J. Salome “Live for yourself! Why You Shouldn’t Compliment with Other People’s Opinions

A wonderful book by the famous French psychologist Jacques Salome in a terrible translation.

The crushing egocentricity of the name can be confusing – at least for those who are familiar with the name of Jacques Salomé, the largest French social psychologist, the creator of the method of effective communication, which implies that communication is not only self-expression, but also a deep interest in the interlocutor. The confusion grows when you look at the original title – “And qui ferais-je de la peine si j’étais moi-même?” The translation could go something like this: “Who would feel bad if I were myself?” The same story with a subtitle: it is about how to abandon those mechanisms of our psyche that work to our detriment – Salome calls them “auto-saboteurs” – and finding a Russian equivalent is not an easy task. But the publishing house, together with translators and editors, is called upon to solve such problems. Alas, in this case they failed. As a result, reading becomes hard work. Here is an example, chosen at random from page 93: “We have the right to allow the other person to continue to see and perceive us as he wants, so as not to dwell too much on it, because we know that he too is at risk with his actions or behavior in the sense that that we become a surface for the projection of disproportionate positive or negative feelings.” Apparently, it is better to read this book in the original – or wait for the real translation.

Peter, 224 p.

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