When I started the practice, I often listened to the client for an hour until he told me everything about his life, about all his personal failures and numerous problems. I soon realized that these streams of complaints have very little to do with what the client actually came with, and practically does not help me in any way so that I can help my client … Of course, you can cynically rejoice that time is passing and money is flowing, but if you think about the matter, then the consultation should be different.
What is it? And I began to pay attention to how doctors work. Doctors also help people, but in a different way.
When my children get sick, I call the pediatrician. During the demi-season, when an epidemic of respiratory diseases begins, he receives up to 30 house calls daily. It’s interesting to watch him work. The whole visit takes 5-7 minutes. During this time, the doctor manages to come in, take off his outer clothing, put on shoe covers, wash his hands, examine the child, prescribe treatment, get dressed and leave.
Actually, the inspection itself and the discharge of treatment takes 3-4 minutes.
If a psychologist tries that way, it will be judged as… as something strange… That’s not accepted. It is accepted that a counseling psychologist should listen to a detailed confession of a client, and a psychotherapist, in addition to this, is obliged to go not only in breadth, but also in depth, to look for the reasons for what is happening with the client. This may take several years.
If our pediatrician worked like this, how many examinations would he be able to do in a day? If you came to everyone with the entire history of the child’s illnesses? I think that he could do 3-4 visits at best.
It is clear that the world of the soul is very wide and varied, but our physical body is also an immensely complex structure. Until now, in practical medicine, there are many questions about how to treat certain diseases. However, for the most common diseases, a qualified pediatrician will be able to identify and prescribe treatment without fully familiarizing themselves with the entire medical history of the child. And I asked myself a question: does a psychologist really need to listen to the client “from and to” every time? Does every psychological consultation need to dive deep into the client’s problems?
As at least my practice shows, the main request of the psychologist’s clients is: “I don’t know what to do with everything that is happening in my life.” And here the fastest and most effective way to help a person (one might say, a magic pill) is not to support the flow of complaints, but to transfer the client to the position of the Author from the first minutes of the conversation. What would such a consultation look like? To a substantive business conversation, so characteristic of the synton approach. The client starts to complain, the psychologist quickly switches the client to “What would you like? What do you expect to get as a result of the consultation? Not every client then proceeds to business, the majority continues lengthy stories, but the consultant stops him:
“Get a pen, write it down. I’m ready/ready to dictate what you need to do now. I have a question for you: will you do it? I will give you my recommendations when you tell me how much time and effort you are willing to spend on their implementation.
Of course, the work of a psychologist is different from the work of a pediatrician. If we return to the analogy with a visit to a pediatrician, then the latter does not bother about whether it is necessary to take an obligation from the patient regarding the fulfillment of his prescriptions. A pediatrician can afford this, he knows that he will buy pills and rinse his mouth (most likely). We, psychologists, do not yet have such authority, and because of this, we can and must definitely clarify whether the client is ready to follow our recommendations. This is all the more important because making a commitment is a great way to motivate a client to take action, to work. And to make sure that the client really understood my recommendations, and not only understood, but they suit him, and not only suit him, but he really wants to fulfill them and will be able to fulfill them — I won’t regret this time. This is really important!
Now, when I began to work in a more directive manner, began to direct the client more in the right direction and focused on making my recommendations relevant and effective for the client, the effectiveness of my work as a consultant has become higher. Thanks to the University and my teachers!