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In a few days, we will have to entrust our 18 month old baby to another childminder, because her former nanny has just moved. We ask ourselves: “will he succeed in adapting to this new person?” How can we best prepare our little one for this change? “According to psychologist Suzy Tuduri *, all you have to do is” trust your baby by letting him take his marks quietly and ensuring that he finds his bearings “.
Change of nanny: we focus on our benchmarks and adaptation
Changing nanny means that our child has already gone through the separation phase: he knows he is looked after during the day and that his parents will come and pick him up when he leaves work. Despite everything, at first, he risks crying, losing his appetite a little, not understanding… Hence the importance of surrounding him with landmarks such as his blanket, his pacifier or his favorite toy. At mealtimes, we also favor the food that he is used to eating in order to prevent him from sulking his plate. The adaptation phase is of course also essential. Usually extended over a week or two, it will allow the baby to slowly take possession of his new environment, first with the parent who accompanies him, then by letting him spend a few hours face to face with the maternal assistant. These first links should be established gradually, gently. This is important for the future of the relationship between the child and his nanny!
Change of nanny: we remain confident
To help the child adapt, we take care not to get caught up in the stress caused by this change … in order to avoid passing it on to him! Seeing his mother relaxed, confident in the idea that he will be looked after by this nanny will seem much more reassuring to him, and will allow him to deploy the great capacities of adaptation which children are naturally endowed with.
Do we have the impression that something is wrong? In this case, we make an appointment with a shrink with the baby to help us find the source of the problem and solve it.
We establish a quality dialogue
The guilt that parents often feel, forced to leave their child to look after, can also lead them to misinterpret his behavior. So, if the child breaks down in tears or refuses to leave when they come to pick him up, it doesn’t mean that he is mad at us or that he has had a bad day: he may just be feeling good there. , and does not want to change environment on the spot. And the best way to find out about the well-being of our child is still to maintain a daily dialogue with the childminder, that she can tell us what is going, and possibly what is wrong. Finally, we do not hesitate to ask him to send us pictures of our child when he is having fun: seeing his smile should quickly reassure us!
Author: Dorothée Louessard