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Psychotherapists have been using the provocative method in their work for decades, but it still raises many questions. Why does this method work? Where is the line between provocation and aggression? Can a specialist injure a patient? We deal with the Gestalt therapist.
The hall is packed to capacity. The participants of the training raise their hands to ask their question, and a young woman takes the microphone. She tries to ask a question and bursts into tears: “My child is only six months old. This is not the first time he slips out of my hands and falls. Why?”
The question is cut off, the mother cannot speak. She sobs, and with her, everyone else. The coach comes closer and looks into her eyes: “Why are you leaving your child?” The sudden question leaves the woman speechless. The hall hums indignantly.
On the other side of the curtain
This is a method of provocative psychotherapy. The leader of the training is Marik Khazin.
Gestalt therapist, director, musician, artist, author of books and creator of his own direction – an expressive and creative method of personality development, which combines the gestalt approach, psychodrama, contact improvisation, art therapy, acting and tai chi quan. In her work with clients and at trainings, Marik, among other things, uses the techniques of provocative psychotherapy, but adhering to certain principles.
“I look at the person and trust my intuition. I see when you can ask a provocative question, and when you shouldn’t. To whom this method is suitable, and with whom it is worth communicating differently. In the arsenal of a coach, a psychotherapist, there should be several directions. And provocative may be just one of many.”
humor and kindness
“The therapeutic effect of provocation is impossible without humor (but not sarcasm) and kindness,” explains Marik Khazin. – Humor helps to relieve tension, change the view of the problem. And the kindness and desire to help a person make all these jokes really therapy. Clients spoke of the same Farelli as a caring father, with whom it is comfortable and safe.
According to Marik, the provocative method (as well as others) is like a scalpel in the hands of a surgeon. If the therapist has experience, extensive knowledge and intuition, then the “operation” will be successful and help the client get rid of the problem. But in the hands of an amateur, the scalpel becomes a dangerous weapon.
“Danger! Keep out”
This phrase used to be written on transformer boxes with high voltage. Now it would be appropriate on the websites of pseudo-trainers and insta-coaches, who, after completing weekly courses, offer consultations using provocative therapy.
Unfortunately, the price of their unprofessionalism for clients can be too high. Inappropriately and illiterately used provocation can cause a backlash, cause harm, and in some cases lead to an aggravation of psychological trauma.
How do you know that you are an expert worthy of trust? Unfortunately, it is not easy to choose the criteria. Among other things, you should think about the cost of the session.
“If it is too low, the question arises about the qualifications of a coach or trainer,” says Marik Khazin. “If it’s pretty high, maybe it’s not psychotherapy anymore, but a way to make money on you.”
Trusting yourself to a psychologist, in any case, check where and what kind of education he received, where, from whom and for how long he studied psychotherapy. Weekly or even monthly courses cannot turn yesterday’s manager into a specialist. Read reviews from other customers. Remember the therapist’s humor and kindness, which are essential in provocative therapy.
And most importantly, Marik advises, listen to your intuition.
Therapeutic effect
On the last day of the training, the same woman again asked for a microphone. The question that shocked the audience, why she drops her child, led her to understand her condition. Having become a mother, she was not ready for the hardships of parenthood and responsibility for a child. The internal conflict was revealed, she realized and recognized her feelings. And she hasn’t dropped a baby since.
A bit of history
The method was invented and developed by psychotherapist Frank Farelli, who in 1974 described it in the book Provocative Therapy. In working with one of his patients, Farelli made an unexpected move that moved the therapeutic work off the ground.
The man who visited him seemed to be stuck in endless self-flagellation, blaming himself for every possible failure. The psychotherapist’s support did not help, and then Farelli suddenly agreed: “Yes, you are a loser …” With humor, bringing the accusations to the point of absurdity, the therapist got the client to contradict him, listing his strengths: “I continued to tease him, and he blushed and chuckled. He came to life before my eyes, and it was like a resurrection from the dead.
About method
Provocative (provocative) psychotherapy is a method of psychological practice that helps the client change his attitude towards the problem, himself and his abilities. PT techniques help a person to look at the situation differently, get out of the position of the “victim”, see new solutions. The use of a provocative method can be seen in the Russian TV series Trigger.
39 Paradoxical Principles of Provocative Therapy by Frank Farelli
Get into physical contact.
Use a playful tone; change to hypnotic if the client is thinking; be confused if you don’t know what to do.
Non-verbally mirror the client.
Use jokes.
Focus only on the client.
Never help a client!
Do not follow the logic in the sequential course of the session.
Be off topic and even deaf.
Remember that the goal is to provoke behavior appropriate to the situation.
Go ahead with emotions.
Be blind to client signals that stop you.
Describe to the client what his gestures mean.
Always clarify what the client means.
Use the client’s trance for suggestions.
Be serious about the client’s traumatic experience, ask questions, then act.
Behave unnaturally, just like the client behaves.
Interrupt him, “don’t let me say a word.”
Imitate the client.
Show the client how the audience reacts to him.
Misinterpret (positively) the client’s communication difficulties.
Calmly state that nothing is changing for the better.
Stupidly undermine the feedback expected by the client.
Make the client repeat the “truths” he has found.
Use your imagination widely and intensively.
Everything is always stronger and more distinct than it seems in reality.
Use the absurd like Dali did.
Give absurd interpretations of problems.
Highlight and reinforce the client’s attitudes until the problem is resolved.
The customer is always crap.
Expose the client’s bodily defects.
Destroy cultural, gender and class stereotypes.
Enter the state of a giggling teenager yourself.
At the same time, be warm and understanding.
Follow your intuition.
Turn on the “internal TV” and watch all participants in the process.
Transfer blame from the subject to the environment and vice versa.
Accept different sides of the conflict.
Demand that the client perform interestingly.
Always be crazier than the client.
Marik Khazin
Psychologist, psychotherapist. Author of the books “From love to hate… and back”, “Sold!!!”, “Open the window! How to let new opportunities into your life ”(co-authored with wife Ev Khazina)
marik.ru
1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wVXRA3sovQ
Photographer: Arlan Baikhodjaev