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Born very premature, my little boy is in great shape today
From my sixth month of pregnancy, I started having contractions and the doctor told me to lie down as much as possible. It was not easy, but I did as he asked me. And then, one evening, around 19 p.m., I started having fairly strong and regular contractions, and I lost my water. From that moment, it was the start of the fight to go to the hospital. Fortunately, my husband was at home and he took me to the maternity hospital very quickly. I was dying of fear of giving birth in the car!
For more security, I was given a cesarean. After my baby was born, the midwife told me, “ He is very small, we immediately take him to intensive care. She showed it to me from afar and, with my husband, we found ourselves alone. I was completely helpless and panicked that something was happening to my child. We had to wait a long time before we found out what was going on. Finally, a doctor came to tell us that our baby was born really small, low in weight and in need of care.
I thought my heart was going to stop. I dared not ask what was the vital prognosis. Fortunately, he anticipated my question by telling us that our baby was not in danger, but that we had to remain very vigilant. I was able to see my little Lucas the next day. He was in the intensive care unit because he was not breathing well on his own. I was afraid to approach the incubator because I knew it would be lined with a pile of pipes. I stepped forward very slowly and I really saw my little guy for the first time. I of course saw the “pipes” which invaded his body but, immediately, I found him very beautiful… However, he was tiny, his eyes closed. I was very moved when I saw his tiny hands move very slightly. A nurse told us that we could reach out and stroke her skin. I was very afraid to touch him for fear of hurting him, but my husband took me by the shoulders and very tenderly urged me to do so. I put one hand up to touch one of his and found my son very soft. I then spent a long time caressing him and saying words of love to him. He had several IVs and a lot of other things. But that didn’t matter to me since contact was made with my baby.
Then we had to leave him and it tore my heart. I didn’t get much sleep the next night. The next day, as soon as I could, I went to see my little boy again. More than the day before, I found him so small, lost in his incubator. A machine beeped constantly and that stressed me enormously. I was unable to take my eyes off my baby, but I couldn’t ignore the probes and pipes that connected him to life. It hurt me for him. The nurses might explain to me that he was not in pain, I had difficulty believing them. After a few days, the nursing staff suggested that I take my baby against me, for a “skin to skin”. But I was worried about dropping it, because I felt pain with the scar from the cesarean section. Fortunately, my husband once again encouraged me and gave me confidence. When my baby curled up against me, it was an emotional moment. I had tears in my eyes… Every day I held it against my heart and felt like nothing existed in the world anymore… However, an alert scared me: my baby suffered from an infection, and there, I was no longer allowed to take him out of his incubator. It went on for a few days and I spent my time crying! Then everything is back to normal. Gradually, he regained his strength and was able to breathe on his own. I could not wait to take her home with me.
The big day is finally here. After just under two months of hospitalization, Lucas was released. Even though he was still small, he was eating well, all his vital functions were intact and he just had to wait for him to catch up. At first, at home, I couldn’t help brooding: I got up several times at night to see if he was breathing well, if he had a little cold, I rushed to the doctor… He walked at 16 months, which is not too bad. I was so proud of him when he took his first steps ! The maternity doctors had warned me that he would probably be stunted, but that he would make up for it over time. At about 2 years old, it was done, much to my relief. Today, he loves going to school, is very social and has lots of friends. The only after-effect, if we can put it that way, is his clumsiness when he runs or plays ball games. But he sees a psychomotor therapist to make him feel more comfortable in his body. It was all a great and beautiful adventure, which fortunately ended well. Today, from the height of his 5 years, no one can guess that he was born so small. He is even rather strong for his age! My husband and I, we wonder if we are not going to start a little second. Lucas will be a great big brother, I’m sure …
QUOTES COLLECTED BY GISÈLE GINSBERG