The most beautiful married woman of the planet from Rostov, Lyudmila Matua, explains how not to quarrel with a child and be able to explain to him why dad reads fairy tales before bedtime.
29-year-old Lyudmila is the holder of the title “Mrs. Planet – 2015”, which she won at a competition in Bulgaria. In addition to the Rostov beauty, married women from 20 to 40 years old from fifty countries took part in it. And our Lyudmila bypassed everyone! But the beauty can boast not only of victories in beauty contests (“Mrs. Russia International – 2014”, “Prima Dona – 2014”), an ideal figure (91-61-91 with a height of 175 cm), but also a happy family – her husband Raul and five-year-old son Richard. Lyudmila told Woman’s Day about how to cope with work in a government institution, prepare for beauty contests and manage to devote time to her family.
1. Never hit a child. No matter how your little one behaves, try to overcome your own anger and anger. Can’t collect your thoughts and quickly cool down after an argument? Go to the balcony or another room for a short time. Return to the conversation only when the emotions have subsided.
2. Know how to negotiate. With Richard, we always try to make a profitable compromise. Even if you want to demand something, do it in a form where the conditions are “spelled out” for both of you: for example, if you eat soup, let’s go for a walk. The child keeps his promise. You keep your word in return. Remember – you can always negotiate.
3. Communicate with your child. No matter how difficult the working day is, I take Richard to training in the evening. He goes to sports acrobatics, swims in the pool. On the way we talk: the son shares his observations about his day. I also tell interesting stories. After training, we always go for a walk together: Richard’s husband, dad, joins us. It is important that the baby plays both active and passive games: my spouse and I have shared responsibilities. My son and I draw, he plays football. Richard falls asleep at ten. If I rock him, I tell fictional tales about the life of a small tractor named Nikolasha. The husband reads fairy tales more often. When Raoul remains in charge in the nursery, I explain to my son that I still have things to do. Leaving the room, be sure to kiss the child and wish you good night.
4. When the child is offended, put yourself in his place, and you will understand what is wrong. It happens that Richard sulks at us because of some little thing. Once I accidentally broke my son’s craft from dry branches and leaves. The offense knew no bounds. I promised my son that we will make a new composition together – better and even more beautiful. It worked!
5. Show your child that there were rules in the house before he arrived, which must not be violated. In our family, for example, the main taboo is never to say bad words, not to swear. This is strictly prohibited.
6. Give your child enough time. I have a busy schedule: I work as an assistant to the Minister of Information Technology and Communications of the Rostov Region. But every day I find one morning hour for the child. At 7:30 the baby wakes up: I always wake up and wash him myself. I will definitely prepare breakfast. And I even manage to take them to the kindergarten. And after work from 18:30 pm to 22:00 pm I am at Richard’s full disposal.
7. Never find out the relationship with the child. Raoul and I do not argue in front of our son. But if it is already impossible to restrain ourselves, we go for a conversation … in the car! There we dot all the i’s, saving the child from scenes and negative emotions.
8. Do not follow the child’s lead: please, but do not indulge all his desires. The kid must understand: all his “want” has a limit. It happens that the son flirts on the playground or starts asking for a ride on the rides on which he has already ridden. In such cases, no matter how he begs, the son gets a refusal. You can’t do without whining. It is important at this moment to turn the child’s attention to something else.
9. Always tell your child that you love him. I do not hesitate to repeat this often, many, many times a day. The main thing is sincerity in a relationship. I confess we are planning another one. Richard really wants a brother or sister.
10. Take your child’s free time with developmental activities. Richard is actively preparing for school: even at the age of five, he has a lot of homework. The son draws, plays with a ball. And on weekends, we definitely go out somewhere: if the weather and time permit, we go to the water park. Both on weekdays and on weekends, without exception, I forbid Richard to use tablets and phones. I want the child to be active, develop normally, and not sit like a zombie playing games.
Julia Vasilieva, Tatiana Volskaya