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Angry at failure: a sign of frustration
Every time our Loulou makes a mistake when he recites his poetry for example, he gets angry and wants to start over from the beginning, with a lot of anger. When he writes a sentence dictated by the teacher and he makes a mistake, his reaction is just as excessive. He crosses out, with a great gesture of annoyance, and throws his notebook down. Faced with a puzzle? The same sign of annoyance when he cannot find the right place for a room. Our Loulou is frustrated, that’s all!
We accompany him without solving his problem
“It is quite normal that between 6 and 8 years old, a child gets angry when the result does not meet the goal he set for himself. Especially since at that age, his motor functions are not necessarily in line with his expectations when he performs a creative exercise ”, relativizes David Alzieu, clinical psychologist and psychotherapist *. To us, this situation may seem anecdotal. “But for him, that represents his entire life. He does not understand when he is told that it is not serious, because yes, it is serious! To keep him confident in his abilities,The idea is to support our child by showing him that we understand what he is feeling. “Do not hesitate to ask him if he needs help without providing him with a solution, which would be even more likely to annoy him”, explains David Alzieu.
He puts pressure on himself: we stay calm
So nothing to worry about if this attitude is fleeting and not intrusive. “It sometimes happens that this hides a deeper discomfort that the child cannot express otherwise. It can be symptomatic of stress, of something that the child interprets as a particular requirement of parents or of the school “, notes the clinical psychologist before adding:” Children grow up mirroring their elders. If they see their parents getting upset when they can’t solve a problem, they may tend to pressure themselves on their own. “. No need to feel guilty for all that. But good
to temper. “You have to stay calm,” insists the clinical psychologist. And we show ourselves to listen to our child.
“When a child is frustrated and has trouble staying calm, you have to be vigilant about your sugar consumption. Added sugars tend to amplify emotions. They provide at first
mood stimulation. But they act like a drug. In the long run, they lower mood and affect emotions. ” Explain David Alzieu, clinical psychologist and psychotherapist *
(*) Author of “The 10 hidden qualities of our most sensitive children”, published by Jouvence