Jennifer Lopez: “I only compete with myself”

A successful actress, singer, owner of her own brand, happy mother and beloved woman. It seems that Jennifer Lopez has achieved everything you can dream of. Meeting with a woman of amazing fortitude.

Сегодня она — главный гость популярного шоу телеканала ABC. И назначила мне встречу… на парковке его лос-анджелесской студии. Уж не знаю, как ей удалось точно рассчитать время, когда после шоу она появится на этой парковке. Но факт: минута в минуту, в 15.00 открывается дверь съемочного павильона и выходят четыре телохранителя. А за ними она: белый свитер, черная юбка, туфли на каблуках 12… нет, все 15 см. Тонкая талия, элегантный изгиб бедра, идеальные ноги. Человек-пропорция, я бы сказала. Она пунктуальна и идеальна… Но идеальность оказывается обманчивой. «Слушайте, дорогая. Извините меня. Тут все так завертелось…» — она говорит быстро, а я быстро понимаю, что интервью срывается. И тут она неожиданно добавляет: «В общем, жду вас дома вечером. В восемь». — «Но я не знаю, куда ехать!» — «Поезжайте по 101-му фривею и сверните в 30-й съезд. Это просто!»

I think Jennifer Lopez gave me a chance to get into the secret of her success: you need to turn on the engine, choose a direction and just move. And you will arrive at the goal if you do not change your direction …

К 8 вечера я оказываюсь в ее районе на западе от Лос-Анджелеса — фешенебельном, закрытом, отмеченном ландшафтным дизайном. Привратник предупрежден о моем приезде, и вот уже я иду к особняку из белого кирпича. Интерьер– воплощенная Лопес: современная роскошь, прикидывающаяся аскезой. Темные полы, серые гардины, мебель пастельных тонов. Меня встречает ее ассистентка Джилли, проводит в кабинет и говорит, что Дженнифер будет через 5 минут.

В кабинете все тоже воплощенная Лопес — мужская воля и женственность одновременно: деревянные панели на стенах и кресла с изогнутыми спинками, мех, небрежно брошенный на диван, и музыкальная установка мощности космического корабля. И книжные шкафы, содержимое которых проявляет художественные вкусы обладательницы: безусловная классика («Гроздья гнева» Стейнбека и альбомы мастеров Возрождения), правдивые мемуары (Артур Миллер и Норман Мейлер) и самонадеянные «учебники жизни» («Ложь пред алтарем: Правда о великих браках»).

I take just a few steps in search of a toilet and … unexpectedly find myself in the kitchen, where the hostess of the house is talking to her lover, Casper Smart. I’m lost, and she: “Oh, I’m sorry!” – as if it was not me who interfered, but she made some tactlessness … It’s just amazing. Films with Jennifer Lopez have collected almost $ 2 billion at the global box office. Her albums are sold in the millions. She is a superstar and even a trademark – J.Lo ™. She lives behind a high fence, behind a shock-absorbing fence made of agents. So how does she manage to stay alive with all this? A person who is embarrassed and apologetic…

Dates

  • 1969 Родилась в Нью-Йорке, в семье IT-специалиста и воспитательницы детсада.
  • 1987 Debut in Connie Kaiserman’s My Little Girl.
  • 1997 «Поворот» Оливера Стоуна.
  • 1999 Her first album On the 6.
  • 2001 “Wedding Planner” by Adam Shankman; trademark registration J.Lo by Jennifer Lopez.
  • 2004 Marries musician Marc Anthony.
  • 2008 Birth of twins Max and Emmy.
  • 2011 Divorce from Anthony; romance with choreographer Casper Smart.
  • 2013 Works on the documentary “Jennifer Lopez: Dancing Again” by Ted Kenny.

Psychologies: Have you ever felt trapped by your own fame?

Jennifer Lopez: Well no. I perceive my fame not as a desired goal, to which I finally came, but as something accompanying.

Accompanying what?

Дж. Л.: For what I really want. I will explain the difference. It’s just that the point for me is not to be a singer or actress, but to be as good a singer or actress as I can be. Reach the limit of yourself, your abilities, use them 100%, express yourself fully. The meaning for me is in this personal… how should I say… fulfillment, or something. And the rest – fame, big money – it’s all a fun by-product. The most important thing is to express what only I can express.

Have you always lived with this belief?

Дж. Л.: My parents thought I was crazy when I dropped out of college and told them that I was going to sing and dance professionally. They said, “Jenny, this is just stupid. None of the Latinos succeeded!” And it was true: not a single Latino had really big success in show business then. But this logic – “impossible, because it was not like this before” – I simply did not understand. And I did not pay attention at all to the fact that I was entering the zone of the greatest competition.

Why?

Дж. Л.: If I compete with someone, then only with myself – for the best myself … Then I left my parents, mortally quarreling with them.

Already at the zenith of your popularity, you released the song Jenny from the Block, where you claimed that you are still the same “Jenny from the Block” that you were 20 years ago. And then they didn’t really believe you …

Дж. Л.: Logically, no one with millions of dollars can claim that he has saved himself. Damn it, who is happier with a million dollar fortune?! The greatest happiness is just not to let external circumstances change you beyond recognition. And I just recognize myself. The one from the Bronx, from the Puerto Rican neighborhood. I recognize in myself all the best and worst traits that the Bronx laid in me.

Her three styles

Apparently, one of the reasons for the worldwide, grandiose success of Jennifer Lopez is her ability to conform to circumstances with an unshakable belief that it is in her power to overcome any of them. And she has always been able to change at the demand of the moment. Outwardly too.

Style first. She says that this style still echoes in her. She still likes to dress up in a T-shirt with a “lower neckline” – an open belly, shorts and flip flops. She is still tied to massive jewelry, almost shoulder-length earrings and leopard-zebra prints … In our country, this style is considered, frankly, “gopnicheskoy”, and in America it is defined by borrowing the name from the film shot by Robert De Niro, as “Tale of the Bronx”. The same Bronx where J. Lo comes from.

Style two. Lopez claims that when she was a dancer, she didn’t have skirts at all. That she went exclusively in jeans, sweatpants and Dr. Martens. Then it was necessary to be constantly in shape, in motion, in order to be in time for rehearsals, performances, new auditions. Is it glamourous…

Стиль третий. Becoming a star, Jennifer began to shine, and with her characteristic determination. So, in 2000, at the Grammy ceremony, she appeared in a green silk chiffon dress from Donatella Versace, which social observers still remember – a neckline that descended significantly below the navel (literally), and other parts of the body were enveloped only in green fog … Her style was overtly sexy. “Tale of the Bronx” transformed into aggressive chic. At the Grammys in February 2013, she appeared in a black dress, which was considered “desperately bold” because it completely showed her right leg. Which, by the way, came into conflict with the dress code, which warned the participants against clothes that “reveal unnecessarily large areas of the body.” But who can dictate the rules for Jennifer Lopez?

For example, which ones?

Дж. Л.: Ну, я вообще-то несколько бесцеремонна. Есть во мне некоторое панибратство. Я прямая. Я уважаю социальный успех — а это все-таки комплекс, о человеке нельзя судить по степени его успешности. Я люблю знать о людях много — это тоже из Бронкса, в нашем квартале все про всех все знали: кто с кем, кто от кого, кто у кого. Я и сохранила привычку неосознанно собирать информацию о людях. Особенно личного характера. Стыдоба, но факт! Но я никогда не вмешиваюсь ни в чьи дела — опять Бронкс, там жили тесновато, да и по правилам гетто — сгрудившись, так что известная дистанция в отношениях была штукой необходимой.

But has anything changed since then?

«ЭТО НЕВОЗМОЖНО, ПОТОМУ ЧТО РАНЬШЕ ТАК НИКТО НЕ ДЕЛАЛ», — ТАКУЮ ЛОГИКУ Я НЕ ПОНИМАЮ!»

J.L. Yes, and I myself noted that something important has changed. One girl, she has been working with me for three years, told me about her lover. That they have been together for a long time and she would already like a more stable relationship, and he lives in his parents’ house – it is more convenient for him – and nothing portends a life together. She asked me for advice on what to do. And I – I didn’t expect from myself – suddenly said that she needed to get pregnant from him and everything would fall into place. I took it and said. And this is my advice … First, it is completely against my beliefs. I advise a person to put another in forced circumstances, to pin him to the wall. To carry out some kind of violence on him. Secondly, he is against my habit of not interfering in someone else’s life. I am against all this! But experience, feminine and worldly, pushes me, says: tact is not the best adviser. And if a person trusts me, and I treat a person sincerely, then I should forget about tact or high principles. Before, I would never have done this – I would have kept my distance to the last. And now no.

Do you think this is called the female experience?

Дж. Л.: Это опыт пожившего человека. Причем на полную катушку — интенсивно, насыщенно. Да — и опыт женщины. Когда у тебя есть дети… ты на все смотришь под другим углом — на свои отношения с миром, с мужчинами. Я сказала, что той девушке надо завести ребенка еще и потому, что изменилась бы ее собственная система координат.

How has yours changed?

Дж. Л.: With the birth of children, I was no longer number one on my own priority list. Now they are number one. I can’t even imagine how I could perform – and then I had a world concert tour – almost until the seventh month of pregnancy! Now I would never do that: all my thoughts are that it will be good, convenient, great for children. I can’t even part with them – they travel with me all over the world. Max and Emmy were born by c-section, and after the operation, I refused painkillers – well, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, never any drugs, so no painkillers either. And because of the pain, I could not even take them in my arms. A nanny appeared – only for 6 weeks, but appeared. That’s when this horror seized me: they will love her, but not me. On a sober look – nonsense, well, how can a creature of two weeks of age love there? But I thought it could! He will love the nanny, but not me. It might have seemed like I was having a tantrum, but in fact, this is how I came to the discovery of great importance – that it is possible to love someone more than yourself! Mark said: in the form of such emotions, a hormonal storm flows in you. But I quite consciously felt: I should be with my children, this love is the most important thing in the world. The hormonal storm passed, but this belief remained … Probably, after the birth of children, I finally matured. Before that, I lived as if in anticipation of a different life, everything was preparing for some wonderful “tomorrow”. And the children made me understand that “tomorrow” has come, that we live in a long “today”. That it is impossible to experience greater love than for them … And then I made another discovery. An amazing sense of guilt. Guilt for the fact that you cannot hold your child by the hand, always in your arms, at every single moment of life. I still feel this feeling, although the children grow up and soon they will not even need my presence. This is some kind of original maternal instinct in me. Animal. But I like the animal nature that we have. It is our most sincere part.

Still, something ambiguous is heard in your advice to that girl. A condescending attitude towards a man as a controlled being, or something …

Дж. Л.: Что вы! Ни в коем случае! Просто не грех иногда, знаете, взять на себя роль Судьбы. И я теперь точно знаю, что мужчины — в большинстве своем — любят детей от любимых женщин. И им безразлично, их это дети по крови или нет. Они легко оставляют своих детей, чтобы любить, так сказать, чужих. И эти чужие для них становятся более своими.

Are you sure that you do not harbor any resentment towards the opposite sex?

Дж. Л.: Not! I don’t even think it’s that different. And the main people in my life who had a huge impact on me are men. My dad. He is from the category of holy men – who wholeheartedly care for a woman, are not able to upset her even fleetingly. He is so devoted to his women – his mother and us, three daughters. And each of us knew that the father is always, under any circumstances, our support. Once I left the house, slamming the door, but I still felt inside myself that it was make-believe … Another important man for me is my ex-husband Mark (Mark Anthony, musician and singer. – Approx. ed.). He is the father of the main joy in my life, my children. Even after the divorce, I have no resentment against him. We parted ways by mutual agreement, although…

Divorce is tough though.

Дж. Л.: Yes. We were together for 7 years, and I simply did not think of this divorce. I grew up in a close-knit family and, it seemed, finally found my family … But somehow everything went wrong, we stopped understanding each other. And here is the divorce. I did not sink into depression for a long time only because I categorically do not want to belong to those women who can lie under the covers all day long, covering themselves with their heads and nursing their pain. For some time I was still depressed, but I knew for sure that I had to go through it and move on. If I had not felt like an adult, becoming a mother, I might not have survived. Divorce is, in general, a thing for adults.

Your current partner is 18 years younger than you. Is this difference noticeable to you?

“I LIKE THE ANIMAL BEGINNING THAT WE HAVE IN US. THIS IS OUR MOST SINCERE PART”

Дж. Л.: Big difference, yes. But somehow for me it means nothing. We do a common thing: Casper is the choreographer of my show, we are interested together, we always have topics for conversation, we have common interests. We are together simply because we like being together. And if people break up, is it for some reason, say, because of the difference in age?

Do you think you have already found the formula for a strong relationship?

Дж. Л.: Durable? There is nothing stronger than love. Although it is strong, it is also fragile, hard, but also brittle… The rest is only ourselves, our effort to accept the other. There are no perfect people, and the one you love is not perfect either. You just have to accept its imperfection. Once and for all, agree that you will have to disagree with the one you love. Do not agree with him, with some of his features, with what he can sometimes be. This for me is both the meaning and the guarantee of a more or less happy relationship. And then, of course, I am fully aware: if a man appears in my life, then he fills some kind of gap in me – the lack of some part of me. I believe that an indissoluble bond is possible between a man and a woman, forever, until the death of both. Of course I do – but I just have no right not to believe in fairy tales! I myself am an example of how fairy tales come true in reality. A girl from a Puerto Rican family, a Latina from the criminal Bronx … But now you are interviewing me!

Leave a Reply