The 13 situation
The first frosts covered the stream with a crystal crust. Six-year-old Valerik and Zhenya decided to test the strength of the ice. The most common method: will the ice fail or not if you walk on it? Finding themselves knee-deep in icy water, they had to listen to the notation from their parents: you can’t do this, you can get sick. The warning, unfortunately, did not work: the «experiment» was repeated the next day. The parents of Valerik and Zhenya, each in their own way, began to instruct their sons.
Zhenya’s mother turns to her son with irritation:
«I’ll show you how to disobey your mother!» Do you want to fall into cold water and get sick?
In her hearts, she spanks her son: “So that he understands next time!”
Valerik’s mother affects the boy differently:
“You were at the stream again and nearly fell through?” How so? I warned you, but you didn’t listen. You know, if you get sick, I’ll have to take care of you, take an exemption from work. You know how difficult it is: you have to call my substitute, and she has a small child. How will he be alone? Do you see what can happen?
“I won’t do it again,” Valerik tries to assure his mother.
— Good. I believe you,” his mother approves. — And tell Zhenya.
Comment psychologist:
Zhenya’s mother, shouting at her son and spanking him, thereby expresses disrespect and distrust towards him. This cannot contribute to the formation in a growing person of a sense of dignity and responsibility for his actions. Such an approach to the child cannot be justified, it can lead to the fact that the child will get used to obey only when adults are watching him, and in their absence he will act in his own way.
Valerik’s mother’s method is designed for the conscience and consciousness of the child. She connects his act with inconvenience for other people, thereby forming in him a sense of responsibility for his behavior. It cannot be ignored that the older preschooler is more willing to comply with the requirements when he understands why they are necessary.
The 14 situation
Four-year-old Marinka is going to kindergarten in the morning. And then the grandmother sees that she is putting on her mother’s hat.
— Beautiful? Does it suit me? she asks.
— No, it’s not pretty. These hats are worn only by adults, says Grandma.
And her girl:
— No, it’s beautiful! I like! I will go in it. She suits me. See →