museums with virtual tours of galleries: Pinacoteca Brera, Uffizi Gallery, Vatican Museums, Louvre, Prado, British museum и Metropolitan Museum. You can also explore collections Van Gogh Museum, Viennese Museum of Art History, New York Museum of Modern Art, Salvador Dali Museum, museum Guggenheim. In Russia they work online The Russian Museum, Hermitage, Tretyakov Gallery.
- Free online lessons to develop different skills – from sparing yoga to knitting courses.
4. Establishing a life
Buy
- A bread maker and slow cooker to cut down on cooking time and reduce the need to go to the store for fresh bread.
Also, teach your loved ones to use the delivery of products in a convenient network, create an account for them and save passwords in a convenient place.
About expert
Lilia Solovieva — psychiatrist, psychotherapist, head of the neuropsychiatric rehabilitation program in the network of Senior Group geriatric centers.