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Luis Huete: «There are no impossible goals, but inadequate deadlines»
Psychology
Luis Huete, author of «Build your dream 2.0», says that the best personal project is to live and die happy, feeling that one is not very far from the best possible version of oneself, and «enjoying what is shared with the people who are they have crossed in our life ». In the end, the writer explains, “a life well lived is nothing more than the development and mobilization of resources to obtain inner and outer abundance, in oneself and in others.” The doctor in Business Administration from Boston University, reveals in his latest book (he has 12 titles for sale) the strategies to achieve true personal progress and integrate planes that are often in conflict: the professional and the personal, success and achievement or what I want versus what others expect.
“Build your dream 2.0” provides ideas to achieve this goal. The calm development of good cognitive, emotional and behavioral habits is the starting point of a path in which the “personal environment”, the psychology with which we operate to cope with the environments in which we move, acquires great importance. It is here where the author points out that any goal could be achieved, but always taking into account certain factors. “There are no purely ‘objective’ probabilities of achieving a dream. Human genius makes a difference in the calculation of probabilities. The probabilities of achieving the objectives skyrocket when a person desires something with intensity and for good reason, he knows how to surround himself with good ‘accomplices’ who accompany him in his endeavor, he is made with the necessary knowledge to achieve his objective, and is constant in their endeavor. I think it is valuable to operate with the belief that there are no impossible goals but rather inadequate deadlines», Says the expert.
Manage your basic desires
Luis Huete says that it is essential to perfectly manage the basic desires because otherwise the project to be carried out will not be built on the correct foundations. “The construction of a good project is in danger if the management of basic wishes is incorrect. This occurs, for example, when the measure of personal worth is put in the money that is earned, in the professional position that one occupies, in the social relationships that one has, or in the public image. These realities, valuable in themselves, are not the true measure of personal worth. They are not ends, they are means ”, explains the writer, giving another advice to build a personal or professional dream.
Take away from you what prevents you from moving forward
Have you ever been told to get rid of those “toxic” people who don’t give you anything? Or that you leave the job with which you do not feel fulfilled and look for “something else”? It seems easy to say, but Luis Huete does defend these tips for the advancement of an objective: «The great enemies of the construction of our dreams are the self-limiting beliefs and the poor diet of the desires of security / control; uniqueness / domain; novelty / fun and connection / acceptance. In the end, everything that is filling the head and the heart with cognitive and emotional ‘garbage’ prevents us from deploying our personal power and flying higher ”, he says, adding that interdependence, the set of relationships between two people or entities, is fundamental to advance.
“A healthy independence from what others think is the first step to generating interdependent relationships, which are the relationships with the highest added value. A healthy psychology is based on focusing on what one has and can do, and not on what we lack and others should do for us, “he says.
The defense mechanisms that will help us to improve ourselves as people
- Use conflict to get to know yourself better and to connect with that part of our personality that seeks experience.
- 2. Reasoning about the content of adversity: go by parts, separate, see the nuances.
- 3. Use adversity to improve your ability to anticipate.
- 4. Shifting the focus of attention from the conflict and taking it to other areas.
- 5. De-dramatize and reduce the negative emotional charge of adversity.
- 6. Sense of humor when expressing, without discomfort or acrimony, the adversity we face.
- 7. Face adversity with altruism and a service mindset.
- 8. Make asceticism a philosophy of life.
- 9. Thinking about conflict in a way that dignifies it and serves a positive purpose in our life journey.
- 10. Self-control to gain personal “temper”.
The defense mechanisms that will not help us to improve ourselves as people
- 1. Blaming others for our problems.
- 2. Make up reasons to justify yourself for things that don’t work.
- 3. Refusing to see things as they are.
- 4. Inhibition of emotions and thoughts.
- 5. Fleeing forward creating bigger problems.
- 6. Jealousy and desire to control and manage others.
- 7. Autistic withdrawal from reality through “fantasies” generated, for example, with drugs and alcohol.
- 8. Passivity as a way of punishing oneself.
- 9. Hypochondria.
- 10. The recourse to primitive behaviors in which aggressiveness, violence and all kinds of abuse have a nature.