Common truths, old misconceptions and new standards of sexuality are so mixed up in our minds that we often find ourselves at a loss. What excites men and what women like? Let’s explore the most common stereotypes about sexuality.
Sexuality is often referred to as the «alchemy of the body.» But it is also the alchemy of words. Words that are passed on in secret and uttered during intimacy, but which can sometimes be seen on the pages of a magazine, heard from a television screen or from specialists.
Sexologists and psychoanalysts are unanimous: it is necessary to talk about what previously belonged to the area of the forbidden. But they also draw our attention to the dangers that may lie in wait here. How to understand the flow of information?
To begin with, it would be good to study the most common stereotypes regarding male and female sexuality.
Read the statements below and consider: Do you agree with them? Or is there something that makes you feel repulsed? What do you think: which of these beliefs belong to men, and which were born in the circle of women?
All these stereotypes can be discussed with a partner: a frank conversation will help you better understand each other. Such conversations allow couples to reach a new level of intimacy.
Yes or no?
- To make love, a woman needs to love, but a man does not.
- A man needs to make love often, and it’s easier for a woman to do without it.
- A man is turned on by details, a woman is turned on by the whole.
- A woman fantasizes about rape, a man fantasizes about threesome love.
- With every ejaculation, a man experiences an orgasm.
- A woman, unlike a man, can have sex all her life.
- A man is biologically more polygamous than a woman.
- A woman, unlike a man, can experience an orgasm an infinite number of times.
- The female orgasm is ten times stronger than the male.
- A man likes it when his penis is caressed; a woman loves to be caressed everywhere.
- A woman needs foreplay more than a man.
- During intimacy, men prefer harsh words, while women prefer gentle ones.
- Women don’t ejaculate.
- A man becomes satiated and cools faster towards his partner than a woman towards her partner.
Alain Eril, sexologist and psychoanalyst
“Sexual attraction lives only if the partners ask themselves questions after many years: “Why did I choose you? Why did you choose me?» If the other seems understandable from A to Z, how can he remain a mystery? And what will the attraction then feed on? Attraction needs mystery, vulnerability, the desire to know the other.”
Mireille Bonierbal, sexologist
“Get to know each other better so that you can surprise each other more often,” that might be the motto of those who are not satisfied with mechanical sex. The playful dimension of sexuality is extremely important. And the game means that in the meeting of two there can be moments of ups and downs, ecstasy and just pleasure. We must agree with how the part of our nature that is beyond our control expresses itself.”