Contents
Make rules for the child
Enough is enough ! This time, Pitchoun will not escape the punishment. For the majority of parents, it is inevitable.
Punish, why not, but not without warning. Define the limits not to be exceeded ! The child must be warned that he will be sanctioned if, for example, he annoys his sister again or if he repeats bad words.
Dialogue with the child
» When my son does something wrong I usually send him in his room explaining why. He will calm down, think about it … and we discuss the incident again after “, Says Céline, the mother of Lukas, 4 and a half years old. All punishment must actually be accompanied explanations. Talk to your toddler about their reasons fordisobey, of those which oblige you to punish him… even if it means deciding the sentence together! You will notice that, strangely, children tend to self-administer sanctions more severe than those envisaged by their parents. One way for them to free themselves from guilt.
What punishment to give to a child?
For Didier Pleux, ”lhe most judicious sanction is that which has a link with the passage to the act. “ In other words, depriving a child of television because he spoke badly to his sister makes no sense! On the other hand, depriving him of television because he watches it instead of doing his homework can be a solution …
Forget about the punishments you won’t stand, » for example, telling a child that he will not go to winter sports because he has a bad school report! It is obvious that we cannot deprive the whole family of holidays that have already been planned for a long time … “
Above all, make sure that the punishment takes effect the same day. The little ones, in particular, do not fully understand the notion of the future. So avoid sanctions such as “no cinema this weekend”!
Example of educational punishments
Because they do not have the same maturity, all children cannot be punished in the same way… Isabelle found the solution: “QWhen I punish my elder, I make him take his pencil and talk about his stupidity in a few lines. When my 6 year old little one, I ask her to go see daddy and explain his stupidity to him! The fact of tell, I hope, makes her think «.
Isolation in the bedroom or in the hallway remains the easiest way to make a little one understand that he is acting badly. The older ones are capable of “fixing” their mistake: you can force him to put the table down for a week or to rewrite his lesson. If you choose deprivation, prefer the superfluous things over the essentials. In other words, deprive him of TV or video games rather than dessert or pocket money!
Arguments without remorse or grudges
Your toddler gives you a tearful look because you just punished him… don’t worry, he still loves you! ” It’s not easy, but you have to go to the end of the punishment despite the tears, do not change your mind … Like Sally, many parents feel guilty about scolding or punishing their offspring. Afraid of losing his love. Fear of not being forgiven.
The child is frustrated because he has been deprived of one of his favorite toys, because he has been forbidden to see his friends, because he has to stay in his room … Indeed he is angry with his parents, but it never lasts very long!
Knowing how to question yourself
Your toddler has taken out a punishment subscription! Lately he no longer obeys you. Ask yourself a few questions: have I been present enough? Does he need to get some fresh air to let off steam? Maybe we should share more one-on-one moments? There is a good chance that your child will all that nonsense to get your attention. Maybe take the time to talk to him rather than punish him right away …
Do you want to talk about it between parents? To give your opinion, to bring your testimony? We meet on https://forum.parents.fr.