“It is better to get rid of the fetus”: what pushes women to give birth at their own peril and risk, despite the requests of husbands and doctors

According to statistics, 1 in 1000 women are diagnosed with oncology during pregnancy. This is not only a problem for our country, but for the whole world. Doctors believe that over time, the incidence of cancer among expectant mothers will only grow, so now scientists are conducting the maximum amount of research, studying both women themselves and their newborns.

Breast and cervical cancer, melanoma, lymphoma and acute leukemia are the most popular types of cancer among pregnant women

A cancer diagnosis puts a pregnant woman in front of a difficult choice: either to terminate the pregnancy, or to postpone cancer treatment until delivery. There is also a third option – chemotherapy, which is as gentle as possible for the fetus. In any case, neither the gynecologist nor the oncologist can guarantee that the mother and baby will remain safe and sound. Therefore, women act at their own peril and risk, many want to continue the pregnancy, no matter what. There are some in Russia too.

One of them is Anastasia Kuzina from the Vladimir region:

“At the end of 2019, my submandibular lymph node on the left came out. On the ultrasound, the doctor did not see anything special. After drinking the antibiotic, I calmed down. Later, a tubercle was added to the lymph node. In the throat where the tonsils are. She ran to Laura, he: “It looks like tonsillitis.” Again antibiotic, but no improvement. She asked me to prescribe injections or even put me in the hospital, in response to laughter and comment that I want to poison my body. And after 2 weeks I found out that I was pregnant.

Almost nothing bothered me, only the sore throat was constant. I rinsed with everything that is possible during pregnancy. In September, 2 more lymph nodes got out, in October the tonsil became inflamed, there are plugs on it – and one of them opened. Without a record, I went to Lore, who with frightened eyes sent me to the area. They said it looked like cancer and asked what stage of pregnancy it is now. I replied that it was 25 weeks. “This is about 500-600 grams, not enough for childbirth,” the doctor said and advised an abortion. For an abortion ?! There is also a child, there is already a little man – with a heart, with arms and legs … All the way home I roared.

Five days of waiting for a biopsy. Malignant tumor. All oncology centers called, they agreed to admit me, a pregnant woman, only to Blokhin in Moscow, from there they were redirected to Kulakov. At the end of October, I had already completed the first course of chemotherapy. There were three of them before the birth. I didn’t feel sick, I felt pregnant. There were many questions: “What about the child?”

Maryana was born in early January this year, completely healthy, 8/9 points on the Apgar scale. After giving birth, I underwent a serious examination, and the result is excellent, everything is clean. The operation was canceled, but I was left with radiation therapy (35 sessions) and light chemotherapy. Yes, of course, nothing is good for the body, I will say briefly: everything suffers, but I don’t want to talk about it. The main thing is that now we have two princesses, and they give me strength and energy. I have no right to be depressed. “

A woman can give birth naturally an unlimited number of times, which cannot be said about a cesarean section. Doctors are ready to do this operation no more than 2-3 times, and then, as a rule, they offer tubal ligation, frightening with subsequent dangerous complications due to a scar on the uterus. However, it was not so easy to frighten the mother of many children Tatyana from Khabarovsk. The woman gave birth to five weather conditions and all – through a cesarean section.

“I left my first husband with four children. She got married again, the second husband had no children of his own. Therefore, I decided on the fifth cesarean. We approached this issue seriously, weighed all the risks and possible outcomes. They understood that I would have to lie in bed all the time, and my husband would somehow work at home. I was very worried about the divergence of the seam. It seemed that he was in great pain. I can say for sure that if I was not one hundred percent sure in my husband, in his help and care, I would hardly have taken such a step.

In fact, after the third COP, I thought that everything, further giving birth is very dangerous. That operation was extremely unsuccessful for me. But she made up her mind. During the fifth pregnancy, I saw only 2 scars, and no one could understand anything. Already after the fifth birth, I found out that these were scars from the first two operations, the third was excised during the fourth cesarean and a new one was made, and the suture from it successfully leveled off and became absolutely uniform with the uterus. This is how it happens.

So pah-pah-pah, everything went easily (for the fifth COP) and without any complications. 2 months after giving birth, my cycle recovered. I was examined by a doctor, he said, after the sixth it is possible, but not in Khabarovsk. “

“At 12 weeks, I was sent for the first screening and the ultrasound was reported about an increase in TVP (7,5 mm) and that they could not see the bones of the nose. They said to be sure to take a blood test for a predisposition to the birth of a child with pathology. I remember then my thoughts: “This is a mistake! What other syndromes, what anomalies, what are you talking about? ” After that I was told to wait 5 working days, and if they don’t call, then everything is in order. They called. The world inside collapsed, but I still believed that maybe the timing was wrong, maybe the tubes were mixed up.

The next morning I was in the geneticist’s office. I was told that the child has a huge cyst instead of a neck, which will contribute to the deformation of the skull and stop the development of the fetus. Inconsistency in the size of body parts. Boy or girl, this is still in question. Maybe “it”. I was offered to make a puncture for amniotic fluid intake in order to make an accurate diagnosis. I refused, I was scared. Then I was sent to terminate the pregnancy for medical reasons. I also refused an abortion. I went to another doctor.

There they explained to me again that such people do not live, they do not give birth to such people, that I doom my whole family, that I do not think about my sons. I signed the abortion waiver again. I went to a private clinic for an ultrasound scan, I did not say anything to the doctors about the previous conclusions, but even then everything was confirmed. They just added that the spinal cord is not formed in the spine, but outside, and an urgent interruption is required. I went outside and realized that I could not breathe. I met with the Pastor, he inspired me and said: “You will see, we will testify about the Great Miracle, the girl will be born and will live. She will glorify the Lord! ” Then I realized that I would go all the way.

At 39 weeks, I arrived for a planned hospitalization at the perinatal center. They looked at the baby and asked why I was giving birth to her. They thought that this was my firstborn, but when they found out that two more were waiting at home, they asked the question: “What if you change your mind when you see her. Leave it in the hospital? ” I understood that I needed to prepare mentally. But why?

Day X has come, Vera was born. I saw that the arms and legs were in place, the head was normal. I even wanted to pinch myself to understand, maybe I was knocked out during attempts and this is a dream … On the third day after giving birth, Vera underwent emergency heart surgery. The first year of life was not easy, we spent six months in hospitals, there were moments on the verge of life and death. Now Vera is growing and makes our whole family happy, thanks to the rehabilitation she walks. “

“Are you ready for your wife to lose her eyesight?”

Anastasia Parokonnaya, an oncologist-mammologist from the Oncology Center on Kashirka, recently spoke in her blog about a patient who is a carrier of the BRCA1 gene mutation. In Irina’s family, the entire female sex has had breast cancer: she herself, her mother and sister. If a woman gives birth to a daughter, she has a 50% chance of inheriting a “family” disease through the maternal line. But Irina is not afraid of such a prospect.… “I think if a girl is born, then when she grows up, science will figure out how to avoid getting breast cancer. Maybe scientists will learn to “neutralize this gene” – she reasons. Other women suffering from poor heredity adhere to similar views. Some believe in a happy accident, the second – in doctors, but everyone dreams of one thing: to become a mother and so that, contrary to forecasts, everything will be fine.

Unfortunately, not everyone is lucky. Since childhood, Ilya’s wife was registered with an ophthalmologist. High myopia, glasses as thick as a pencil. After the wedding, she immediately started talking about children, six months later she became pregnant. The gynecologist, flipping through her medical card, dissuaded: several operations on the eyes, two retinal detachments, on the paternal side they do not see their own fingers farther and farther. “You’d better get rid of the fetus,” he said to the expectant mother. “Are you ready for your wife to lose her eyesight?” He asked Ilya.

“It’s terrible, but I asked her to have an abortion. He said that we’d better take from the orphanage, save up for a surrogate mother. She wanted to give birth herself. She assured me that everything would work out, ”says the man. “The third retinal detachment happened after about 30 weeks. She hid that she saw almost nothing. I was lying all the time so that I would not guess. I was afraid that the doctors would send him to a cesarean and the baby would be born prematurely, and it would be sick. “

The birth began on time. When the woman was asked: “Well, mother, who was born to you?”, She could not answer. After being discharged from the hospital, the blind mother and baby were taken by Ilya’s parents. He himself comes to his family only on weekends, the rest of the time he works a lot so that, as soon as the borders are opened, he can take his spouse to Israel. In Russia, they refused to help her.

conclusions

Obstetrician-gynecologist Elena Petrovna Berezovskaya writes in her book “When You Are Ready” that many women are driven by a selfish desire to “produce” offspring, get pregnant and give birth in any way, in defiance of everyone, including your body. In this regard, a logical question begs: are they playing heroism or are they really heroines?