It’s time to face weaknesses and overcome them

To put it bluntly, your biggest weakness is giving you a sense of security that keeps you from realizing your full potential. This applies to most of us, but this is not a reason not to even try to correct this shortcoming. Yes, it is extremely difficult to do this, but many succeed, and you can too. Here are five key steps to help you do just that.

1. Accept your imperfection

Why do we easily admit that people are imperfect, but at the same time we are so ashamed to admit our own shortcomings? It’s all about feeling insecure: weakness and imperfection make you feel vulnerable.

In turn, this feeling awakens a lot of frightening emotions that we would like to avoid. But I suggest you look at the vulnerability from the other side and use it to your advantage. How? Accepting it and feeling all the suppressed emotions. Of course, it takes courage to let go of control and allow yourself to experience bad feelings. But the result is worth it.

2. Realize why you want to change and what it will give you

Now you need to figure out why you decided to overcome your weaknesses. State the reasons as specifically as possible. What will change in your life, what will you do and feel when you get rid of the shortcomings? What benefits will the changes bring?

Let’s imagine that you often do not keep promises and obligations: for example, do not go to scheduled meetings. When you get better, you will start attending events more often (which means meeting new interesting people), stop deceiving yourself and others, and feel no guilt.

What will it give you? You will begin to respect yourself, feel the gratitude and respect of others, and live a fuller life. It’s worth the effort for this.

3. Understand how you benefit from your weakness

A major weakness gives you a sense of security. It’s time to figure out what benefits it brings. Your handicap developed gradually — it was your way of dealing with the challenges of the world and other people. Ask yourself: what purpose does this weakness serve? How does she help you? Think about what you are hiding from.

I know the questions are not easy, and as you contemplate them, you are likely to feel vulnerable again. But it is she who will help to radically change your life, to make it the way you want.

When you realize what benefit your main disadvantage brings, ask yourself if you need such «services»? Usually there are good reasons for enduring your lack for so long. You need to deal with them and start changing something.

4. Use your strengths

It’s time to list your virtues. Nothing comes to mind — turn to friends, relatives or colleagues. Ask them to name 3-5 of your main strengths. Even if you are able to make such a list, it is important to ask the opinion of others, they may have a different point of view.

Once you’ve made a list of your strengths, ask yourself how you can use them to overcome your weaknesses. Let’s go back to the example I gave above. Let’s say you have identified two important virtues — the ability to overcome obstacles and the ability to feel connected with others.

The logical step is to look at weakness as an obstacle to be overcome. You’ve done it before, so you know you can do it again. This knowledge will help switch the brain into action mode. Remembering your other strength, you will realize that by skipping events, you were depriving yourself of the opportunity to realize your gift to communicate with others.

Our mind is capable of much — it’s time to use its reserves to deal with shortcomings.

5. Ask loved ones to support you

To defeat your main weakness, you will have to work on yourself regularly, which means that you cannot do without support. Each of us has our own strengths and weaknesses, so why not use the strengths of your relatives and friends? Surely one of them successfully got rid of the shortcomings. Ask him to share his experience, give you advice or support you.

Try to find among friends and acquaintances those who can control you and will not let you go astray. Their support will simplify, and possibly speed up the work on yourself. It won’t be easy. You will have to face your fears, your doubts, the things that make you feel vulnerable. You have to change, and change is always scary.

But change is inevitable in any case, so it’s better not to go with the flow, but to take control of yourself so that the changes are beneficial and make your life better.

About the Author: Heather Moulder is a coach who helps clients find work-life balance.