Children are the flowers of life. Children are happiness and joy. Children … If such auto-training does not help you anymore, try reading what other parents write – at least to make sure that you are not alone.
Our children sometimes surprise, sometimes touch, and sometimes just shock. We do not always understand their words, in some ways we are hopelessly behind the younger generation. But sometimes we manage to impress them. 25 funny tweets in which parents talk about themselves and about their children.
1. “I took out the batteries from the remote control, knocked on each other, put it back in – and the remote control worked. The son looks at me as a deity.
2. “I am a strong and independent woman. I am flint. No one in the whole world can make me cry, sob from despair and impotence. Nobody but a second grader with whom you have to do your math homework.”
3. “I know this is not easy for many of you right now. You are ready to tear your hair out, bang your head against the wall. Know that one day this will end. One day your child will learn to do it himself. Tie shoelaces. One day…”
4. “I grew up with Indian mythology. Well, all the demons, the murders, the brutality. And now I protect my child from Peppa Pig.
5. “Convinced the kids that they were hypnotizing me while playing catch-up, and now it’s their favorite game. I lie down on the carpet and sleep sweetly for 10 minutes, and they walk around me on tiptoe, because otherwise “the spell will break.” Adore. My greatest achievement as a parent.”
6. “Let’s face it already: dust jackets on children’s books are a waste of money.”
7. “I heard my 7-year-old daughter say: “No, not there!” to his father loading the dishwasher. I’m proud of myself to the point of disgrace.”
8. “I started telling the children: “If I find it, I’ll keep it for myself!” — when they asked me to help them find something. Surprisingly, things somehow immediately ceased to be lost.
9. “Daughter:“ How I wish I could talk to animals! I would ask them so many questions!” Yes, that’s what she’s doing now: asking questions. Constantly”.
10. “My teenage daughter is preparing breakfast. 87 dirty plates later, we have 11 pancakes.”
11. “Parenthood is not a test, but rather an endless series of puzzles that come from nowhere, appear in front of you at any moment, for which you can never be ready, and how to solve them is also unclear.”
12. “The son did not let me try his hamburger, and when asked why, without batting an eye, he explained: “Coronavirus”.”
13. “I wrote to the teacher, but she did not answer,” is a modern variation on the theme “the dog ate my homework.”
14. “I asked my three-year-old nephew if he goes to work, he looked at me with contempt, cut off:“ No, I eat and play! – and proudly retired to the nursery.
15. “Want the kids to stay away from the fridge? Hang your picture on it.”
16. “Does your child also turn into the Hulk if you don’t let him press a button?”
17. “Be kind to everyone you meet. You don’t know how much time they have to spend locked up with their families.”
18. “My child: “Listen, mom …” My wife: “God, what else ?!” Child: “It doesn’t matter, I’ll ask ‘Alice’. Hello, Alice … “Alice”: “God, what else ?!”
19. “There were 15 cookies in a pack, and in order for all four of my children to get an equal share, I had to eat 11 cookies.”
20. “I don’t want to say at all that everything must be done for the child and if you ask him to help, it will only get worse, but today, for example, I asked my four-year-old son to clean his dirty shoes, and you know what? He cleaned. Toothbrush.”
21. “My child: “Which would you choose – the ability to turn invisible or be able to fly?” Me: “Become invisible.” “To fight the villains and defeat everyone?” “To climb into the store and eat all the delicacies I want.”
22. “My 6-year-old: “A doctor should never tell a patient that he is going to die. It is necessary to say “you are not a tenant” or “your business is a pipe”. I hope he goes to the medical profession.”
23. “I slept like a baby last night! I woke up every two hours…”
24. “You have no right to command me! You are not my three-year-old…”
25. “Three words that we are all afraid to hear from a child one day: “I googled you.”