On the first night after returning from the sanatorium, I dreamed of rows of rubbish bins filled with empty «monkeys»

While visits to sanatoriums are very popular, they often aim not so much to recover as to have fun. Mr. Marek from Sieradz told about his experiences. «Patients drank for a curage before dancing evenings, for pleasure or simply out of boredom …»

1. Mr. Marek from Sieradz was referred to a sanatorium from the Social Insurance Institution – on the first day he noticed that the most crowded place in the area was a smoking room, called the “Crayfish can”
2. He could buy alcohol in four places around the center or in a nearby store, which was reached after At 18 there was a long queue
3. During a few weeks of stay, patients can spend over 10 zlotys on dance evenings and drinks

Patients return to sanatoriums. At the end of 2021, there were 258 spa treatment facilities, which received 599,9 thousand visitors during the year. patients. This is much less than before the pandemic (e.g. in 2018, 838,5 thousand patients benefited from spa treatment facilities), but by as much as 35 percent. more than in 2020. We remind you of the archival text of Monika Zieleniewska, which appeared on the Medonet website on November 25, 2019.

According to data from the Central Statistical Office of Poland, at the end of 2018, 271 spa treatment establishments conducted medical activity in Poland, which received 838,5 thousand visits during the year. patients, including 759,8 thous. treated stationary (3,5% more than in 2017). Women accounted for 60,6 percent. inpatient patients, while people aged 65 and more – 47,3%. The average stay of a patient in residential care was 16,4 days.

Sanatorium treatment enjoys unflagging popularity with us, which cannot be harmed either by partial payment under the National Health Fund, or even by regulations introduced by the Ministry of Health, which practically limit the number of visits to spa treatment to one per year. Full-time patients are worried, while those who did not have the chance to test the salutary effects of such a trip on their own bodies are happy. Because how can you not believe that the daily treatments associated with a stay in the bosom of nature in good company will not become a panacea for all ailments of the body and even the spirit?

It was with this attitude that Marek (60) from Sieradz came to the well-known spa town. A few months earlier, he had a heart attack and was sent there for rehabilitation by the Social Insurance Institution (ZUS), so he did not have to pay anything for a 24-day stay, including travel.

The health resort he visited was privatized a few years ago. The new owner built a large hotel and treatment facility, carefully renovated the old sanatorium buildings, and took care of a small park. Right from the spa complex you can go for long walks to the surrounding forest.

Already at the entrance to the sanatorium, the signs informing about a ban on smoking outside of designated areas. In fact, in the park alleys we will not meet greedy puffs. All addicts politely run to the local smoking room, called in the sanatorium slang “Crayfish can” or “Inhalatorium”. On the first day of our stay, Marek found out that it is the most crowded place in the area.

The decisive influence on this state of affairs is probably the handwritten signature of each patient, confirming that he has learned about the amount of penalties for nicotine insubordination. According to the regulations, smoking on the balcony or in the room would cost him PLN 500; if the smoke detector is triggered, you have to pay PLN 1000, and if the fire brigade arrives, the penalty increases to PLN 10. Anyway, the relevant entries can also be found in the patient’s ABC printed on chalk paper, located in each room. Smoking is also forbidden in restaurants, pubs and bars located in the sanatorium.

It is much less restrictive with the “percentages”. During the registration of the stay, no one mentioned alcohol to Mr. Marek. Quiet at night and cleanliness were talked about, but nothing about drinking. In the ABC of the patient there is information that it is forbidden to consume alcohol, but it has been added that … it does not apply to commercial guests who cover the costs of their stay and treatment in one hundred percent out of their own pocket. The latter ones were easy to distinguish by the color of the plastic bracelets that are put on everyone on arrival.

Mr. Marek is not a fan of percentages, but if he was, he would be pleased that in the spa area, you can drink in as many as four different places.

Firstly, in the main hall, right at the entrance to the dining room, in a well-stocked minibar; here, in addition to coffee from the machine, whiskey was served for PLN 90 per 100 ml. Secondly, the restaurant in the second wing of the building offered not only commercial meals, but also a wide range of alcoholic beverages. You could also go for a drink or a beer in a small pub located next to the bowling alley or in a pub. Prices, well, you live once… Beer from PLN 7 upwards, and drinks: small (50 ml of vodka) – PLN 10, large (100 ml of vodka) – PLN 16. However, the hit of the place turned out to be a set of half-liter Soplica plus a bottle of Sprite for only … PLN 95.

No wonder that the local alcohol was taken only at the beginning of the stay, and that among people in extraordinary sanatoriums. The more informed ones preferred to stock up in a shop 150 m away (and the only one in the vicinity). There, the “monkeys” cost from 5 to 12 zlotys, so by adding a little soda you could treat yourself to an equally strong, but much cheaper kick.

This method is effective before going to one of the many dance or karaoke evenings organized on the spot, the dates of which were signaled by the repeatedly twisted queue, forming in the store just after 18.

Patients drank for treatment before dancing evenings, for pleasure or simply out of boredom … Marek, as a teetotaler, was left with high-paying television – PLN 60 for the opportunity to watch digital terrestrial television and long walks in the forest, if the weather was favorable.

Regular visitors, learning from previous treatment stays, brought their own supplies. 45-year-old Piotr from Lower Silesia, for whom a stay with Mr. Marek was the fourth recently, packed a dozen bottles of vodka in the trunk of his Vectra, in addition to a large briefcase. Peter has a serious respiratory disease, but as the saying goes, whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Unfortunately, the stock of interest brought from home did not save him from spending, because it turned out to be far too small.

He would invite virtually everyone who came to the table at which he resided during the evenings, and it was not difficult to find him. The hallmark was 40 bottles of beer. As the evening unfolded, Peter became more sociable and generous. And at the end of the event, even the Soplica road was driving onto the table. At the “Inhalatorium” he complained at the end of his stay that in 3 weeks he spent almost 12 zlotys on dance evenings and drinks! Thus, he outbid Patryk from Ruda Śląska (40), who sold only 6. Not to mention Adam from the vicinity of Płock (46), who summed up his 24-day stay only at 3,5. The latter admitted that most of the money went to dance evenings, “monkeys” and drinks, because he only spent a hundred on cigarettes. Adam was really proud of the fact that he smoked much less while on treatment than at home. Besides, after removing the tumor, the doctors gave him five years to live, and he has already lived three years, so you shouldn’t regret it …

Nobody from the service did not mind that he was selling alcohol, even to a highly tipsy company. The more ignored the color of the bracelets, clearly indicating that they are not commercial guests. Rule yourself, and practice yourself – the spa paradox.

And Mr. Marek quickly adapted to him. Just like the view of patients staggering through the sanatorium corridors.

“One evening, my roommate came back from the evening in a strongly ingested condition,” she recalls. He only managed to take off his shoes and put on his pajama bottoms before collapsing on the bed. Somewhere around two o’clock he suddenly woke up, sprang to his feet and went out into the corridor. The door slammed shut, and his magnetic card was of course left in the room. As he later told me, he recovered a bit outside the nurse’s office, but that was where his memory failed him: there was no way he could remember the number of the room he had been living in for over two weeks. To the surprised nurse, he was also unable to explain why he had a slipper on one leg and a lace-up shoe on the other. Eventually, the nurse found his room on the list, and the security guard escorted him to the scene and opened the door with a universal card. The smell of alcohol that Mr. Adam spread around him, nobody even mentioned.

Mark’s roommate spent the next day in bed, struggling with the hangover. Instead of treatments, he only went for parcels on the patient’s card. It was not an isolated incident because for many patients, the treatment ended with collecting autographs. As you can easily guess, the spa staff do not want to speak about collecting signatures instead of participating in classes. Nobody investigates the reasons for absenteeism, and they prefer not to talk about the possibility of buying alcohol in the sanatorium. They unofficially admit that the facility is private, so the owner can sell whatever he wants there, and the visitors are adults and know what they are doing. One of the physiotherapists adds that he cannot force him to participate in gymnastics.

The staff cleans the spa rooms twice a week. This was also the case on the day of discharge. This picture remained in Mr. Marek’s mind: the cleaning lady pours the contents of the baskets into large plastic bags. The room is the same, bags end up with a few empty bottles, most of them “monkeys”. And cleaning on each floor is accompanied by the same clink of empty glass …