Major Payne: male upbringing

I want to dwell in more detail on watching the film «Major Payne». And most importantly, on the comments of Nikolai Ivanovich to this film. As a teacher by education, and as a grandmother by the state of my soul, this topic was very interesting to me.

The film itself is light, funny, entertaining, which can be watched by the whole family. The whole highlight is in the comments of the Master, after which the film immediately becomes a serious textbook on raising boys and team building.

On the example of the behavior of a major, Nikolai Ivanovich shows the features of male psychology. This is the guidance of the mind, not feelings, the ability to quickly get together in a difficult moment, not to become limp. A purely masculine method of cheering up is shown — inducing hatred in oneself. Women probably rarely resort to this method. The major does not accumulate resentment in himself, but with a wave of his hand closes past topics and begins to move forward. With a physical victory over the enemy, he puts his foot on top, as a manifestation of solidarity with the international male community.

Payne is the model of an authoritarian leader, confident and not accepting objections. His leadership style is Silovik. This confirms his main motto: «You will not wait for pity from me.» He constantly applies the method of leading ahead. In the upbringing of boys, he mainly uses harsh methods, those that he used in the army.

But precisely such techniques are needed in this team, at this age and precisely in this period of time.

An adult leader must first show his inner strength, build a team, train, and then start making friends. When you are heard and listened to.

At one time, Anton Semenovich Makarenko created and led a children’s labor colony, in which he managed to re-educate more than one hundred juvenile delinquents. Is this not a feat worthy of both worship and study?

The methods that Payne uses give a positive result. He teaches the boys to follow the commands the first time. Not many parents can boast of such obedience to their children. The elder’s word must be law. And Nikolai Ivanovich’s metaphor sounds great in this case, that children do not break through the wall with their foreheads to get into another room, but bypass it.

The army method has a good effect on the education of the collective, when everyone is punished for the misconduct of one. And the team joins the process of education.

Major prepares children for adulthood and for possible serious trials.

Life is work, it is a lot of things that must be done, and without discipline, including self-discipline, you will not achieve anything in life.

Payne shows paternal love. He does not regret, but demands. And the repeated phrase: “You won’t wait for pity from me” sounds convincing. When one of the boys asked to go to the toilet, the answer was a firm “wait”.

And why not wait for the future man? Moreover, it is not known whether this request is manipulation, and whether everyone else will run after permission.

Fatherly love is also manifested in the case of a sick child. I’m sick, so I’ll treat. From Major Payne — 30 Immunity Squats.

And the major managed to make the children he brought up to believe in their own strength, overcoming their laziness, fears and physical weakness.

Payne’s harsh parenting methods are objected to by child psychologist Emily. She is the ideal representative of the maternal model of love and shows unconditional acceptance of children. Feel sorry for them, hugs, reassures. She gets involved and follows the boys’ lead. The fact that the child is an orphan, the major reacts calmly and without emotion, from the third position of perception. And the girl focuses on this, treats from the first position.

In the movie, the methods the girl uses are not the best. Children take advantage of her kindness and manipulate the teacher. They are wonderful actors.

A mobile child, especially a boy, must be kept on a short leash. Raise him like a man. If left to chance, a small animal can grow.

But in life, a child needs both paternal and maternal love. Only these manifestations of love must be coordinated, must be supported by each other and move in the same direction chosen by both parents in advance.

Lessons I have taken for myself? As for a woman:

1. A woman wants a healthy child with her mind, but chooses a sick and unhappy one with her heart. Therefore, in my love for my granddaughter, I will control my emotions.
2. Strong discipline has not prevented any child.
3. A good result gives mutual education. A father’s love must go hand in hand with a mother’s.

As for the leader:

1. The team must first be organized and then managed.
2. The voice is an important tool for a leader.

Video from Yana Shchastya: interview with professor of psychology N.I. Kozlov

Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be in order to successfully marry? How many times do men get married? Why are there so few normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A story that couldn’t be better. Paying for the opportunity to be close to a beautiful woman.