Johnny Depp: “I don’t rebel anymore”

A man who learned to shoot at six, started playing rock guitar at 11, smoked at 12, tried marijuana at 12 and a half, lost his virginity at 13, showed his teacher a soft spot at 14, dropped out of school at 15, in a fit of aggression defeated once a hotel room, drank “thousand megaliters” of whiskey, fought with the paparazzi, was accused of selling drugs, owned a nightclub with a dubious reputation, has 12 tattoos, and therefore calls his body a “livejournal” … This person in front of me is peace personified , cordiality and complete acceptance of the world. I am clearly dealing with a “plateau man”, in the sense that he himself speaks of: “When you climb for a long time, you will definitely reach a plateau.” Johnny Depp is now on a plateau – he is quite high, and he has a view of both the lowlands and the sky. But there is no arrogance in him. I might like to look up to him – after all, he is a star, but Depp cannot stand such treatment. He is clearly embarrassed, he is a shy person. And delicate. But I would like to switch to “you” with me, because we are talking about rather personal things, about his personal experience, trust is needed here, and Depp regrets that there is no “you” in English, because now that he “spends half his life on -French”, felt the “magic difference” between “you” and “you”. He generally thinks that he has become “you” with the world, and he likes this phase of life, “when you are under fifty dollars, you have seen a lot, a lot is still ahead, but you already know how to handle it, although you haven’t lost it yet.” the ability to wonder.”

He has touching wrinkles around his eyes, hidden by heavy-framed blue-glass glasses, and small hands in leather wristlets – many, many straps. He is not a model of ideal physique or male beauty. It moves angularly but softly, quite silently; he did not enter the hotel room filmed for our interview, but somehow flowed into it, leaked out. His plasticity is devoid of gestures, and his facial expressions are restrained. Turning out his pockets, he places a pack of short brown cigarillos and a lighter on the coffee table between us. This is the only decisive action that he took during the entire time of our conversation. So I didn’t smoke. As well as did not change the position in the chair.

In his quiet voice, in those wrinkles, in his behavior, as if specially designed so as not to attract attention, in the intonational “you” that envelops the pronounced “you”, there is more – significance. It is immediately clear: Johnny Depp is a significant figure. Although not ideal.

What gave you such self-confidence?

D.D.: Our family … it was not just dysfunctional, but deeply ill. From such families, by the way, serial killers come out. I want to say – everything provoked to the extreme. My extreme was to stand up for who I am. Fight for your own identity. And then came the guitar. My mom gave me a $25 guitar when I was eleven. It was love at first sight, passion. I was only interested in music. You know, I don’t remember a transitional age at all, I don’t remember conflicts, quarrels, a revolt of hormones. I remember that I then listened to what I played, as my fingers erased to the joints, trying to play the Pergolesi guitar, you moron. Nothing made more sense than the music. This story with the teacher, whom I showed the ass – I do not see anything exceptional here. Even a particularly scandalous one, although after it they made me understand at school that I was free not to return to it in the morning. Actually, that’s what I did … She just kept trying to get me to the nail, to the nail … For some reason, she needed it – for me to become an obedient animal, so that I could be like everyone else. And I always suspected that it was normal to be different. Being different is not a crime. School was a constant test, if not torture. And I left her. Nothing special, I just saw my way differently.

What helps you to move along it, not to turn off your path?

D.D.: I can’t be… someone else’s product. I cannot be the result of the efforts of others. After Jump Street… how old was I… yes, 27. So, the show was a huge success, I became something of a teenage icon. And they began to make plans for me – agents, producers, journalists, even viewers. But I had no intention of becoming a brand, selling this fashionable style – Johnny Depp from Jump Street. I sent everyone – without rudeness, inside myself, but finally. And I started looking for another role. Then I starred first with John Waters in the hooligan “Crybaby”, and then finally with Tim Burton. In the role of a monster, not a glamorous young man with a cook. Pale, thin, shaggy guy of artificial origin, scarred. And with scissors instead of hands.

Weren’t you afraid to give up the right career?

D.D.: Yes, I remember that feeling – you enter a restaurant and everyone is looking at you. But that’s okay. What really got me was that I saw how this machine works to grind me into minced meat of a popular actor. I saw the flywheel turn. How I end up first on a school lunch box, then on a thermos, and then on the cover of a notebook … And I blew up this asphalt skating rink! I was not afraid of any job – neither in a restaurant variety show, nor as a clown at McDonald’s. If only not under the rink. I’m not going to be anyone’s work and live up to anyone’s expectations. I have mine. And that’s why I’m never interested in, say, the box office of the films I starred in. You could say I made a career out of failure. In the sense that I played a lot of box office failure films. But I’m not a businessman, I’m not interested in the economics of the Hollywood industry. I’m not filming for the box office. And besides, I do not like it when life makes me understand that it is preparing to drive me into a corner. At these moments, I begin to show my ass, destroy numbers, throw stones …

Throwing stones?

D.D.: Yes, this is my mother … I was bullied in elementary grades. And they would have hunted. If my mother had not once told me: “You know, Johnny, there is always a stone under your feet. So if you get bullied, just pick it up and drop it. Aim for the eyes of the scum.” And then I thought: well, the truth is – there is always a stone under your feet. Mom knew what she was talking about: she worked all her life as a waitress in eateries. But from the very first of my real earnings, she no longer worked.

Were you close to your mother?

D.D.: Well… when my parents separated, I chose her. Stayed with her. She is a difficult person. When I got my first movie role, I had a kind of euphoria. What I just didn’t do before – I was a handyman, a parking attendant, a gas station attendant … And I was always happy with any money – it would be something to pay for an apartment. I was earning 25 dollars a week, and then 1200 at once! Called my mom. I say: “Mom, I got the role, I will act in films!” – And she: “What kind of movie?” – Without any euphoria. And until I convinced her that it was not at all of that kind, she was not happy. She has strong principles. Power. Special female power.

How do you understand this – female power?

D.D.: Elementary. He who saw the birth of his child, as I saw, will never doubt her. Women are stronger than us. For them, there is no nonsense – only the main thing. Life, children, freedom. They do not see the point in eternal life – they continue in children, and that is enough. They are not conquerors – the world already belongs to them, because they are able to create a new life.

And they easily sacrifice themselves. So now I’m paying off more and more debts.

To whom and what?

D.D.: Vanessa in the first place (Vanessa Paradis – French actress and singer, Depp’s common-law wife. Approx. ed.). These 12 years that we have been together, she refused roles, from discs – for the sake of me, my career, our family. But when you meet a woman, a beautiful woman who understands you so deeply… at some point you say: enough is enough. Stop accepting her gifts. You see, meeting Vanessa changed my life dramatically. I won’t say that she changed me … But no, she did change me – I didn’t think that I would meet a woman who would understand me like that … In general, I hope that now Vanessa will do what she sees fit – she will record a new disc, play in films. I am not at all embarrassed by the role of “dad is always at home.” I now try to be at home as much as possible. Let Vanessa feel the freedom of choice – her own, not related to the needs of the family.

How did you meet? How do such relationships begin – strong, harmonious?

D.D.: The usual thing. We met a long time ago, in 93. I remember that feeling – wow. Well, it has been and gone. Second. And then in Paris, I starred in The Ninth Gate with Polanski. I sat in the hotel lobby at the computer, catching emails. And suddenly I saw an unthinkable back at the other end of the lobby. A woman in a dress with an open back. “Wow…” I thought. She suddenly turned around and looked at me. I turned away and went to the elevator. And those eyes again. “Do you remember me?” she asked. And that’s all. I knew right away that there was a big problem. The end, the death of all past life.

What language do you speak with children?

D.D.: I am in English. Vanessa is in French. They are bilingual. But we spend a lot of time in France, and I didn’t want my kids to think: Dad is an idiot who doesn’t understand what they are talking about when they speak French. So I had to speak French. With the worst American accent ever! But now I almost say. And when I ask Lily-Rose (his daughter – Approx. ed.) if I’m terrible, she always answers so gently: “Ohhh, c’est tres bien, papa … (“Oh, very good, papa …”) This music of the spheres!

You admitted that you played Barbie with her…

D.D.: Sometimes I still play. No, I agree with feminists that this is education based on a false example, that a living woman cannot have such legs or such a figure at all, and that this is the education of future anorexics. But people, it’s just a doll! True, I play for selfishness: I invent a role. The character I’m about to play. I put Barbie in different situations to understand how she will act in them. Getting ready for “Tourist”I have played a lot of Barbie. Lily-Rose even begged to switch to other games!

Do children watch your films?

D.D.: They are yes. But I never watch and I don’t keep them company. On the day of the end of the dubbing, my work is finished. I don’t really like to see myself on the screen – what didn’t I see there? And the kids are watching.

And which of your characters do they like more – perhaps Captain Jack from Pirates of the Caribbean?

D.D.: Not at all. They love Edward Scissors.

But it’s a very sad character…

D.D.: Tragic. It’s great that they love him. He is so lonely, hopeless … And they pity him, sympathize. What else can we teach our children, how not to feel really, deeply? In my opinion, the main thing is to teach this. The rest is just education.

What kind of father are you, how would you describe yourself in this role?

D.D.: You see, family… They are the main thing for me. An unexpected gift, an unimaginable lottery win. Lifebuoy. Rescue shelter. I never hoped to have it all. And so now… you could say I live in fear. Constant anxiety: well, it can’t be that I had all this! My brother was right. When I told him that Vanessa was pregnant, he casually said, “Congratulations. You will never sleep as carefree as before. You will never have a quiet day. But it’s worth it.” It’s true. It’s worth it… Lily-Rose was born and they let me hold her. She was three hours old, she fell asleep. I held it and… well, I felt very keenly: no human being will ever be closer to me. And I won’t be closer to anyone. And so it was until Jack was born … Oh, I was terribly afraid of the second child. How can I love him like Lily-Rose? What if I love less? But when he was born, there was no doubt. Love is a strange thing. It is neither less nor more. You know, I was already forty when I made the first absolutely correct financial investment in my life. Bought a house in the south of France for Vanessa and me and Lily-Rose – then we had another one. And you know, it was the first time in my life when I was on the set saying: “I need to call home,” I literally meant home. Where my home really is…

And yet you and Vanessa are not going to formalize the marriage …

D.D.: My grandmother used to say, “Don’t fix what isn’t broken.”

How carefully – you no longer like decisive actions?

D.D.: Of course, I don’t rebel anymore. A rebel can only be a former if there is someone in his life who says: “Ohhh, c’est très bien, papa …”