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Of course, every parent wants the best for their child. However, a misunderstanding of child psychology or outdated principles of education can only harm the child. We share simple rules that will help raise a child happy.
1. Prioritize your child’s wishes
First of all, it is necessary to understand that the happiness of a child includes only his own, and not parental interests and desires, psychologist Tatyana Mer notes for . According to her, you should not impose preferences and activities on your son or daughter, based on your ideas about what is right and good. It is much more important to let the child make his own decisions and feel happy.
2. Cultivate adequate self-esteem
Healthy self-esteem is a key factor in success in adulthood. People who objectively evaluate their qualities achieve success both in the personal and professional spheres. The psychologist recalls that parents lay the foundation for self-esteem, so it is worth paying special attention to its formation. Here’s what you can do to develop adequate self-esteem:
Encourage
Every child can do something well — be sure to notice his successes, no matter how small, and focus on what happened. In addition, Tatyana Mer recommends that even in a situation of failure, pay attention to the positive side of the event. For example: «Well done, I was not afraid to compete with more experienced … I probably would not have dared.» The parent should instill in the child the feeling that trying new things is interesting.
Do not compare
Remember that all children have different rates of development, so one child already knows how to read, and the other does not yet know the alphabet, but, for example, spins perfectly on the crossbar. By the way, physical activity also stimulates other areas of the brain, including those responsible for speech.
Don’t criticize
Tatyana Mer recalls that it is only a matter of time before a child learns all vital skills, if we are not talking about children with a severe diagnosis. So be patient and do not rush to scold and scold the child if something does not work out for him.
3. Teach by example
How can a child understand what it means to be happy? Just looking at your parents. If adults wake up in a good mood, love their work, take care of the house and children with pleasure, and are always ready for adventure, searching for interesting information and fun, the child is much more likely to join the same lifestyle.
4. Protect childhood
The child should live his childhood in a priority activity — the game, Tatyana Mer insists. You can not deprive the child of the main type of development at this age. Early development is an attractive and popular idea, but it has pitfalls. For example, learning at an early age can block the understanding of more complex things in the future.
5. Pay attention to advantages
Avoid generalizations about the child’s virtues, such as beauty, intelligence, or strength. It’s much better to point out specific virtues, such as saying that he has beautiful eyes, that he rides a bicycle dexterously, and that he is very cute when he smiles.
6. Stick to the general rules
It is important that parents, grandparents and other relatives involved in the upbringing of the child act together. The situation when one adult forbids something, and the other allows it, causes dissonance and confusion in the child, who to trust. Also, do not discuss educational concepts in front of a child — it is better to agree on the rules in advance among yourself.
7. Let loose
Do not rush to come up with an activity for your child as soon as he gets bored, Tatyana Mer warns. Boredom is an important developmental stimulus, forcing the child to figure out what to do with himself. But the daily workload is a step towards the fact that he will grow up as an ordinary performer, and not a creative and happy person.
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