From the Greek “philo” which means “love” and phobos for “fear”, philophobia is literally, the fear of falling in love. While it may be an anxiety at the idea of ​​loving globally, this anxiety disorder is most often linked to a fear of commitment and romantic feelings. 

An attachment disorder disabling for the personal life of the one who suffers from it, forcing him to put in place defense mechanisms to guard against all forms of feelings of affection. Find in this article all our explanations and our advice to face the fear of being in love and to cross the course which will allow you to be fulfilled and happy in love.

Philophobia is the panic fear of feeling love for others, and more generally of engaging in a sentimental relationship. 

Love causes you a feeling of well-being and intense excitement? In a philophobic person, it is more of a trigger for paralyzing anxiety attacks. He will be unable to let himself go in loving a person. A suffering which represents a brake on a healthy and fulfilling couple life.

Several traumatic events, occurring during childhood or adulthood can explain this anxiety disorder and the inability to develop intimate relationships, such as: 

• Parents’ divorce: it can leave a negative image of the couple that we do not want to reproduce, to the point of developing an aversion to any feeling of love; 
• The loss of a loved one: the pain is immense to the point of preferring to guard against any feeling in order to guard against new suffering;
• A breakup that left deep inner wounds;
• And many more

The manifestations of this anxiety disorder vary from one individual to another. Among the most common are: 

• Violent panic and anxiety attacks;
• Significant anxiety linked to the fear of commitment: nausea, tremors, increased heart rate, etc. ;
• A marked detachment towards those close to them; 
• An inability to open up to others;
• And many more

A person suffering from philophobia, steeped in negative thoughts and anxiety, would rather focus on the slightest flaw in their partner rather than take the risk of falling in love. For fear of abandonment or breakup, some people prefer to avoid any form of relationship, going so far as to convince themselves that they are incapable of loving.

Flight or argument for fear of loving?

For those who dare to take the plunge, one of the most common mechanisms is to provoke arguments and conflicts in order to push the other to end the relationship, especially when it becomes serious. A parade which will most often lead to an escape from the philophobic person.

To find a peaceful life and be able to start a serene romantic relationship, therapy can be an effective way to cope with your feelings.

There are different natural solutions to deal with this situation, such as:

• Cognitive therapy will help to understand the mental process which pushes to put at distance all signs of affection and more specifically the feelings of love. The therapist will accompany the philophobe in the discovery and modification of his thought patterns;
• Affective desensitization therapy: placed in a situation facing their phobia, the patient may have to simulate interactions in order to overcome their phobia; 
• Hypnosis: it will bring the patient, in a modified state of consciousness, to perceive things from a new angle.