PSYchology

The 5 situation

Gena really does not want to go to bed before everyone else. It is useless to talk about this with mom and grandmother: they are on guard of the regime.

Dad is also for order, but in some cases he allows deviations: especially on those days when football is shown on TV. Dad is a passionate fan, and the son knows that he will sympathize with anyone who wants to share the company with him. And the sly one takes advantage of it.

The son looks into his father’s eyes and ingratiatingly says:

“Dad, can I watch with you?” (Pause.)

— Well, daddy-ah, — pulls the son, — can I?

The boy knows that dad will be silent for a while, and then he will say in a condescending tone:

— So be it, I allow it as an exception!

Gena knows that such exceptions are quite legal. And today everything is repeated exactly as it was before: dad is silent, then says:

— So be it, I allow it as an exception!

The son stays to watch TV. He knows that next week, when they broadcast football, everything will be like today. But in everything else, dad is strict, and if he said «no», then it’s useless to ask.

And in a conversation with his mother, Gena has a demanding tone. Especially when it comes to shopping for toys and treats. And my son enjoys it.

And with grandma! You can even be capricious with her, shed a tear, pretending to be small and offended.

Comment psychologist:

One of the important conditions for education is the consistency of the requirements of all adult family members. It is unacceptable that one of the adults in the eyes of the child looked like a strict educator, and the other — like a good intercessor. Children subtly grasp how to behave with each of them. The one who is more inferior to the child achieves obedience with difficulty.

The 6 situation

Three-year-old Natasha announces the apartment with loud cries:

— I want to go outside! Walk more! I want to jump rope!

She clings to her coat, trying to keep it from taking off. She “does not hear” her mother’s persuasion that it is already time to have dinner and sleep, that all the children have also gone home. The girl throws herself on the floor with a squeal, knocking her feet. See →

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