Contents
After a serious illness, my wife, leaving this world, left me to raise our two sons. The oldest was fifteen, the youngest nine. Soon the eldest son entered a music school and left for another city. There was an opportunity to realize my new knowledge and previous experience in raising my youngest son, fortunately, no one interfered. Ilya, the youngest of the sons, was a brave boy from birth, with a strong character. Even at the age of three, having met the offender of his older brother on the street, without hesitation, he hit him hard in the stomach, saying: “Why are you beating my brother?”
Until the age of nine, it was extremely difficult to educate him. At school, he studied reluctantly. He liked to walk on the street. Gradually he became a leader not only among his peers. He was respected and obeyed by guys two or three years older. For bad discipline, I was often called to school. Pressure on him in any form, even from the most positive intentions, did not produce results. Sermons and exhortations did not penetrate his soul.
The street gradually fascinated him, and I realized that in general I could lose contact with my son and influence on him. Having studied the latest achievements in the upbringing of children, I realized that children in general can be raised without prohibitions and punishments. The main thing is to skillfully build circumstances, then the educated person will go in the right direction of his own free will. And you also need to be sincere and honest in communicating with children and be an example to them in life.
I began to implement the processed knowledge in practice in my life. In order to educate a man, a boy needs to artificially create difficulties, after overcoming which his character grows stronger and his sense of responsibility grows. Taking into account the individual characteristics of the character and health of my son, as soon as he was 10 years old, I began to offer a week-long kayak trip without food at all. The trip was planned along the Don and its tributary (a small round-the-world trip). I assumed that he would be internally ready for such a campaign not earlier than in 1,5 — 2 years. However, after eight months, the son resolutely declared: “Let’s swim!”
I had doubts that Ilya would risk going on this trip, so I gave him another week to think. All the days I prepared organizationally and internally. I realized that in this campaign I should not only be a personal example, but also always be ready to psychologically support my son in difficult times so that his spirit remains at the right height.
A week has passed. The son did not change his mind. We leave tomorrow morning! With such an aspiring decision, we gathered all evening, discussing the features of the campaign. I have long built humor and irony in communication with my son into our lives and often noticed that he needed it. Conversations in this vein gave him a sense of freedom and mutual understanding in communication, and also developed his extraordinary thinking.
And then the morning of May 8, 1992 came. Due to the lack of buses, we were able to get to the Solyony farm at 14-30, then we walked 2,5 km with all our belongings. I was carrying a Taimen-2 tourist kayak, a backpack with a tent, warm clothes and all sorts of small things. Total weight is approximately 43 kg. My son has a backpack with two sleeping bags, warm clothes, various little things that he took on a hike, a bowl and dry dog food. We did not dare to subject our wonderful dog named Alma to a hungry test. She was very smart, a little trained and was an important addition to our campaign.
The weather was good. The sun was shining, a gentle wind was blowing. Moving away from the bus stop about five hundred meters, the son said that he was very tired and could no longer carry a backpack. I understood that the lack of lunch made itself felt. In addition, the most difficult days of a hungry journey are the first two or three days. So I told him: «Let’s carry your backpack, it’s not hard for me.» He gave me the backpack.
And with love for my son, walking heavily on the asphalt, it would seem that I did not pay attention to my burden at all, I told him about the beautiful nature, which we will meet on the journey. At the same time, I watched my son, his facial expressions and eyes.
In the first minutes, left without a backpack, he cheered up. Then, seeing that I was walking with such a load without rest, I became sad. He clearly did not expect such a calm reaction from me. Moreover, I constantly joked and raked out pluses from any little thing. This finally turned him on in a good way, and ten minutes later he asked for the backpack back. And more until the end of the journey I did not complain.
Forty minutes later we arrived on the banks of the Don. The approaching quiet warm evening affectionately invited us on our way. Having collected the kayak, we swam. Alma barked at the receding rocky shore, perhaps saying goodbye in her own language.
The bow of the kayak cut through the clear, burning cold water. In this place, water enters the Don River from the bottom of the Tsimlyansk Sea through the hydroelectric power station, so at this time of the year it is the coldest.
My plans included daily morning bathing in any weather, and I was already beginning to tune in to this procedure. After a two-hour march along the Dry channel, we reached the Chaika camp. While sailing, we saw a lot of ducks, a heron. Approaching the shore, we chose a place for a bivouac and settled down.
Shoulders and back buzzed after such an active start. I rowed alone in a kayak, allowing my son to adapt and admire the beauties of nature. We stopped on the opposite side of the camp, on the island. So safer, and even with a dog.
We pitched a tent and put on tea. We didn’t take any food for ourselves. We took only a bowler hat and two mugs for tea, so we went to look for tea leaves in the area. Nearby we found blossoming apricot and pear trees, picked flowers, added blackberry shoots. The tea turned out great. Ilya fed the dog and without any special incidents at ten o’clock in the morning we instantly fell asleep.
9 May, Saturday
Victory Day! Birds and nightingales sang all night long. We got a little cold in the morning, although we took enough clothes. We woke up at six o’clock, but we talked for another hour. They congratulated each other on the holiday. I reminded Ilya what a wonderful grandfather he had. He went through the whole war from Moscow to Berlin. He hoisted the Banner of Victory and signed the Reichstag: «Makarov from the Volga.» I told my son my understanding of war and peace and the historical attitude of our compatriots to this.
We decided not to have tea. I did a short run and jumped into the water. Meditative preparation had an effect, the water seemed to me even warm. Having dried in the wind, he did exercises. A pleasant warmth spread through my body. Now you can say that I am completely in nature. I did not force my son to these procedures, I only talked about their benefits.
The plans of our campaign included not only leaving cleanliness behind us, but also not breaking a single green branch. We made stakes for the tent from dry wood. They made a fire, collected all the rubbish in the area, including plastic bags, and burned everything.
We packed our things and hit the road at ten o’clock in the morning. We decided to have breakfast afloat. I took the mug, scooped up water and drank. He said to his son: «Catch a mug, now it’s your turn to have breakfast.» The water in this course of the river is clean and there should be no undesirable consequences. “A man should be unpretentious,” I encouraged my son, “after all, he is a warrior.”
Half an hour later, fishermen began to meet. We talked to one of them. He told us that the fish here are small, and advised us to fish on the other side. I told him that we are not fishermen, but travelers. If only he knew that we are not only not fishermen, but also not eaters.
Stopped for tea around XNUMXpm. Tea was with nettle, plantain and wormwood. The wind was fair, and we decided to make a small sail out of plastic sheeting and a tree branch. Along the way, we stopped to take pictures of the bird market. Birds made their nests-burrows in a steep bank. The kayak silently swam up to the shore, and without moving, we were surprised to observe a natural phenomenon.
At 17-00 we decided to make a bivouac. The tea was very tasty made from peeled blackthorn branches and nettles. At 18-30 we climbed into the tent, decided to rest a bit and suddenly fell asleep, fatigue made itself felt.
10 May, Sunday
We woke up at night, decided to make fireworks, a fiery fountain (I bought it for fireworks in honor of Victory Day). Ilya unloaded another firecracker and scared away all the crows. There were many of their nests on the poplars around us. As soon as we climbed into the tent, it began to rain heavily. The weather began to deteriorate in the evening, it got colder and became cloudy. The rain kept us in the tent until 10 am. The tent is single and it is a little cramped in it, especially when you are not sleeping. But we did not get bored, we talked a lot about life. I communicated with my son as with an adult and understood that this is exactly what he needs now.
Then I again made a morning exercise with swimming. This day is the hardest. The body before the transition to a new mode of operation makes itself felt. I had a malaise since the evening, and my son came today. If before his hunger did not pester, today he said several times that he wants to eat. Weakness and a slight headache also bothered him. I knew that tomorrow it would pass and encouraged him. Assembling the tent, they found that the night cracker frightened the crows so much that they cleaned not only it, but everything around. It should be noted that every time we stop for the night, we take out the kayak and take it to the tent, wherever we put it. This time the coast was steep, and it was not easy to make it.
We set sail at 11:30. Today the weather did not favor us. During the night the wind changed and began to blow towards us. We got out to a wide place of the channel. It has become a full-flowing river. Naturally, the flow slowed down. To go with a strong headwind on the oars is a little pleasure. In addition, the three-kilometer section of the channel was almost straight, and this made it possible for the waves to roam. However, my tone was good, and I rowed until three in the afternoon. At about XNUMX pm we stopped for the night. On the shore they found fishing tackle in perfect order, but only without hooks. But we were not upset, today we drank only bare boiling water, there was nothing suitable for tea leaves on the shore. The weather began to improve. The wind has died down, the sky has cleared, we are sitting by the fire, talking. How important it is to talk heart to heart with your son at this age, to help him form values and beliefs that will lead him into later life. And most importantly, do not forget — to be a personal example to him. Today we went to bed late.
11 MAY MONDAY
We woke up at seven o’clock, earlier than usual, but fell asleep again. When you are hungry, you want to sleep a lot. I got up at eight o’clock, did another jog with a swim. The weather is just great. Quiet in the morning. The sun. Dew. The sky is clear. There are still a lot of ducks and all kinds of birds. We continued on our way.
There was a slight headwind, but it did little to spoil our mood. At 12 o’clock we were at the confluence of the canal with the Don. I expected it to be tomorrow, already ahead of schedule by one day. We stopped on the beach to wander.
Throughout the path, traces of a human consumer, an egoist, are visible. Either this concerns the industrial use of nature, or individual people, fishermen. Disfigured coast, often come across plastic bags, campfires.
The great philosopher and artist Nikolai Konstantinovich Roerich said: «The consciousness of beauty will save the world.» Ignorance, lack of culture is the cause of all troubles. If all of us and the leaders of our state put culture in the first place, begin to form high values from childhood, instill morality, the concept of beauty, knowledge of natural laws, then our beloved Russia will become truly flourishing and prosperous. And everyone in it will live happily.
A strong wind arose, and at 13-30 we set off up the Don. But here the wind was already our ally, as we changed the direction of movement. So we sailed several kilometers and at 16-00 we stopped for the night.
Special signs of a navigable river: there are self-propelled guns under the Russian flag. Somehow it makes me happy to meet them. We pulled our belongings ashore, decided to rest a little, and slept until seven o’clock in the evening. We got up, put up a tent and decided to sit by the fire. The evening is amazing. Complete calm. The moon is in the sky, our companion. The sky is clear. Annoying weakness, slightly increased heart rate and an unpleasant sour taste in the mouth — a sign of the release of toxins from the body. My son has a similar feeling, and he is doing well.
The island where we stopped was small, two hundred meters long and three meters high. But there is a lot of firewood brought by the flood. In the meantime, they kindled a fire, warmed themselves with boiling water. We sit on the shore, on a dry log. We watch how tenderly the flame dances in the fire, and listen to nature.
He told his son how he admired the beauty of the starry sky from early childhood. Showed some constellations. There are myriads of beautiful stars above us, I told him, the cosmos is literally seething with conscious life that we do not yet know about. I think that in the coming decades, humanity will truly understand the beauty of the universe and meet intelligent life. With these thoughts, we went to bed.
May 12, Tuesday
We hit the road at 9-30, managed to take pictures of nature. The weather is great. Quiet. Warmly. The sun. Let’s go rowing, we don’t need a sail, besides, it was swept away by a wave, we somehow didn’t notice it. After an hour or an hour and a half, a slight tailwind picked up, and we decided to stop and make a new sail from a kayak package.
We stopped in the area of some camp site. Ilya decided to feed our guard, the dog Alma, and discovered that the dry food for her had disappeared somewhere. “Perhaps I forgot to put it in my backpack yesterday,” he told me sadly. I did not scold him, but only answered: “You were responsible for this, therefore you must adequately and calmly find a way out of this situation. If there are any difficulties, I can help.
After some thought, he realized that it could be fed with fish, but where to get it? “You have to catch it in the river,” he said. But this is not easy for us to do. After my hint, he made a decision: «The dog is small, I’ll ask the fisherman.» Fine!
Using a large dry branch, we quickly made a sail. It’s bigger and better than the old one. We sailed for half an hour, then the wind died down and we had to switch to oars. Ilya felt much better, he no longer reminded me of food. Even tried to help row.
We swam up to one of the fishermen, and he donated a small zander to Ilya. Thanks, we moved on. At 15:30 we stopped for the night. They began to wander along the shore and found several boletus boletus with Ilyusha. He stayed to wash them, cut them, and string them on a thread to dry. After walking around, I did not find more mushrooms. But he discovered a rosehip bush and brewed excellent tea with its roots. Ilya refused tea, and I drank a few mugs.
While they were sitting around the fire, Ilya found an old sinker on the shore, melted it in a tin can, and made two lead rods out of it, first pouring the melt into holes prepared in damp sand. At 22-00 we were already sound asleep.
13 May, Wednesday
I got up at eight o’clock. The morning greeted us with a gentle sun, its rays pleasantly warmed us. It was quiet. We decided not to rush. They burned all the plastic bags and bottles that were lying around. At the beginning of the eleventh they set sail from the beautiful cleared shore.
They rowed all the time. Stanitsa Romanovskaya suddenly appeared at 13-00. We decided to stop on the opposite side. We spent all the nights on the islands located between the large duct of the Dry and the main channel of the Don. It was safer that way.
I told Ilya that we reached the village a day and a half ahead of schedule. “If you are very tired,” I said, “and you want to go home, then on the other side we can take a bus and in an hour we will be at home. If you have the strength and your spirit is strong, then tomorrow you need to seriously engage in the repair of the kayak, sum up the results of our Odyssey, fulfill the plan, and arrive home in a day and a half. Ilya decided to stay. “This is the decision of a real man,” I encouraged him. During this time, we will rest, gain strength, if we can gain it, and finish on schedule.”
We chose a place for a bivouac. A good hut, still last year’s fishing hut, has been preserved on the shore. We laid a foam mattress in it and plopped down to rest. It is now 18-00, but we did not set up a tent. I brewed tea from the remnants of the rosehip root. It turned out fragrant, but Ilya again refused it. Drinks only water. In addition to the hut in this parking lot, we also found a bench. So, we put it on the shore and talked about life, sitting on it for an hour. We went to bed as usual at ten o’clock.
May 14, Thursday
We got up quickly. In general, everything was done slowly today. I made a brush out of dog hair to apply rubber glue and repaired the kayak for three hours. They cleaned the dishes. True, of all the dishes we have a small bowler hat and two mugs. Not far on the shore was a small pine forest. So we went and breathed clean air. Then I took notes, and Ilya read the newspapers.
During the day I still managed to bask in the sun a little, sunbathe. And Ilya flatly refused, leaving this idea for the summer. Tomorrow morning we will cross to the other side and go home.
And so our journey has come to an end. The dog ran out of fish yesterday, and it seems to be very hungry. Everything is roaring, something is nibbling. The evening got colder and the wind picked up. The night promised to be cold. We climbed into the tent at 21-00 and told each other fairy tales for a long time.
15 May, Friday
It rained a little during the night, but it didn’t wet us. And the night really turned out to be cold, but Ilya was warm in a sleeping bag.
Morning. Hooray! We have fully implemented the program. We have succeeded! Gathered, sailed away from the shore, said goodbye to the island. We went to the other side. They just dried up, formed, as a little rain passed, but it was no longer a hindrance to us.
The way back with backpacks was much easier. Ilya was on the bus, he lost weight, but his eyes were happy, the eyes of a winner. And I felt good and happy. I have found my way to my son’s heart over and over again.
Video from Yana Shchastya: interview with professor of psychology N.I. Kozlov
Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be in order to successfully marry? How many times do men get married? Why are there so few normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A story that couldn’t be better. Paying for the opportunity to be close to a beautiful woman.