PSYchology

Dietrich Bonhoeffer is one of the most famous theologians of the XNUMXth century, a man of extraordinary personal courage, an active anti-fascist, who was executed in a German concentration camp shortly before the end of the war. Here are excerpts from his prison letters to freedom.

1. Despising people, we indulge in just the main vice of our opponents … Nothing that we despise in others is alien to us. How often do we expect more from others than we ourselves are ready to do … We must learn to evaluate a person not by what he did or missed, but by what he suffered. The only fruitful attitude towards people (and, above all, a weak one) will be love, that is, the desire to maintain communion with them.

2. It is immeasurably easier to suffer in obedience to a human command than in committing an act, making a free choice, taking responsibility. It is incomparably easier to suffer in a group than alone. Infinitely easier is an honorable suffering in the sight of all, than torment in obscurity and shame.

3. A very strange feeling when absolutely everything depends on the help of others. But, in any case, in such times one learns gratitude, and this, I hope, will not be forgotten. In a normal life, it often does not even occur to a person that you take incomparably more than you give, that only gratitude makes life rich. Perhaps it is too easy to overestimate the importance of your deeds and your influence compared to what influenced you and made you who you are … The desire to achieve only on your own is false pride.

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4. Here, in prison, sometimes a terrifying longing took possession of me … I wanted to write about my experience. Maybe it will come in handy. The first consequence of this melancholy is always the desire to neglect the normal course of the day in any way, that is, some kind of disorder tends to creep into our lives. I was sometimes tempted not to get up as usual at six in the morning — which would have been quite possible — but to sleep longer. It is clear to me that this would be the beginning of surrender … The external, purely physical order (morning exercises, rubbing with cold water) provides some kind of support for the internal. Further: there is nothing more absurd than in days like this to try to find a replacement for the irreplaceable. Still nothing comes of it. Forces are undermined, and the situation becomes even more unbearable. Further: I think that it is better not to talk about your condition with strangers — this will open up the wound even more, but if possible, you should open up to the troubles of other people. First of all… you can’t feel sorry for yourself.

5. Nothing can compensate for the absence of a person dear to us, there is nothing even to try; you just need to try to endure and endure everything; it sounds very cruel at first, but at the same time there is consolation in this, because if the emptiness remains unfilled, people find themselves bound by it with each other … The more beautiful and fuller the memories, the harder it is to part. But the feeling of gratitude transforms the torment of the memory into a quiet joy. What was beautiful in the past, you carry in yourself not as a thorn, but as a precious gift. One must beware of sorting through memories, surrendering to them, but simply possessing them as a treasure in which one can be sure — then unceasing joy and strength come from the past.

6. Survivors of the bombing came to me in the morning to find some solace. But I think I’m a bad comforter. I can still listen, but to say something is almost beyond my powers. It seems to me more important if this or that misfortune is really experienced, without any blurring and retouching.

7. There are few people who know how to appreciate isolation. If a person is closed, then it is very important here what he has closed in himself, but it is also important that there is also such a person before whom one could fully open up.

8. We have lived too long relying on the ability to provide any business by weighing all the options so much that then it happens by itself. Later, we learned that at the origin of the case lies not a thought, but a willingness to take responsibility. You will begin to think only about what you can take responsibility for by doing an act.

9. The essence and advantage of strong personalities is that they can pose great fundamental questions and clearly formulate their position in relation to them. The weak are always forced to choose between alternatives not offered by them.

10. There is hardly a feeling that gives more joy than the feeling that you can bring some benefit to people. At the same time, the main thing is not at all in quantity, but in intensity. After all, it is human relationships that are the most important thing in life. So, however, only one who has found people in his life can speak. For many people, after all, is perceived only as part of the world of things. This stems from the fact that the experience of the human is simply not available to them. We should be happy that we have been richly endowed with this experience in our lives.

For more details, see D. Bonhoeffer «Resistance and Submission» (Progress, 1994).

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