In her memoirs, the famous pianist talks about personal and important things — first of all, about the harshness of her father, who sought to make a celebrity out of his daughter. Music lovers will be interested to know what complex programs a six-year-old girl learned; parents will be able to once again think about whether it is necessary to develop “hidden reserves” in the child; and young readers will get a vivid example of successfully resisting external pressure. In the book of Osetinskaya there is a fascinating intrigue and a piercing intonation, which sounds most clearly in Polina’s life credo: «You must search in yourself and above, and not on the side and under your feet.» We asked the pianist a few questions.
Psychologies: What goals did you set for yourself when you started writing the book?
Polina Osetinskaya: None at first.
I decided to just try to write. Already in the process, I realized that in fact I strive to put into words my deepest emotions — first of all, in order to better understand myself, in my own attitude to the past. Thus, the work on the book became for me a kind of «literary therapy», although the understanding of this did not come immediately, but gradually. If someone had told me about this earlier, I would have treated my task more responsibly — for example, I would have tried, re-experiencing some state, to live it with a different emotion, to change the negative to the positive. But even though I acted not completely consciously, the book helped me a lot in understanding myself — I understood a lot and forgave many.
Your childhood and youth can hardly be called happy…
From what? They cannot be called happy in the usual, childish sense, but on the other hand, they had so many truly brilliant moments and priceless impressions, as few people get in a lifetime. And this is not my merit, but just a fare.
Looking back at the past years, are you satisfied with the way your fate has turned out?
Undoubtedly. I wouldn’t choose another for myself — unless I would change some details.
Summing up a certain life stage, how do you see your future?
Family, music, inner peace.